yest came back 2D1N Lim Chu Kang tour.. chiong sua ah..super tired.. lack of sleep..these few days outfield rainy.. lotsa of mosquitoes n flies n muddy.. this ICT is prob our most xiong cos its ATEC2 .. those who dunno wat tat means u have not gone NS..when everyone is gg thru the same thing.. everyone is out for each other.. even when ppl are complaining but actuali everyone jus wanna do well..
watched Die hard 4.0 yest wif R and A.. its really die hard loh.. john mcclaine i.e bruce willis like superman.. cannot die one loh..some of the scenes abit kua zhang leh like the one he drives the car to crash the helicopter.. or the scene where the F35 tries to shoot him down along the expressway.. the way he bash maggie Q may be quite disturbing for feminist out there..ha.. but overrall the action is good lah.. his wisecracks as usual funny.. overrall give 4 stars.. next stop Harry Potter..
just made $100 from buying and selling jade technologies.. my acct finally reinstated after i settled outstanding debts wif the sale of advsct and taking some profit.. lost 100 ringgit over weekend at genting.. made 115 ringgit at start but later lost it.. i agree wif wat SM said.. ppl will not stop when they are winning and so when they continue to play it is likely they will have a net loss in the end.. SM treated me to Basking Robbins to cheer me up.. think overrall we had a great trip.it was a great bonding session wif the classmates who came. only regret was we din visit the theme park
had dinner wif WJ on monday at sushi tei.. long time din see her liao but she looks the same except prob thinner..sent her off to airport yest morning..so qiao saw council fren XY in the same queue at airport. she was gg to San Francisco to find her fiance
yest wanted to watch die hard but no tix.. in the end played pool wif R, WH and A. long time din play liao.. think abt 2 years ba.. but not bad i still got abit skill..haha..lost to R, won WH and "draw" wif A.. as in any game there is always 反败为胜..as i was playin..i was jus thinkin 世事无绝对.. every situation in life is like any game.. i was on a losing roll wif WH b4 i hit 3 balls in and won..similarly A was on losing roll b4 i gave him a ball in hand n bcos of tat the game change.. life is like tat.. there are no sure winners or losers.. but the ultimate winner is the one who knows how to take things as they are at the moment and make the best use...
torres gg liverpool.. i feel he will be a solid player.. although CH disagrees..
went wif TH to SJ last fri.. crowded but quite like the place..
7th July alot of ppl got married.. saw abt 3-4 bridal cars on the roads tat day..
recently watchin this HK cantonese drama 溏心风暴 at nite.. its on vcd tat J lent me.. it was the top TVB drama for 2006.. but its really quite addictive..
otherwise readin up on BaselII for my project.. yest read up on Private equity and venture capital until i fell asleep.. bedtime stories sia..
jus read something tat struck me.." he had high ambitions unmatched by his abilities" .. yest was talking to MW.. he is a friendly person .. not to mention smart too.. but yet i feel his attitude to work leaves much to desire.. he wants to achieve alot but thru out my whole conversation wif him.. he jus wants to do things the easy way.. sayin things like thru backdoor connections etc.. i was readin tis report on top equity analysts and none of them did not mention hard work as the recipe for their success..
as a man thinks so is he.. there is no shortcut to success.. if u want to achieve greatness.. u need to hone yur skills and abilities thru hard work.. do yur best and God will do the rest..
newspapers reviews buay zun one lah.. say transformers only 2 stars.. i give it 4 stars lah..great action.. but its a guys kind of movie wif lotsa guns, explosions, fighting.. gals prob wun like lah..
yeah i passed module 1B on securities trading today.. unexpectedly.. taut i will fail but in the end got the highest score band..ha.. forced myself to study last nite even though i was very tired..hard work really pays off..
the movie hot fuzz is nice! at first i taut its those usual slapstick buddy cop comedy but in the end comedy, action and suspense all have.. the 2.5 hrs like passed very fast cos got twists and turns.. better than expected sia..but must be prepared to read chinese subtitles cos sometimes the british accent is just too difficult to catch and u may jus miss their jokes.. give it 4 stars out of 5..solid!
finally cleared module 4A on coporate finance jus now.. next up is 1B on securities trading.. R was sayin i becomin over-qualified.. masters.. cfa .. cmfas..ha..i am jus kiasu lah.. i am a studyholic..
more ppl commentin tat i look tired.. eyes macham old man... haiz.. result of overwork plus overstudy.. sometimes i think i am too ambitious..
But thank God i passed 4A this time.. otherwise will be super sian..
Managed to catch Ocean13 yest.. Ocean and Rusty are cool lah.. i prefer Brad Pitt's rusty..yandao and xiao sa as usual.. ai zai and make it seem so easy.. reminds me of something i heard over weekend..naturally supernatural.. supernaturally natural..
Fan4 ok lah but i think jessica alba not as pretty as b4 leh.. and some of their jokes fall flat lah..
Ocean13 give 3.5/5, fan4 give 3/5
still can;t get a slot to clear module4A for cmfas.. during the time i din blog.. i cleared 6 and 7 even though i taut i would fail 7.. but thank God i passed..hope can clear 1B and 4A before july..
readin up alot on hedge funds, property valuation for my new posting to come.... which only very few ppl know..low profile now cos chinese saying.. big tree alot of wind..ha..recently got this stack of Bloomberg magazines for my consumption.. good stuff!
heard 刘畊宏's song on radio last nite and this morning.. land of canaan..overflowing with milk and honey.. biblical sia.. rem the last time he came our church.. he told us abt his new album..the lyrics are good lah..
jus now went to MAS to sit for CMFAS module 6 exams on securities analysis.. this song kept replayin in my mind as i did the paper on the pc..din study finish last nite, arrived late, ppl ard me failing as i peeped at their results after they finish..taut i was gg to fail too.. but thank God i pass.. not bad lah 79 out of 100.. passin mark is 70..some guy was complainin to his wife over the phone.. he got 69.. jus 1 more mark.. too bad..
gg to clear module 4A on corporate finance and module 7 on futures..
i din tell alot of ppl abt the major decision tat i makin.. haiz.. alot of ppl hear from other ppl..anw partly cos i dun wanna to feel sad or seek attention.. i jus wanna be 潇洒
yest portfolio was alright.. easier than the derivatives one.. but easy paper may not score.. i usually score in the difficult papers when everyone incl me found it killer.. its the bell curve normal distribution lah
think i will suffer from study withdrawal syndromes after studyin so much these few days.. gotta find some stuff to challenge myself during the hols.. either cmfas or was thinkin if got any basel course..prob can up my resume wif such a course..
its survival of the fittest now at smu lib..see who is last man standin..ha.. some left home liao.. for dinner.. some too tired.. but i will win it again as usual lah cos no transport , family or dinner constraints..
RGMI called me for interview on monday.. see how it goes..
piang eh.. think this is the longest while since i din blog.. supposed to be studyin exams lah..most of the time i am..ha.. but in between since last entry i went to see 2 plays.. one is broadway beng and other is swimming instructor.. broadway beng is quite funny lah.. swimming instructor quite alright but the part when the 2 guys kiss.. aiyo.. cannot take it lah..wait a minute.. i not supposed to be studyin exams meh.. aiya study hard play hard mah..ha
yest derivatives paper i felt was ok lah except for question 3 on interest rate duration.. din study much on tat.. now still in school mugging for my portfolio paper.. really alot to read loh..
think i will clear cmfas modules during my break.. siao bo? break stil wanna study somemore..ha.. i am like tat lah.. i either need to make money or make my brain work.. else i dun find the challenge.. mayb go holiday.. haven;t decided where yet..
yest CL dropped by N280 to evaluate me..CL sms me to speak slower jus b4 she came.. i think i did well lah.. wrote on every sermon page to speak slowly.. CA very cute lah.. half way thru when i started to speed up.. she was sitting beside me then she pointed to my "speak slowly"..
alot of ppl sayin I looked really tired.. i feel ok leh .. think i used to it liao.. but really past few nites slept at most 3-4 hrs.. thu nite slept only 1-2 hrs.. comin week will be worse lah.. this semester really the heaviest lah..
saturated.. really studied whole day today except took break in afternoon.. watched half of this movie on AXN call rundown starring The Rock.. was jus flippin channels while eatin my lunch then quite nice leh.. alot of action
oh yah also took break to run at ntu..hey i am improving sia..ha..CHT sms me say she haven;t started studyin.. told her she better start panicking ..ha
jus now while eatin dinner saw on CNA the sad footage of the burial of the 2 NSF who died in Taiwan after the plane crashed into where they were.. I felt saddened when one of the dead's frens commented that he was a great fren and smart guy who topped his level in school..
it got me thinkin.. these 2 guys had a long great future ahead but all was gone in a flash.. in a freak accident that they could not have escaped or prevented.. all the things they could have done in a lifetime.. finished university.. embark on their career.. set up family.. travel the world.. see their kids grow up.. spend time wif their partners, frens, families and loved ones.. all gone..
when incidents like this happen.. even like wat happened in the virginia shooting.. there can be 2 responses...one response is that we become cynical of life.. wats the point of working hard.. wats the point of being such a nice person.. wats the point of doing good.. wats the point of obeying the law..at the end of the day I might jus die suddenly like wat happened to the 2 guys and victims of freak accidents, natural disasters and events beyond our control.. so wats the point .. i might as well enjoy while i am alive .. i will live as i am pleased.. be a slacker.. no point planning so much.. in the end things wun work out.. no point being a nice person.. bad things still happen to good guys.. do as i like loh.. sleep around.. cheat ppl of their money and feelings, take drugs.. watever feels good just do it and die a happy person..
such thinkin is so familiar cos i jus heard it from someone last week..haiz..
wats the other response? U live every moment of yur life to the fullest.. u make the best of what life has to offer u.. u make an impact on the ppl ard u that even if yur life is cut short by something beyond u .. u can meet God and He will say "Well done good and faithful servant".. even when u r long gone, ppl will rem u for the good deeds , the little things, the words of encouragement, the listening ear, the shoulder to cry on.. the great person u have been.. even if ur life is cut short..u will go to heaven satisfied that u have tried yur best, fought the good fight and lived a life that yur heavenly Father will be proud of .. be it in yur career, relationships , studies.. u have done yur best in the short time tat u are around..
Which response will u take today? Many times, things dun turn out the way we want or expect it to but we make the best of it and believe that ultimately all things work for the good of those who love and trust God..
think i am too relac liao.. everybody i meet in school studyin like super stressed.. ha.. and the fact i can still waste time blogging.. having dinner wif frens.. gg to see movies and shows show tat i am not stressed enuff yet.. mayb tats jus me.. a last min person...
CH has aldy come up with the formula cheat excel spreadsheet template for the binomial model, american n european with put/call/option free.. gave me a sample.. gotta work it out myself lah though i know he will still share wif me eventually..ha cos we are part of the "dream team"
Yest when i was talking to C.. i jus came up wif a good analogy.
Why do ppl become emotionally detached?
When u have an ice cream.. it tastes fantastic initially but when u keep having it for the every meal for the next couple of days.. it gets yucky.. then u keep looking out for better tasting ice cream to satisfy yur craving.. so u keep looking.. keep eating and keep looking some more..forever trying to find yur ultimate "golden" ice cream.. thinking u will be satisfied when u find it..the truth is unless ur thinking changes.. u will never find this "golden" ice cream and u will never be satisfied.. in fact u will become harder to please each time .. u will become more indifferent each time.. until ur thinking changes.. u become contented jus to be able to have that ice cream u are holdin now..that is when u have true contentment and satisfaction..
even as i was thinkin and talkin abt it.. i taut abt some ppl i know who go from one relationship to another.. each one being shorter and shorter.. i taut of ppl i know who are super eligible but yet can never settle down.. they have got a long list of criteria for their "golden" ice cream.. as long as one criteria is not met.. there off it goes.. and the ice cream search continues.. soon they become jus indifferent and emotionally detached.. its just another ice cream to them.. if it doesn't taste good.. i jus throw it away..
Yur life changes only when yur thinking changes.. as a man thinks, so is he..
Life is the best of what we made it to be.. u can change jobs, change partners, change location, change everything cos u feel wat u r having now is mundane, boring, suffocating..but wun it be the same thing all over again after a while wif the once new job, partner, place?
if u r forever looking for things jus to excite and make u happy then i can say u will never be satisifed until ur thinking changes.. until u start being grateful to God for wat u have and make the best of what u are given.. the happiest moments in life are in the extraordinary tat we create in the ordinary routine of everyday life..i read this before..happiness is not always having wat u love but loving wat u have..
for me, i will just have my one ice cream and slowly appreciate it for the rest of my life..
Can't believe i am bloggin at such unearthly hour when i shld b sleepin.. actuali came back not long ago.. had a long talk wif Mum abt somethin..its some major decision i gg to make.. its not abt BGR but somethin i have been thinkin for some time..yet again its so major a decision tat i think its unwise for me to blog abt it.. ask me yurself if u want to know.. ha..
watched spiderman3 on fri with KWH and RO.. i felt spiderman2 was still nicer leh.. but this one is not bad either.. some basic themes include forgiveness,letting go and everyone having the freewill to make their choices in life..
today pastor shared a sidenote durin the svc msg on beatitudes, sermon on the mount.. this sidenote caught my attention other than of cos the main theme on brokenness.. the sidenote was abt how the worse thing when a rift happens between 2 ppl is indifference, trying to ignore and avoid , hoping things will resolve by itself..
Jus now YS called me to tell me abt her parents havin a hugh quarrel over a small matter of some prawn peeling.. she felt the whole thing was so stupid..but i told her the underlying issue is not this.. but pent up frustration accumulated over the years that exploded on such a small matter.. i told her tat as their daughter, she can;t let things try to settle by themselves cos they won't..ties in wif the sidenote pastor spoke abt earlier.. tryin to sweep things under the carpet is not gg to work..as their daughter she gotta step in and mediate to mend the relationship.. tat is how God can use her as a good testimony in her home..
over the years so many times i have stepped in to calm things down when my parents quarrelled.. i hear both side of the stories.. make my parents see the big picture tat they do still love each other regardless of certain wrongdoings or miscommunication and as such their relationship have improved over the years when certain things are voiced out and resolved.. of cos at the end of the day they loved me even more cos i made things work out for them.. ha..hope i can apply this to my own marriage next time as well.. communication is really the key to a successful relationship..
it also reminded me of the love between Mj and Spiderman when they both misunderstood each other but yet try to avoid each other until Sandman and Venom kidnapped MJ tat they realised tat no problem is greater than their love for each other.. bible says perfect love casts off restraints.. jus like God's unconditional love.. when u are assured tat yur parents, spouse or frens love u regardless of yur weaknessess, yur idiosyncracies, yur past, u will be open and transparent and bcos u are open and they dun condemn or despise u after knowin abt ur imperfections tat u are further assured .. it works in a cycle.. tats why most ppl can only confess and communicate to God thru prayer abt their deepest issues cos they feel that only God will not see them differently due to His grace and mercy..
wat applies in the supernatural applies in the natural.. i believe we can have the same sort of open communication wif our close loved ones to build healthy, strong relationships if we choose to..
AC thrashed Man U loh.. LV say tat he watched the match and taut Watford would have played better than Man U loh..anw 2007 is a repeat of 2005 finals .. Ac vs Pool.. all Pool fans were very happy these few days loh.. my frens like CH, LV, SX.. even YH who mayb readin this blog also loh.. anw we beat AC before in 2005.. we will beat them again .. we got psychological advantage over them..You will never walk Alone!!
received my posting letter jus now at work.. officially will be transferred to IT side on 1 July.. taut it will be end of July.. but anw it doesn;t make a difference.. guess my bonus and increment this year will be affected.. those old fogeys sure to rank me lowest one loh cos of the transfer..suan le
received sms to acknowledge my NS callup.. piang eh.. last week of june got one bo liao route march thing at amoy quee..then mid july have MVT which is expected.. then end july to early august is the real meat.. this time Atec.. gg to be xiong loh..ok lah another time of reunion wif the chao ah bengs.. gg to inhale alot of 2nd hand smoke again loh..
jus now portfolio class test was ok lah.. actually alot of us got all different answers.. so not really ok.. but immune to it aldy.. CT told me online she sick so not takin the test so the weightage goes to the exams.. sick for 2 days liao..guess quite stressful for her there at Credit Suisse eh..
SYS asked me give her lift home jus now cos she din drive today.. really wanted to but then i was meeting C after my lesson cos she got a new guy tenant at her house so she abit scared .. asked me come over.. think i spending alot of time wif C recently..hmm.. is it good or bad?
went to C 's place to use her pc to upload ML's foto into CMS cos sending ML and MK for promotion.. i gotta go back on my own word to let EY contact ML cos ML's passport photocopy softcopy was wif him.. see lah thats wat happens when couple break up loh... yur things at my place.. my things at yur place. anw thank God that EY managed to send me.. but missed the 10pm dateline.. not sure if K still accept.. else too bad for ML lah...C's dumplings were quite nice to eat ah.. tat was dinner for me..helped her fix her DVD player too..
later after work gg wif KWH and RO to watch spiderman3.. next time seldom see them aldy when transfer..
ok.. gotta sleep liao..
jus some tauts..i realise lettin go and moving on is key to living a happy life..its easy to say but hard to do but u jus gotta bite the bullet and do it.. jus now i know tat EY has really moved on from ML.. and i could see him much happier on tues than last time when he was struggling.. even when i talk to C.. i feel that she has certain hurts and memories which she had not let go.. causing her to be emotional and depressed at times.. sometimes even when i read ppl's blogs i have the feelin that they are still holding onto the past when they know things cannot work out..
like i say b4.. sometimes we want to prove certain things in life.. either it is according to our expectations or against our expectations.. we try to reason , relive, recapture bygones, we try to prove it was meant to be or it wasn't meant to be.. but some things are better left unsaid, left hidden and buried, left to fade away
cos mayb things are jus as they are.. nothin to second guess.. nothing to prove.. live up to it, let go and move on..u will definitely be happier
Yeah Liverpool is thru!!..Agger's goal was good.. Kuyt's goal shld have stood.. at 1st i also taut offside..but after replay and commentator's comment.. it is definitely not offside loh..anw Reina is number 1 keeper in the world lah..penalty specialist sia.. saved Robben and Geremi's shots.. Zenden, Alonso, Gerrard and Kuyt all scored..4-1 on penalties after extra time 1-1 aggregate.. game ended at 530am.. msg LV and CH..ha.. they also were watching..super tired now.. if AC gets thru .. then its deja vu of 2005 finals all over again..
sunday.. after givin bs to MK.. last min got pm..after pm met J at cck.. she was playin mj wif her relatives there.. she passed me the HK drama series which she said good.. then met E at Fong Seng near NUS for dinner.. wanted to go Holland V after tat but in the end saw GK and his new Honda Stream.. he was gettin his fren to wash and wax.. so we jus stood there and talk abt cars.. teachers earning not bad eh.. he changed 3 cars liao while i still wif my "wife".. ha.. C asked me to help her study for her basic theory.. picked her up at her condo and went KAP
monday.. after work went wif KWH and RO for dinner at Ding Ting Feng at Paragon.. wanted to watch spiderman but only out on tues.. went HMV walk then went to meet C after her dinner wif her housemates..
tuesday.. saw H before the concert while i was waitin for the other zone ldrs to give them their cds.. she brought her mum.. long time din see or msg her liao.. so jus sms her.. taut she wun reply lah but she did.. so jus sms exchange for awhile..the whole family day event was good lah.. but unhappy abt somethin.. wun elaborate.. haiz..
recently dun have any ideas for trading.. need some inspiration to make money...
felt tat din lead well during yest cg..it was not very bad yet not smooth as previous week..
after cg..suppose to help my bro move some things from his fren's house wif my car.. but in the end postponed to this morning.. instead met C and went dinner/supper at bukit timah.. the kolo mee she recommend really nice to eat loh.. went back to get car.. then alamak.. cannot start.. in the end C say walk back to her house so i carry my heavy laptop walk back wif her.. at bukit batok.. quite far loh.. reach there 1 plus.. then took cab home..
i realise tat i really can talk to anyone.. ha..last nite when my car can;t start.. i apologised to a bus uncle cos i was supposedly parking at his lot.. then started talking to him..talked to the cabdriver last nite.. told me some interesting stories of his passengers.. this morning talked to the cabdriver who fetched me back to bukit timah to get the car..not tat i talk alot lah but i think its inherent in me aldy to know how to make small talk cos always meetin new ppl in church and in work..
anw slept 4 hrs.. woke up 7 plus .. took cab to rush down bukit timah cos workshops half day today and if i am not early.. my car cannot be done by today.. then i realised how silly i was.. the car was not spoilt.. haiz.. i accidentally had parked it at reverse gear..and auto cars are like tat cos electronically controlled.. tats why the engine couldn't start last nite..then tio summon cos i had parked at season parkin lot..but i decided to jiang cuo jiu cuo.. i called up URA.. told them i wanted to appeal cos my car was spoilt ( at least i taut it was last nite), told me to send in the receipt of repair as proof for the appeal.. so i went to STAR workshop, got my exhaust fixed which was really not on good condition and so...(if u dun understand my plot.. its ok).. street smart eh.. ha..
fetched my bro to his fren's house at Toh Tuck to collect 3 hugh boxes of cds,vcds, dvds and books cos his fren gg overseas for long term and so donating to my bro's aldy large collection..the boxes were really heavy loh..
J wanted to pass me this set of TVB vcd drama tat she say really nice to watch.. but at vivo.. then she wif her family so told her another day lah..
oh yah my speeding fine and demerit point on good friday got waived.. ha.. Thank God..dunno why it was waived also..i was sharing last nite wif my N280.. think i din mention in previous post but i forgot abt speed camera along boon lay way after sendin CH home late tat nite then ka chak.. saw the flash .. the blood of Jesus cleansed my sins plus traffic offenses..ha
Gain $1oo from Baker Tech but still endlessly holding onto Armada, AdvSCT and GKE.. haiz.. dunno when can offload..
yest skip second half of lesson wif M and gave her lift home..she and KL guy like cmi liao.. long distance relationship seldom work out lah.. went wif C for supper at KAP.. out of curiosity we explored some condo nearby.. then went her condo to play guitar.. haiz think i rusty liao.. not as good as b4.. reach home abt 1plus.. i am a nite person lah
yest out of nowhere AL called me to give me job lobang at Statestreet and her own lobangs.. grateful sia.. long time din contact her since cny mj session but yet she still rem abt me..my jc class group of west gang jie meis are nice ppl lah.. so many yrs we still keep in contact..anw i dun think AL reads my blog but grateful sia.. of cos will treat her meal lah even if i dun get the jobs she recommend..
recently some of my classmates suan me say i very popular wif gals..haiz.. no leh..i not yandao or rich leh.. i guys and gals also can mix one lah.. then they have some inaugural ranking of the gals in our class.. top is of cos M, second is CT and third is SM..i was telling M abt it and she say the guys so sec sch and childish..haha.. but all top 3 i happen to be close to them..the other guys jus jealous lah..ha.. M no need to say lah.. CT is my study buddy plus project mate and SM is the "mistaken gf" bcos of the lounge incident..ha..then we always jus play along whenever we meet in school..ha.. aiya but all jus frens lah..
haiz... in my heart, i am jus wondering how she is doing..hey but i am 潇洒派..dun wanna think too much either..mayb it will jus die a natural death..its 可惜 but at least i got to know her better for a period of time..
Talk abt multi tasking.. here i am in early hrs of morning.. trying to finish up a report to send..reading my textbook and newspapers.. as well as watching champions league and blogging .. of cos the last 2 are the most impt...ha..
1st half gone.. haiz.. Joe Cole.. why u always score against liverpool? Fight back.. fight back..score tat away goal and defend..
No lessons yest.. dunno why it was cancelled.. in the end met up with VT's fren C for dinner and bring her ard SMU cos she also wanna register for the masters course.. so i was tour guide for the night.. ate subway at Raffles City Shopping Centre then spent quite some time at GNC cos she wanted to buy some weight loss pills and we literally interrogated the sales assistant who was very friendly.. haiz.. zabos all the same one.. always think they fat..
then last min we decided to catch a movie..9 plus liao.. so chiong down to Cineleisure to catch this show call "wild hogs" which C saw aldy but dun mind seeing again cos she say funny.. we reach there just on time 940.. then perfectly there are 2 seats left on last row in centre somemore.. ha.. solid lah..the show quite funny la.. no brainer kind of entertainment but i guess if there is one thing i learned is that real men are not those who are tough physically but those who face up to their challenges in everyday lives.
the way C behaves reminds me abit of E's classmate S last time.. same mannerism macham small girl..
Lost $200 plus from Lereno and Berlian.. but make another $100 back from Acma.. i 'm not warren buffett to buy and hold.. neither am i soros who make markets move according to his whims and fancies..nobody can win forever... i will be kiddin u if i say so..impt point is to know when to cut loss when the stocks are gg nowhere..yest NASDAQ and S&P experienced correction upon fresh economic data.. hope the Armada i bought will rebound after this..
Jus now while driving to work.. heard on the radio this old song which i used to like alot in sec sch/jc.. "Come Undone" by Duran Duran..
Mine, immaculate dream, made breath and skin, Ive been waiting for you,
Signed, with a home tattoo, happy birthday to you was created for you.
(cant ever keep from falling apart.. at the seams)
(cant I believe youre taking my heart.. to pieces)
Ahh, itll take a little time, might take a little crime to come undone
Now well try to stay blind, to the hope and fear outside,
Hey child, stay wilder than the windAnd blow me in to cry.
Who do you need? Who do you love?
When you come undone.
Words, playing me deja vu, like a radio tune I swear Ive heard before,
Chill, is it something real, or the magic Im feeding off your fingers
(cant ever keep from falling apart.. at the seams)
(can I believe youre taking my heart.. to pieces)
Lost, in a snow filled sky, well make it alright, to come undone,
Now well try to stay blind, to the hope and fear outside,
Hey child, stay wilder than the wind -And blow me in to cry.
yest AB asked me to go accompany her at her office cos got "ghost" then she is the only one left cos she had to finish some proposal .. her office at bukit batok industrial area really quite ulu lah and quite dark at night too.. not safe for lady lah.. worse she was wearing shorts.. piang eh.. felt like scolding her loh but see her so stressed up.. suan le... but really got some recurring strange sound lah which i told her its the aircon lah.. then her colleague apparently saw some unclean stuff before.. tats why all of them usually leave by 8pm.. anw spent the time there studyin.. i taut it will be fast.. in the end she did until 12am!.. but i din complain lah cos AB aldy so stressed.. i will be insensitive if i complained.. instead tried to cheer her up by saying some crap.. haiz.. sometimes i think i am jus too nice..Where's her JT when she needed him?
i think one of the worst things anyone can experience is solitude..like how AB became fearful being alone in her office..of cos all of us need time off from other ppl.. but wat i am saying here is long periods of being alone.. tats why recalcitrant prisoners wif bad behaviour are placed in solitary confinement for days..it can really make u go crazy..i was readin article abt CPIB football corruption suspects being placed in a room alone for hours while being interrogated.. much depression and suicides stem from wild thoughts while being alone..even the Virginia Tech Killer was a loner who shunned away from family and frens.. reminds me of the Tom Hanks ' movie Cast Away when he almost went crazy, being alone on the island.. and had to have a ball as a companion..
Who do you need? Who do you love? When you come undone.
uploaded some fotos..
taken wif LK's hp at easter carnival.. wonder how he is at BMT now
BH conference 3rd day at SIS..borrowed MM's gu niang pink specs cos wanted to look out for my fren then BW asked me to pose..ha.. At lounge, studyin wif CH and AL last sat
Sat.. went to teach AB Maths and Econs at her void deck..aiyo her maths really not good lah.. suppose to cook spaghetti for me like last time.. then this time ximi man bo..thankless job leh..then went sch to pia finish derivatives textbook with CH and AL.. CH too far ahead liao lah..cos his accountant gf recently too busy.. so he no life one lah.. nothing to do .. so only can study.. met one guy from senior batch..din know him but jus started talking..ha.. i'm very sociable one .. he like painted bleak picture.. but its ok.. to me all things will work out good for those who love God..
Sun.. had to count offering in a rush wif FJ b4 svc as din do it on fri cos i din bring the form..the drama during svc was good lah.. comment on that later.. after svc had long talk wif BK.. then rush to give MK and JA bs.. then prayer meetin was good as usual.. then helped ML pay her remaining portion of school fees first cos she had not got her pay from her previous job yet.. met ZW after bs by chance.. then we started to talk abt liverpool plus roma and man u kelong ..ha..plus my studies..long time din talk to him liao.. said he wil be getting married next year.. oh yah by chance on sat nite while pumpin petrol at caltex.. met WL and LY.. long time din see them liao..of cos now they happily married.. last time back in ntu when they got tog i think alot of our frens were surprised..ZW and WL both whom i din talk to for long time say the same thing in less than 24 hrs.. say i too "tiao1" aka picky/choosy.. piang eh.. i where got choosy..
anw a series of things over weekend... good fren shared wif me some stuff plus BK incident plus svc drama plus other things made me think abt somethin i learned b4 in church.. A non decision is already a decision by itself..When someone dun wanna give a clear answer then its already an answer itself.. somethings are best left unspoken
one thing i dun do is to force ppl to accept things they are uncomfortable wif.. and the youths under me know tat i will always advise them on matters and they know wat i said makes sense but ultimately i let them make their own decisions.. jus like BK incident this week.. mayb other leaders will have jus blasted him but tat will only make him more rebellious.. precisely bcos i let him decide on his own after wasting dozens of sms and depleting my hp battery on fri tat he knows i really care for him and not jus want to impose my will on him tat he was willing to sit down and share wif me after svc today..i always believe in them and will encourage them no matter how rebellious and difficult they are..
other than the super funny Hokkien NS guys scene... i think the portion tat i rem abt the drama tat ties in wif wat i have taut abt was when Sandy's character din wanna talk abt her past to her good fren or bf.. of cos the drama unfolds abt the hurt and sorrows she had suffered tat made her close up and unwilling to share wif anyone for fear of being vulnerable or tat her past will not be accepted by her fren and bf..i think tis is really a natural human reaction.. ML was sharing wif me this week abt how she previously also din share wif anyone abt her bullimic and family problems cos she taut ppl dun really care and ppl will see her in a different light if they know abt this..and all these caused her to be really depressed for a long time..
my conclusion is everyone has certain issues related to the past but not everyone can face up to them boldy.. sometimes we wonder why we or others give a non decision or an unclear answer.. bcos tat is precisely the answer already..the person has not been able to confront the real issue..everything else is like creating smoke to cover the real issue.. sometimes when i see ppl's frenster's status being labelled as "Its complicated".. i feel wat i said is the gist of it..true love comes with honest, transparent communication.. yet u can't force this communication like BK and ML and it has to be voluntary.. tats when sometimes letting go instead helps the person sort himself/herself out and comes to terms wif makin a real decison to open up and move on..
only the moment u face up to it and u start opening up to share wif those u can trust tat u realise u have really got over the issue..
jus now led a good cg meeting.. even FJ say it was good..actuali i jus got the sermon today cos CL din email us.. then din really prepare ..the songs.. the verses all did it in a rush at office.. but God is good lah..by His grace i preached and led the whole meeting well.. alot jus spontaneous.. share personal life examples and things i observed which they can identify..think also mayb cos ppl like BK, CC and KC not ard also.. then atmosphere better without them... and prob cos got new fren YS so they are more excited.. anw overrall it was good lah..satisfied
these few days alot of news on the Virginia shooting.. so far i never really commented although alot of thoughts running thru my mind.. i think everyone has faced some form of rejection at some point in life.. if not u will..its how u handle it.. i was jus sharing wif the new fren YS jus now cos i know from ML she used to attend church but left for some reason.. bible says " As a man thinks so is he".. when the opinions of others become more important than yur own opinions of yurself.. then u feel very frustrated cos u can never please everyone.. then u will start feeling rejected cos u dun seem to able to fit into every different opinion..
i was telling YS.. never undervalue yurself due to the opinions of others.. cos when u do so.. u r insulting God who has created u to be a unique individual.. when u think lowly of yurself bcos of wat others say .. then u r insulting this masterpiece of God..the fact tat the killer shot himself in the face to disfigure himself showed he really hated himself and the ppl ard him.. prob due to years of bearing rejection..nobody is borne with tat kind of hatred but i guess it bottled up until to the point of extreme.. tat killing was his form of release albeit a wrong form.. it din help tat he din like to talk..no outlet to vent his frustration of rejection..
jus now HN was sharing wif me abt her problems at home as i gave her lift home after cg..tat night she wanted to call me to share her frustration but i din pick up.. guess i fell asleep again while studyin..i noticed tat this is prevalent esp among gals cos they usually need someone to hear them talk out their problems then they feel better.. guys like me usually jus dun wanna talk abt it.. like i say b4 ..for me i will jus either go sweat it out with a run/swim/gym or jus win some money on stock market..ha.. but all these years have trained me to patiently listen to all the sisters' problems as they talk it out.. ha.. so i am well trained like someone say b4..
anw i feel everyone need an outlet to release his/her frustration..u can't bottle up everythin and stuff it all in.. the result will be an outburst tat is out of control.. in this case 33 lives gone.. and this usually means having a listening ear.. tats why bible says 2 are better than 1 and a 3 fold cord is not easily broken.. but nobody is gg to listen to u complain for the rest of ur lives.. tats when a life partner comes in..God realised tat too and created Eve for Adam..ha
Primary school classmate LT friendster msg me.. then got her hp.. long time no see her liao.. she working at ocbcsecurities.. she got analyst vacancy there.. ha.. forwarded her my resume.. rem last time i always bully her leh.. haiz ..abit guilty now when i think of it.. she say my resume quite impressive leh.. actuali i dun really think so.. alot of ppl much better than me..
yest test was ok although alot of ppl felt slaughtered..i think i am aldy numb to all the exams and tests and projects liao..
on wed i heard somethin tat i was quite unhappy abt but i din really show it.. wun elaborate cos as usual really dunno who may be reading.. i was thinkin wats worse than change?.. its not changing when u keep doing the same thing to no avail and it may not be wat u actuali want..
i think sometimes all of us want to prove something..prove tat we can achieve something.. prove tat we really love someone.. prove tat we still have feelings.. but as Jesus showed on the cross.. there is nothing to prove..
started my earn back process .. made another $100 from Rowsley.. same thing as wat i did for Aztech.. WA was sayin all these are rotational play..like wat i said b4.. some instituional investors and retired ah peks are doing the same thing playing on volatility.. wanted to buy more but my margin tied down by my mistakes in Berlian and Lereno and also cos i had bad records wif the brokerage b4 durin my losses 2 yrs back.. haiz . jus have to earn small first and wait for the chance to offload these 2 slow moving stocks..
took off to study for my test later.. but seems like i am watchin the market more than studyin..ha..
i was jus thinkin abt some stuff this mornin.. i realise selfishness, self-centerness is not exclusive.. meanin if u are selfish sort of person then u r the same to whoever ard u.. irregardless its yur frens or family.. but if u r always puttin others b4 u then no matter who it is, u will do the same.. in the midst of pursuing some gal, some of my frens may seem very selfless, doing alot of nice things for the gal.. but yet its jus an act cos they are really quite selfish in nature from the way they treat others.. then after they have got their gal, their selfishness and self-centerness start to surface and b4 u know it.. its breakup..
i was jus thinkin abt one couple fren who broke up quite long ago.. both guy and gal are my frens lah.. so i not biased towards any party..not talkin abt anyone who is readin this blog eh bro...ha..but all along i know the guy quite selfish one lah.. but the gal taut he was really a good guy so decided to accept him.. in the end then see his true colors.. haiz.. lotsa of stuff can;t take it at face value lah..i think the best way to see a person's character is how he/she treats strangers whom he dunno.. if he/she can treat ppl he/she is not familiar wif well then he/she will treat ppl he/she knows even better..
Jus now decided to sponsor part of CA and ML's SOT school fees.. not that i very rich or bcos they are under me.. i still have my last instalment of school fees and other bills to pay..but i can;t bear to see them struggling financially yet not doing anythin to help them..yah i could have used the extra money to eat better, dress better but wats the point if at the end of the day i drive subaru and dress armani but my fellow brothers and sisters are struggling..
in fact i felt i had not given enuff.. i wish i could have sponsored them more but i got my own liabilities..it is a sacrifice but its ok lah..i can always earn back the money.. i still have 2 hands and 2 legs..
all my life i have always benefited from scholarships except of cos now for my masters.. one day i wish tat i can set up a fund to help poor kids to study.. jus like chinese high founders Tan Kah Kee and Lee Kong Chian.. piang eh still rem we had to read abt their biographies way back then loh..
its a dream but i believe with God all things are possible..
yest received internal email tat i and another dept head are the only ones in the whole organization who din complete some security stuff..paisay lah.. no wonder they keep sendin me email on tat but i always din read then delete liao.. spent 1hr doin it on RO's pc cos mine keep hanging.. now some more black mark liao loh.. more famous liao loh..
exceptionally tired during lesson yest..dunno why leh..gotta keep chewin clorets to stay awake.. mayb no motivation.. nobody to sms to stay awake.. then decided to sms and disturb AB who also have lessons at SIM on tues.. bad mistake.. in the end somehow she manage to make me feel guilty if i dun go and fetch her .. haiz.. end up left the lesson early when CCT half way talking abt career prospects to go fetch her from SIM..
got test tmr.. still haven;t study..gotta improve my GPA..
made a wrong move in stocks just now.. moved in too early..shld have observed a while longer..
ha..jus made another $200 from Yongnam and Aztech.. macham easy money eh.. but alot risk lah.. no risk no gain.. the Aztech one jus took 10 mins.. saw somethin was happening on the counter.. someone was snapping up fast..so i quickly bought in and sell immediately
yest went for run at ntu after work..it was 9pm plus.. abit tired and hungry but disciplined myself to do it anw.. surprisingly my 2.4 and pullup still can "gold" standard.. although i felt quite unfit after lack of exercise for so long..
2 things i will do when i am stressed, dun understand somethings etc.. 1) exercise - nothing beats a good run/swim 2) play the stock market..not tat i very stressed now lah.. jus tat these actvities keep my mind off somethings lah..
i was thinkin yest.. wats God's best for us? All of us will of course make choices that we think are the best for ourselves.. everyone wants to succeed and be happy in life..nobody set out in life to be poor, miserable and lonely.. but all of us at some point in time were so sincerely sure tat we have made a right choice in a certain matter yet we were sincerely wrong in the end and it din turn out as we expected.. but does tat mean God set us up for failure? it can't be.. will a father want to see his own children fail and set them up?.. of cos not unless he is a deranged, crazy father.. and God is definitely not crazy or deranged.. but yet He can;t take away this freedom of choice from his children otherwise he will just have created robots and made everyone worship and believe Him.. He will just have been an autocratic ruler whom his subjects do not really love.. macham Chow Yun Fatt in Huang Jin Jia..
so this makes God's job very difficult.. He can;t force us yet He is trying to make us see it..but like wat i always say in my bs is tat God will always bring u back to the path he intended for u if u continue to trust Him.. no matter how yur choices have deviated from this intended path.. but sometimes even when it become so obvious tat this is wat God is showing you and yet you refuse to acknowledge or take this best He has offered you.. then its another detour/deviation and another long wait before His promise and plans come to pass..
actuali i also dunno why i suddenly think of all these.. its somethin that i always know but jus taut abt it again yest and tis morning..
anw hope i can make more again in the afternoon after lunch.. prob can earn back my $1200 fine very soon..ha..
ha.. earned back $250 from trading Nylect, Lottvis and Thakral these few days.. its peanuts lah i know.. but i dun have the large sum to buy and hold for long term.. will hold up my liquidity..so jus gotta keep playin on volatility of the stocks and buyin large volumes on contra to gain on the small increase.. its a dangerous way of playin.. not advisable for ppl wif poor heart condition.. ha.. somethin happening to Genting today..WA was sayin the Genting stock like woman.. unpredictable ..ha..cannot chase it today when its hot..then i made the mistake of getting Yongnam when i saw large buyin volumes increasing then its false alarm loh unlike Genting.. now its stagnant .. haiz.. hope something trigger it to be volatile again..
jus now met DH from career office at admin building.. she gave me some advice for my resume and for the trader job..
jus playin some songs on guitar..suddely feel tat i abit rusty..
last time used to play for W283 every week plus extra for makeup cg plus other " assignments"like my parents cg.. think i was quite good then.. ha.. got ppl call me shifu one.. nowadays ppl play for me.. so i dun need to play anymore..
actuali i jus like to figure out the chords and keys of songs i hear on radio then play and sing.. got sense of accomplishment..ha..although i dun sing well.. last time way back in N95 days when MJ always ask us help him out at his youth camp.. i rem i and OL always "perform" for them.. OL of cos is piano queen lah.. then they will jus name any song and she tell me the chords and we jus play on the spot.. shuang lah.. i guess it will be good if my wife next time knows piano lah then canplay ourselves..dun need go ktv loh.. ha..
tired.. long day jus now..blog more later in office if have time..
Just now another powerful svc at indoor stadium.. 2 nights there aldy and it jus gets better and of cos more ppl.. those who came 1 hr before svc start could not enter as it was totally filled..later last svc at 4pm will be worse loh.. told my ppl to come at 2.. of cos my faithful MK will get the seats for us..watever i say abt wat happened during svc will be too incredible anw..in fact it will prob get ppl thinking " wu nia bo?" .. so i wun elaborate..u gotta be there to really feel the presence and see the power of God..
sidenote is alot of hyms and old songs which i dunno how to sing but my mum does.. reminds me of when i in pri sch tat i went to the presbyterian church and sunday school at my old house at Pandan Gardens.. those were the days..anw i was thinkin tat whoever taut our church was too modernized would have been shocked if they joined us from other churches these few days for the conference.. cos actuali sometimes we are really traditional.. our pastors all from Anglican background one leh..its a mixed and balance lah.. its just another of the thousands of misconceptions tat ppl have abt us..gotta reach out to the youths and elderly both at the same time mah..Apostle Paul says he is all things to all men mah..
today i was jus thinkin while studyin in lib after lesson b4 svc..am i too passive or am i too secured? An insecure person is usually fearful, stressed but yet bcos of these emotions it will cause him to be active in the things he deems important to him....i rem SL once commented tat i am too passive a leader in church.. at first i was abit upset wif his comment but later when i reflect.. i found some truth in it.. when my youths do somethin wrong.. seldom do i really go and scold them.. which i should to wake up their idle..and i think this passiveness is evident in other areas of my life too.. i rem when i was in sec 1, my chinese teacher taught us the lyrics of this song 潇洒 走一回 by Sally Yeh.. it was a popular song back then.. and i grew up being 潇洒 in the things i do.. subscribing to John Lennon's " Let it be", "there will be an answer" mentality..but along the way this 潇洒 has caused me to lose some impt things, some impt ppl and some precious time.. i guess i have become too rational to show or speak wat i feel..i may joke or say alot abt other stuff but at the end of the day i still din reveal much..
失去了才懂得珍惜.. mayb sometimes i just deceive myself tat it doesn't matter..but perharps it does when i look back few years down the road..
does it really matter? sometimes mayb we ourselves dunno the answer..
When markets are volatile, there are 3 W to observe.. u watch, wait and then u whack!!..SG was telling KWH the whole day he sit at the computer screen jus waitin for tat one moment to arbitrage..now its the same for me as i watchin all the flickering price movements..when nothin is happening.. nothing is really happening.. when somethin happens.. its just plain frenzy..
When waiting, u need to keep an open mind abt other stocks.. cos suddenly out of nowhere there will come some hotshot.. like yest when everyone was watching Nylect.. suddenly CSC came from nowhere..must be some investment house pumping money.. when waiting, there are times that u jus feel like its not gg to hit the price u expect then u change direction sometimes u r correct .. sometimes u r wrong.. u win some u lose some..
when waiting, sometimes u need to take yur mind off and do stuff like blogging ..ha..cos otherwise its gg to be a painful process of seein the price climb and fall back every basis point..
but sometimes after waitin, u know tat the stock is definitely not gg to hit yur target.. then its time to change strategy.. esp when u r buyin on contra on large volumes to gain on small price movements!!
after yrs of doing this.. i realise u can never look back, regret and think wat if.. those are for small time newbies.. life is too short for wat ifs.. if u win.. great.. if u lose.. u move on cos u can always earn it back again..ultimately of cos the big pic is winning more than losing..of cos there are some stocks worth holding on for long term due to their good fundamentals, growth prospects and dividends but that are the rare ones.. and there is a sacrifice of liquidity holding long term but if its worth it then of cos shld hold.. its stressful playing stocks on their volatility.. and ultimately the gains usually cannot be comparable to a good growth stock..
i talkin like expert which i am not.. anw got another job lobang from smu career office..equity trader.. wat i really want leh..its difficult but i wanna try anw.. career office DH asked me to send resume to her for her to beef it up..
话中有话.. its just me lah.. life is more fun and challenging when u need to use yur brain to think thru things and compare analogies..
Jus realised tat HongFok which WA advised me to buy one day 3 weeks ago at SMU toilet had risen ard $0.40 to $1.72 since the last time i checked.. i rem tat i checked its fundamentals in its b/s and i/s were not good so i decided not to buy.. wasted lah.. could have earned another $400 sia..its really a case of price expectations and speculations..Ascendas also .. i wanted to wait for the price to drop to $2.30 but it din .. then after tat it rose all the way... today slightly corrected to $2.45.. now its not a good time for the property stocks since they are really high..but my AdvSCT is showin bullish signs.. hope to sell off soon.. WA today asked me to watch Nylect and Zhongguo Powerplus..
yest nite 3am some crazy fella called our house phone and woke everyone up.. instinctively i took the phone from my dad to answer cos i suspect if it is someone we know it most prob is my call.. could b one of my members.. since last year ard this time somethin similar happened.. ha.. no tis is not from some horror movie.. last yr i rem.. DL called my house phone ard 1 plus in the morning.. something happened to LK..i will spare the details of wat happened.. anw i drove down to DL's house in Gombak to pray for LK and talk to him.. last nite however the guy put down when i picked up.. piang eh.. actually i was not really angry as the call woke me up to see Liverpool game against PSV..ha..saw 1st half.. no goals.. but saw Inzaghi's goal against Bayern on the other channel.. rem i used to quite like Inzaghi and Nedved in Serie A..
set my alarm to wake up at 6 to sms W.. saw her blog yest nite.. she like very pek chek lah.. its really not easy being a teacher.. u want the best for yur students yet they dun realise it and show u attitude somemore.. if i can be so fed up wif my previous tuition kids.. how much more for her when she is taking classes.. haiz.. after smsing her.. i went back to sleep to my usual time..
i realise alot of ppl in my workplace really talked behind my back leh.. mayb its jus those few old fogeys who keep repeatin their tales.. i only talk to my manager KSY abt my transfer yet yest someone who i not very familiar wif.. can;t even rem his name.. came and ask me abt my transfer.. this is crazy lah.. when i ask him where he heard from.. he dun wanna say..then yest before i left office.. my neighbour G also said he heard tat i taking masters in finance . i din even told him abt it before.. must be those tales circulating abt how I am intending to leave this place by taking an unrelated field.. dun care anymore lah.. these housewives can say all they want during their teabreaks.. and ultimately i know the source of these must be of cos KSY.. some good manager he is lah.. not only dun defend me when i kanna attacked by other managers..somemore he himself spread tales abt me..all the best to the new engineers who jus came in.. soon they will realise how fake and lousy KSY is even though he seem very nice on the outside..
after 27 years on this planet.. one golden principle i realise is 人不可貌相.. appearance are really deceitful..appearance not jus in physical looks but in the way the person conducts himself in public..so many examples i have seen of ppl whom i taut are "刀". seem to be anti-social, mayb bad-tempered but actuali they are real, true frens who stick to their word..frens whom u can rely on.. so many ppl tell me i like paikia.. yeah sometimes i also think so too.. ha..but they will know tat i am someone they can trust wif their secrets.. someone who will help them in times of need.. on the other hand there are those who outwardly look very friendly, always saying the right things to please ppl.. can promise the heaven , the sun and the moon but at the end of the day they are those who just empty talk or even the very ones who kicked u when u r down..yet many dun see their true colours until its too late.. haiz.. i may sound cynical and bitter.. nah i am alright.. just have to get used to ppl like this all ard u..
just read an article on this guy call John Arnold who became richest trader at US$1.5 billion after he profited from predicting the correct price movements of oil-natural gas prior to the Amaranth fallout..on average a hedge fund manager and trader earns ard $241 million..
i just need a step in.. i dun believe if SG can get in , why can't me.. i dun believe it can't be done..somethings like career and studies i am just determined and persistent lah.. JL jus sent me another job lobang similar to the JP Morgan one but it involves IT again which i dun want .. cos like wat SYU was telling me.. its difficult to get into front office from there.. then it jus defeats the purpose lah..
just some thoughts.. wats more impt? wat can be seen now or the possibility which can't be seen now?i always believe the journey/process to be more imprtant than the destination.. i read this article abt li ka shing and how he and his wife struggled and cleaved when times were tough.. when his wife died , he set up a foundation in her name.. the reason he loved her so much was bcos she was wif him thru thick and thin and not only when he had made it... so many of the rich and famous like most recently Roman Abhramovic divorced many times bcos they and their spouse had not gone thru the cleaving process tog.. at the end of the day at the back of their minds remain the question if they were in love wif the money/status or with the person ...
poverty and abundance is all in the mind..a person who believes in himself working hard in partnership with God's providance will see his life prosper and flourish..its possible and it can be done..
yest drama lah.. ED wanted to meet up with ML to "clarify".. wats there to clarify? when she din want.. he went to her void deck to wait for her.. haiz ..
most of N280 were at Balmoral Plaza Waffletown to send off CC before he goes to NS today.. met one of CC's fren call PK.. also used to be from RI..seems like many of the guys know him cos he used to join them but left church before i took over N280..anw i missed the turn to newton circus.. and had to exit stevens then go one big round to get to balmoral.. really can't see road signs properly at nite.. i know its dangerous lah but jus dun wanna wear or forget to wear my specs..tats why if u take my car.. u are actually doin me a favour..ha
anw back to the drama.. i only sent MKC to accompany ML home .. of cos i called ED's leader to tell her to ask him to go home..all these while i never wanted to do this cos i believe he will stop wat he is doin.. but in the end he din.. and its gettin bad to worse..i could have gone down myself yest but i din cos if i go down and confront him, it will be very paisay for him..it would have shown that i dun trust him to do what is right..in the end so many of them turned up tog wif ML.. must be traumatizing for him.. i told him tat i din ask them to go down and i myself din go down cos i trusted tat he wun do anythin crazy.. it was a big risk i took yet i know i did right.. cos if i had not given him the chance to say wat he wanted to ML in private.. i could not have won him over and let him know wat i think of the whole thing to convince him wat he did was wrong..this is called 以退为进
i always rem tis thing my principal "lao too"in chinese high used to teach us.. 不变应万变..of cos it cannot be applied to everythin in life but sometimes ppl dun care how much u know or preach.. sometimes they themselves know tat they are in the wrong.. but u give them the chance to discover it themselves by not sayin anythin until necessary.. by now most of my N280 will know i always employ such a tactic.. not bcos i bo chup but they know i respect them as individuals and their decisions.. this past month it happened when WW smsed me he wanted to give up.. it happened in ML-ED case, it happened when XL secretly went out wif the bartender guy..they know when i say sometin to them in private its 话中有话.. and they will know tat i know sometin they are tryin to hide from me.. all these while i jus feel tat God is amazing.. somehow He will always reveal things tat i need to know without me having to ask them..
so i spent the whole of last nite talkin to ED, ML and ED's leader to solve this whole teenage love drama episode.. while i was giving HN lift home after waffletown, she told me abt her bad experience wif some of her stalkers in jc.. as i heard her.. my "bo sim jiu si bo sim" theory surfaces again.. if ppl dun reply yur sms, calls, msn .. means he/she not interested lah.. then why try to make excuses or reasons to justify his/her "bo sim"? the more we try to justify for the person, the more we can't let go.. jus like how ED told me last nite he cannot understand why ML avoiding him.. haiz.. cos she doesn;t want this relationship anymore lah fren.. simple as tat.. no matter wat u try to conjure or clarify or reason out.. its still the same.. i told him if he carries on doing things like this.. then they can;t even be frens which will be a pity..
ED jus smsed me this morning.. say wanna bless ML with money for her school fees.. piang eh.. i almost feel like throwing somethin at him.. the more u sow time, money, effort, the more difficult u will find to give it up..cos u have invested too much.. it reminds of AB who secretly transferred money into JT's account.. and 6 years on.. AB is still hoping for a fairy tale ending when they can't even hold a proper conversation.. haiz.. can she wake up her idle?.. its not gg to work out.. a relationship must be somethin mutual and confortable .. not enforced and sown by just one side..if u are the one who keeps giving, keeps trying while the other person is not doing anythin.. its not gg to work out lah..
haiz.. woke up this morning.. saw ML's sms on her problem with ED.. why my N280 so many BGR problems leh?.. yest nite knew abt XL and the bartender thing.. tat time i taut i got it settled liao.. then now it recurred again..same thing for ML and ED.. then WW and JO thing.. and to a lesser extent MK and Miss Australia.. piang eh..
sometimes abit tired solvin their problems.. not jus BGR.. their studies, family, financial problems etc.. abit like their father.. sometimes i think i know my youths more than their parents and i can nag until the cows come home but yet things are not resolved or they go back to their old ways like BK and CC...
but the hardest part is not this.. its something else.. i dun wanna say it cos ppl may b reading but everytime i think of it, i am not happy abt it..
yest while eatin dinner.. saw this rerun of the movie 江湖 on channel u..not really a great show but i like the song in it..its a sad song 把悲伤留给自己 original by 陈升 but sung in this show by 林苑
the part 林苑 wrote her address and number on 余文乐's back and then left crying.. i felt it was touching lah.. cos 林苑 knew nobody ever really loved her so much like him but yet also she knew she could never see him again cos he was gg to kill someone and may not come back alive..
yest saw JC so many times during both services cos she was ushering the same area my cg was sittin in both services..sometimes dunno wat to say when i see her also..cannot be too friendly and yet cannot be too dao..
MM responded to altar call durin last service..solid lah.. last service had the least ppl in overrall attendance.. 1/3 of the hall not filled..worse than prayer meetin.. yet the most ppl responded.. i think Pastor also abit shocked..God works in amazing ways lah..
i think everyone had great time of fellowship at the carnival.. i treated N280 to $40 of coupons which they mostly used to buy food.. then ZG started tellin some army ghost stories cos CC gg in tmr.. later we havin a dinner at newton circus to send him off..i think i will get a cap for him lah.. not sure he will wear it cos he aldy botak now anw.. even though CC is one of the more rebellious in N280.. i always believe in 以德服人..
AT suddenly called me yest while i was on the way home after carnival..she jus came back tat morning from her shanghai-tokyo trip..i told her tat next time she go rob a bank.. let me join in too.. ha..piang eh. dun understand how come she so much money to do alot of stuff.. she student only leh.. sometimes appear magazine and those roadshows can earn so much leh..ask me wait jurong point for her.. accompany her get some stuff.. haolian to me abt her photos in the Hotstuff magazine.. ok lah .. look quite nice.. except dun smile looks abit fierce lah..
last nite fell asleep while readin sat newspapers in my room.. tats how tired i am .. slept total of 8 hrs over fri and saturday.. still quite tired today..
today finally handed up the tedious convertible bond projects.. left smu at 1am yest.. drove CH home..he wanted to give me lunch treat today.. told him no need lah.. if like tat then alot of ppl need to treat me liao..came back school 7hrs later..in the end AL's answers for the project all diff from everyone's answers..told AY suan le.. if fail then the other grps also fail lah..
finallygot my grades for last term back yest.. ABB.. ok lah.. average.. my 1st semester 1st term still the worst..could not adapt to the change to juggle studies and work then..now my capacity enlarged liao.. sleep less.. do things faster.. study more..
just now came home.. got a shocker.. actuali expected it abit when my parents changed some arrangement in the living room.. its a new 42 inch Panasonic Flatscreen!!!its really very big! now my living room really abit like mini movie theater loh..the colour in my old tv has been abit problematic for past few months.. finally my parents decided to change but i din expect so big loh..my mum is abit of a TV and book addict so i guess she now even more addict loh..my bro jus reach home from airport from Philippines.. he quite power lah.. go there preach to church.. he also shocked by the new tv..
jus now went expo wanted to meet up with WW's fren J and HN's fren ZF before service but in the end reach there svc started liao..so din meet.. then coincidentally met YB who came service alone.. recently he changed number tat even MK could not contact..ha.. God is good lah..talk to him awhile then went off to find 259 upper thomson road
dinner wif W at coffee club ..then jus walk ard taka and wisma..like i say she is smart..well read..learn from her abt kafka ..some marquez issit..deep snow plus others lah which i can't rem..piang eh amazed at the books she read..i only read textbooks on Equities, bonds, futures, swaps plus bible and newspapers loh... i hardly ever walk shopping centers..always jus work, studies and ministry but actuali today i felt very destressed jus to tag along as she jus walk ard to buy chocolate, buy shoes..dunno why lah but thanks anw..
2am.. gg sleep liao..tired lah.. slept 3hrs yest nite.. think i was abit stone wif W jus now at times..paisay lah.. tmr another long day.. gotta fetch parents down for 10pm svc then later attend wif N280 130pm svc.. then bring the frens go the carnival..YH jus sms me say he attended our svc wif his gf..
Yeah and Liverpool win 2-1 Reading.. not very glorious lah but i think pennant cross headed in by kuyt was superb..
Piang eh.. public holiday long weekend but i even more busy than usual loh..
now 12am.. still in smu lib doing my class project on the ST convertible bond loh.. haiz .. but at least it is almost done liao.. CH still struggling.. my housewives Charlie's Angels all really cooperative.. we hardly ever meet up yet amazingly everyone always so willing to contribute and not be a free rider.. CH and AF were jus complaining abt their own group members pushing the work ard..
Early morning came lib then afternnoon wentconcourse bought some stuff for CL's bdae celebration for zone.. then rush down to service.. thank God MK manage to keep a seat for me.. JA and fren could not enter cos came late and hall and overflow room were all filled liao .. our church easter drama as usual power one loh.. this year the backdrop setting very nice.. focus was on how Jesus grew up as a normal person, with his friendship with John the Baptist until he discovered his purpose and destiny.. as usual every year got a funny spoof.. this year was the "fast and prayer(furious)" part...super funny sia..
then after tat zone bdae celebration for CL.. the card that CA and HN did for our cg gift to her and the salad were good lah.. i think our card got the most standard of all the cg.. CA really did a great job although along the way she keep pn complaining to me..
then came back sch to do proj.. din join the other leaders to chill out wif CL.. lunch and dinner all not taken loh..tats how stressed and bo eng me and CH are.. CH at least got his cigarettes and gf encouragement to motivate him.. i got nothin loh.. suan le..
My hp died again.. gg to use my backup..
anw the job offer on thu din go well.. the salary was lower than expected.. after negotiaition it still not meet my expectation.. aldy told him i got bond liability to fulfill if i join them.. suan le.. there will definitely be something better.. my mentality in everythin is tat there shld be mutual sincerity, if after all tat i expressed abt my keenness yet they are not willing to up it to wat i put across then forget it..
Barclays.. call me leh.. why so long no reply..haiz..
Win #1:Forgot to mention in previous entry tat liverpool won PSv 3-0 in champions league.. ha.. solid lah.. saw the goals on ESPN replay last nite while eatin dinner at 12.. was half dead by then but seeing the goals.. i revitalised again..ha.. risse's long shot power sia..CH was predicting liverpool will lose by 3-0.. then in the end its the other way round..
Win #2 : this morning just receive job offer for the investment analyst post.. yeah.. i knew i did well in the interview.. all the stuff i learn abt DDM, FCFE, FCFF, convertibles all came to good use..and my chinese of cos.. gg to meet the director in abt an hr time.. i aldy got an amt in mind for salary and really hope they offer tat amt and of cos better if more..
Win # 3 : finally discovered how to do the binomial tree model .. did the stock price one just now.. roughly know how to complete project liao.. tks to CH and LV.. but still gotta do the report..haiz..this project is so far the most xiong of all our projects cos it is just so difficult.. harvard business school assignment loh.. was tellin LV must take pride..we SMU loh..ha
yest SY confronted me abt my request to transfer department.. it was abit unpleasant.. some of the things he say really too much.. dun wanna dwell too much on it.. but all i wanna say is that if he rather believe wat another dept manager say abt me and make no effort to defend me..his subordinate.. then he is not a boss worth working for.. for all the new guys who jus came in.. very soon they will realise like me and KWH that this dept has too many old forgeys who are just concerned with playing politics to keep their rice bowl and get the most of perks like overseas trips without any intention to help or groom the younger engineers.. after almost 3 yrs .. i and KWH are jus disillusioned and waiting to leave.. actuali i am almost quite happy i can leave even it is jus internal transfer.. i know those old fogeys sure gg to talk behind my back.. and true enuff.. jus now KWH told me he knew from LK abt my talk with SY even though i din tell anyone.. they really nothin better to do then to talk behind ppl during their tea break loh.. no wonder ppl outside say abt our long teabreaks which i hardly go during my 3 yrs here unlike those old foggeys..
ok let it out liao.. relac.. hopefully pray tat investment analyst job comes thru .. then it is adios..
today busy tryin to figure out abt my black scholes model and binomial tree valuation for my project.. later gg sch meet CH and LV to discuss.. then gg zone meeting then gg back sch to discuss again.. then go home gotta call ED to settle his issue with ML.. piang eh..another xiong day for me..
i am busy but never too busy for ppl who are impt to me..
yest i donated $1200 to HDB to reward their efficient parking attendants.. haiz..
quite an experience.. appear before judge..b4 tat.. i was super angry yest cos i was cut twice at the parking lot.. 6pm subordinate courts is the time where all the traffic paikias of singapore congregated cos this is the time all the traffic offences are dealt wif.. both paikias who cut me really simply bo chup cos i was aldy half way reversing in then they jus went in.. i really wanted to get out of my car and give it to them loh but behind got queue of cars..in the end running late so jus park double yellow in front of subordinate court..haha.. paikia right..
anw i was one of the earliest but waited until the court almost cleared.. while waitin.. i see all sorts of pattern.. the super blur sotong kind.. dunno wats gg on.. the chao paikia kind who wanna argue wif the judge and prosecution officer.. the 可怜 kind who really dun have money to pay and had to support family etc.. after seein how others did it.. i got it aldy.. first u gotta plead guilty to the statement of facts .. then PO recommends fine amt..then in mitigation u plead for leniency to judge.. i.e i am very sorry for wat i did.. i will not do it again etc.. then judge reduce amt usually by half.. a little drama occurred when its my turn cos the Prosecution Officer lost my statement of facts and gotta ask to borrow from the judge so mine took a little longer than usual.. then in the end i gotta pay an extra $200 instd of the usual $1000 after mitigation cos mine was warrant case.. wanted to plead against the warrant but they aldy called for next case.. then i had to sit in the dock to wait somemore.. also dunno for wat.. macham to 面壁思过
while 面壁思过.. i saw drama of this lady who plead guilty but wanted to dispute some of the facts.. so judge was sayin.. she can;t plead guilty and still argue.. its a boolean.. either yes or no.. if no then she has right to claim for trial.. which gotta be arranged again.. altogether she was told to stand down 3-4 times to consider and each time she come back still defiant until judge say " for the 25th time tonight i am asking u again do u plead guilty to statement of facts?" aiya..judge aldy wanna rush home eat dinner, watch tv wif her kids lah.. then this lady wasting time only loh..
actuali wanted to take foto of myself in the court or ask an officer to help me take...kiddin..anw i not poor until need to eat grass ..only eat air lah..ha.. money can always be earned back..jus few more good stock picks and i will get it back..sounds optimistic sia.. i like wat pst mark conner say on sunday.. none of us like to watch reruns of bad movies.. yet if we keep playin back bad memories or living in self pity and complaining then we are just like replaying our own bad movies in high definition and surround sound.. ha..very true.. so gotta be positive in every situation..tats why i always practise selective amnesia..ha
then went ntu lib to do abit on my convertible bonds project.. saw this msn name " My Life paints my neighbour's picture of God".. Dulux, ICI or Berger? ha.. but its a good quote..she's actually quite smart..mayb lose abit to me only lah..hahahah..
jus now went OUB center building for interview.. was made to translate and write 2 English written articles into chinese..was abit shocked initially cos not written chinese for a long while..but i guess i did alright.. afterall i chinese high one leh..foundation strong sia..ha.. forgot how to write 贸易.. after interview while driving back then i rem.. but i think i did well lah..they need ppl who are strong in chinese right now cos expanding into china.. gone were the days when being cheena was despised sia.. during my time i rem it was more cool and useful to go to schools like RI and ACS.. chinese high? ppl will jus think forget it.. i still rem the top 5 PSLE scorers in my pri sch.. only i did not go to the Rafflesian family loh..anw during the interview the guy keep askin me why i wanted to go into investment banking.. the lady was quite fascinated how i manage to juggle so many stuff.. told her jus have to sleep less and do things more effectively..ha..
later gg to face the music at subordinate courts.. finally.. to settle the parking coupon issue.. almost one year liao.. din realise i din tell KWH abt it all these while.. he said i really paikia lah.. internally breach company security .. then outside also got offense.. like i say.. i live exciting life mah..no risk no gain..yest mum kept naggng me abt not to be late for interview and court hearing..
yest chop chop gave JA bs.. he shared wif me that his parents were on talking terms now unlike the first few years of divorce when they never spoke.. JA was sayin that his dad who used to be a LTC in army.. had a bad temper which caused the divorce.. hiaz.. like i say b4 divorce is a sad thing.. traumatic for the children..sad for the adults.. i will never want it to happen in my life..
then tog wif MK rush down to join rest of N280 at swensen where they using the voucher which they won durin 食字路口.. which was actually effectively sponsored by yurs truly..then went new york-new york to join the other zone ldrs to celebrate CL and ML's bdae which is the same day this comin week...i had to do a commando.. flank to the side to hide CL's present at counter cos CL taut we were only celebrating ML's bdae.. the waiters and waitressess miscued.. came to sing bdae song and present cake when ML go toilet.. super full by 6pm.. din join E and GK at Muthu's curry ..went home changed and then went ntu for a run.. told AT i can;t find her hotstuff magazine yet lah.. must be too hot.. ha.. she also very dare one lah.. ownself go tokyo explore.. can;t even speak proper japanese.. young gals nowadays.. hiaz..
WA gg Hongkong wif his gf this thu over the easter holidays.. happy sia.. thinkin where shld i go for holidays after my May exams..hmm.. anyone any suggestions?
in the end the test was open book.. din even know it until jus b4 the test.. but i guess its better to overstudy than understudy..
piang eh the lecturer's notes really cmi leh.. so in the end had to put aside my pride and succumb to crowd pressure to buy the text.. $72!! can u imagine.. i have never bought a book so ex in my life so far loh.. title is called futures, options and swaps.. they think those in finance very rich like the traders right..
then project after dividing i got to do qn 3.. at first it looks ok to me then as i try to figure out in the lounge.. i realise its not easy loh.. then 2 other grps also in the lounge and they are all doin qn3 .. they were shocked tat my grp only i doin when they were all concentratin on tat question.. haiz.. i know it was not intentional.. we jus underestimated tat question when we glanced thru.. then qn1 which was the easiest had CT and WW both doing.. cannot be lah.. sent email to the gals liao.. gotta reorganize our work division..
yest AT sms me from shanghai.. ask me go buy Hotstuff cos she inside.. later i go and buy lah..
jus now b4 i came up to lounge..went to get my stuff from the car.. saw this lady parkin the car.. looks pretty but thats not the main point.. then we waited for the same lift.. when it came.. the lights were off..somethin seem not right and the lift din move.. then we started talkin as we went to take another lift..din ask for her name though when we parted.. jus another chance encounter with meinu..
ladies and gentlemen.. foto below is me at postgrad lounge at smu.. my study place on saturdays..the view is actually quite nice.. behind is stamford house where former MPH is..last time when i young i always go there to buy asterix and tintin comics sometimes all of us need a little motivation.. but i can't seem to find it..i taut it could be but it isn't.. haiz.. jus have to move on..
Very dry lah.. studyin eurodollar futures.. i think its the lecturer's notes and it doesn;t help when he is not following the main text syllabus.. doesn't explain the calculations and i din attend lesson yest.. thank God CBT not tested.. else xiao liao loh..
难得 i friday nite free then gotta study for test all bcos those ppl voted for it loh..haiz.. 算了 take it that exam no need to piah so hard then .. still got bond project not started.. AY always very relac one leh..
Just now went for church wide prayer meet.. basically i felt alot of stuff spoke to me durin pm..but everythin ties in together..
anw lets start wif when i came home.. it was ard 1130pm..as i ate dinner..i saw this travel show call 稀游记 wif belinda hosting.. no wonder long time she din appear in church for harvest highlights liao..she went to find for this guy call Ravi.. at 1st i was thinkin who is this Ravi..then it went on to reveal how he gave up everythin he had as an engineer in singapore to set up 3 orphanages in different parts of India.. how he take homeless children off the streets one by one to help them kick their addiction to glue and put them to school or help them learn skills like sewing..after 8 years in India.. he currently supports ard 130+ children wif aid from humanitarian organizations.. it may not seem alot but every child he saves.. its just like schindler's list.. every person makes a difference..even as belinda was revealing her experience wif Ravi, she was tryin hard not to cry but she can't help but break down seeing the work this man is doing.. i was also very touched..
how does this tie in wif wat spoke to me durin church prayer meetin? no sermon was preached .. no message given but yet in the midst of it all God spoke most powerfully.. today we like sang the "Thank You" song over and over many times but yet it was never enough..and i guess what i was debriefing N280 and W426 after cwpm sums it up best..What has God done for you and what have you done for God in return?
even as our ppl in the missions field, in taiwan, in china are working so hard.. wat are we doing back here in Singapore.. in our home base? wif 22,000 ppl, we are large but how many of us really see ourselves not jus another in the crowd but like a Ravi?
i always believe u have a responsibility for wat God has given you.. the difference between u and someone else less privileged in any 3rd world country is tat God has borned u into where u are..and if u lived life just consumed in yur own pursuits.. without having used wat u have.. be it yur finances, ur brains,ur talents, ur skills, ur social/political position watever.. to make any difference in anyone's life, how are u gg to answer to God on judgement day?
U may not be a Ravi to give up everythin u have to go to India.. but u can definitely contribute some finances to the causes of ppl like Ravi.. which brings me to wat i said b4 in a previous entry long ago.. ppl always think our church is big and rich.. why do our ppl still tithe and give so much?. but do they rem tat the money dun fall from the sky.. it comes from ppl willing to give..and most of it jus pass thru our hands.we dun have a reserves fund like the Singapore government...it goes to all our tsunami restoration work.. when other NGOs had gone back on their promises but we din..all our orphanages in sri lanka and india.. all our schools in china.. all these need money..and many dun realise tat Sun's royalties go to these schools.. many dun realise tat she even gave her 3rd album royalties to Ren Ci.. none of this is published.. yet when she tries to counsel sexual abuse victims in taiwan by revealing her own experience.. its all over the papers and she is condemned in her own hometown in Singapore but praised in Taiwan for her courage to step out to help others..wat wrong is it for pastor to set up Skin and Ed Hardy if the money the rich used to buy their clothes can be used to fund social projects like "Soccer for the blind"?
I rem when i was young, whenever i watched those documentaries on the hungry children in India or Ethopia.. i always ask God why am I so fortunate to be where I am..it spurred me on to study hard because i told myself i must do well in my studies to succeed in life to help those not as fortunate as me.. bcos i wanna 报恩 to God..
today God reminded me again.. every minute that i spent to lead N280 is not a burden on my studies or career.. i am making a difference in their values and faith..every dollar that i give is doing a work far beyond wat i myself can do.
today God reminded me He can use and raise up anyone whose heart is for Him.. i can't set up orphanages like Ravi, perform like Sun or preach like Pastor to make a difference but is it too difficult for God to raise me up in the finance sector jus like he did for bro Eng Han at Statestreet..like MY in Stanchart.? Just like he did for Elim Chew for 77th Street, for the husband and wife behind spectacle hut? Just like he did for the Taiwan ambassador and South African Ambassador?
God is not a respecter of persons.. if he did it for them, he can do it for me.. the faithful shall eat the good of the land.. I will work hard and do my best.. and God,You will do the rest
yest finally sold my SPC shares and made $200.. i taut it will be a short haul but in the end the fall in oil prices previously made this investment longer than expected.. tied up my liquidity.. nvm suan le.. markets are unpredictable..realise u can never pick top or pick bottom thru technical analysis like wat i used to believe.. sure i win alot in the beginning but later it got me into my hugh contra losses 2 years ago.. its a myth and fantasy thinkin by the young and reckless.. 见好就收..the one word that caused ppl to lose alot is 贪.. greed.. u always think it will rise higher.. even if it does.. there is no such thing as "what if" when u buy or sell.. u make a call and u stick wif it..like wat my lecturer EC told us ..u can only start winning after u have lost.. its really true..only when u have lost badly b4 then u understand the importance of things like discipline to cut losses, patience to wait and ai zai not to let short term mkt sentiments affect yur valuations..wah.. think i can write book liao..
got AdvSCT and hope to get AscendasReit on correction.. both i feel after readin their P & L , balance sheets and seeing their price trends.. have potential to rebound strongly.. of cos i can do all the fair price valuations using DDM, FCFF, FCFE etc but thats jus too troublesome.. i always believe there's money to be made anywhere.. i read abt the jewish guy.. forgot his name.. who is zhang ziyi's latest boyfriend.. he is one shrew investor who started from scratch but somehow he manages to use his valuation techniques to make the right investment choices and become the low profile multi millionaire tycoon he is today..
IN jus came into my cubicle and passed me foodstuff from taiwan.. she always go hongkong, taiwan, korea all these places.. still rem last year when we went Paris for work.. she like go crazy when we went to the LV shop loh.. then when we went the Eiffel tower n Notre dame i guess she was thinkin how good if her bf was there wif her instead of me..haha...
read an article today.. inside there's a statement..What you focus on , you will attract.. rem wat casey treat was sayin abt his bike accident.. tat he was mentally tellin himself to avoid the rock he saw but bcos he was focusing on it.. his bike hit it.. its jus like wat i was tellin XL and MK before.. if they keep prayin God help me forget XX and move on then actually u are already making yourslef remember him/her.. instead u should pray God help me to focus on somethin or someone else.. its jus like u can only replace a bad habit by a good habit or replacing a negative thought with a positive one..there can never be a void.. its either u fill it with good stuff or bad stuff..
the article was abt this counsellor advising this lady.. its somethin i heard b4 in church.. if u keep telling yurself things like i will never be like my mother who is so naggy etc.. guess wat.. u will beome luo suo yurself..or if u mentally tellin yurself all men are unfaithful.. guess wat.. u will get an unfaithful partner even though u know he is one..tats why when u hear alot of sad love songs on breakups, u r steering yurself for bad relationships tat will not last.. its a warped but its true bcos yur mind moves towards yur vision and yur vision is enhanced by the thoughts and voices u allow to linger..
These few days Telok Blangah hill carpark 1 aving some construction work so parking really limited.. no choice have to park at danger zone opp workplace..
on monday.. jus as i was still fuming over the guy who cut me to the car park lot on the hill, i stepped out and saw fatimah.. at 3 cars beside me.. quickly drove off back up the hill and park at bus lot.. close shave 1
on tues.. 4pm.. i suddenly had permonition of fatimah attack again.. no kiddin.. cos i rem on monday i saw her close to 4.. so i rush over to multi storey.. up the stairs.. i saw fatimah comin down.. pass by her.. glared at her.. she macham guilty .. din dare look back.. i thought xiao liao loh.. when i reach level 3B.. all the cars ard were booked.. mine was at the end.. prepared for the worst cos i know my coupon din last until 4.. but Praise the Lord.. dun have leh.. i was tellin my colleagues either she liverpool fan or she met quota liao.. ha.. close shave 2
anw here's me relieved and still in one piece after 130 incident last night..
today received email from RH tat he ROM liao then give us link to his multiply and blog of his ROM fotos and their love story.. RH um um lah.. din say anythin then suddenly marry .. even faster than TH loh.. but anw really happy for him.. congrats bro! he and his wife look really happy.. shuai ge mei nu.. always rem the days back in NS when i and RH were monday slacker buddies..ha
yest got dept staff lunch at this dim sum restaurant call dragon restaurant or somethin.. quite nice lah.. ate until really full..
tried out my fren's specs.. look abit chao lao lah..
haiz..Just now almost accident on the way home after lesson..
1045pm.. civic turns into CTE tunnel onto AYE towards jurong.. silver lexus appears from nowhere onto 2nd lane beside civic.. paikia steps accelerator.. dun want lexus to overtake.. rounds bend near delta.. 130km/hr!! civic really very near guard rail, paikia slightly lose control, heart skip a beat, slams brakes, civic slows, lexus cuts in, paikia loses but thank God he is alive..
smsed SYS after the ordeal cos sometimes after lesson. her car will drive beside mine for fun on empty AYE as she also stay jurong..but today she stayed behind after lesson to discuss project..say i was crazy to be driving 130 around the bend.. i also think so.. but that lexus guy was too fast too furious loh.. after he overtook me.. i really eat his dust.. in no time i could not see him liao..maybe Schmaucher came Singapore..ha
blog abt the rest later lah.. quite late liao..wanna read up abit for my derivatives test this sat b4 go to sleep.. after lesson actuali had funny thought of buyin vitamin c and driving to bishan.. but in the end decided not to lah.. why am i so concerned?
this is a flippant generation.. over one sunday i saw 3 examples of ppl who dun honour wat they say.. like someone who was telling me.. they can promise u the sky... in the end its just mere talk.. dun wanna talk more abt who or what.. cos i aldy cooled down .. i dun even bother askin them anymore.. i was telling MK during bs that even if others are like that, we will not be like that.. yest nite durin dinner saw re run of twins effect on tv and edison was telling charlene sayin that a man shld honour his words cos edison who was some vampire was all covered up to avoid the sun so that he can meet her in the day.. honouring yur words means even if u have to inconvenienced yurself, rearrange yur schedule etc, u will still fulfil wat u promised others cos u aldy promised someone.. of cos if really unforeseen circumstances crop up or u have aldy tried yur best and things cannot be helped then its forgivable.. but not if time over and over again u go back on wat u said without even trying.. how can others trust u in the future? yur character and integrity is just not there..
there are times when i really regretted telling someone i will do somethin for him/her.. but i will still do it.. be it giving someone a lift.. helping someone wif their homework..running some errands.. e.g like helpin AB wif her maths and econs.. i get nothing out of it but bcos she failed last sem and i promised to help her.. even when she attitude.. make me wait to get her textbook then black face still.. sorry also din say.. i really feel like telling her to go and study herself wif this kind of u-owe-me attitude but cos i promised her.. i still lun4 and hope to get it over and done wif..
tis morning itself i woke up earlier than usual to send my mum to NUH cos she gg some workshop.. although mum was very good.. she knew tat i had not much rest over the weekend and told me to sleep longer and she will take bus there herself but i told her cannot.. i aldy promised her.. since tat memorable incident many years ago tat mj blasted me abt being a man of my word.. its become one of my principles.. i will do wat i say i will do..
yest evening helped AM pass a gift to AT so that she can pass to her sister in Shanghai when AT flies over today.. actuali wanted to go back school to finish up reading for my assignment but cos i promise AM so in the end gotta rearrange my schedule..accompany AT go Chameleon buy false eyelashes.. dun know such things existed..ha.. then liberty to buy some eggs and butter cos she gg make cookies to give her sister.. AT said she will be appearing in some Hotstuff magazine next month.. asked me to rem buy..yeah i will rem..
went ntu to exercise after that.. think i gettin unfit..
and the jam this morning was terrible.. took us one hr to weave thru jurong east and clementi to get to NUH.. along the way as usual i was cuttin lanes here and there.. think mayb my mum say she wanted to take bus cos she also scared to take my car lah...ha...
JL jus called.. say DC found someone more suitable for the post at JP Morgan.. haiz .. sad but DC intro me to his wife who is workin at Barclays.. JP asked me want anot? of cos want lah.. Many of my classmates gg for the 6 mth Temasek internship.. i would have gone too if i am not bonded.. was telling AF on sat tat in the near future i can;t possibly go back government linked places like temasek or GIC if i leave or break bond..
Not the cars but convertible bonds.. chim lah.. today in my half zombie mode.. could not catch alot of stuff.. slept 4 hrs only tis mornin.. actually not the worse.. the worst was the time PLAB unloading.. work until 4.. went home sleep 2 hr plus b4 gg for lessons.. almost din wanna go but had to discipline myself..
last night cg.. alot of stuff din go well.. ML din play well cos WW went for strikeforce performance..actuali i really wanted to take over but i know that will hurt her self esteem..like i always tell new guitarists long time ago when i first started playin.. mj who was my cgl then took over half way.. i was super demoralised then but picked myself up to become good..i still encourage her anw..felt FJ was abit tough in evaluating her.. then as usual CC and his bro KC attitude one.. then so many ppl late.. then countenance very bad.. but i think i still lead n preach well based on all the circumstances.. alot of things i say jus came spontaneously but it came out good..it comes to the point that i dun really care abt all the unfavourable stuff ard and jus be natural..its the same thing for gg to interviews or talking to strangers..sometimes gotta have a bo chup reckless paikia attitude otherwise u will jus be too nervous and fouled up...
in school catching up on readin my text for bonds and derivatives.. wat a way to spend my sat afternoons.. suppose to do project but my "Charlie's Angels" all got their husbands and families .. where got time to spend sat afternoon wif me to discuss.. haiz..
gg to take a short nap on the library couch first.. tired lah..
High Casualty Rate during yest lesson on derivatives .. the lecturer got substance but he talks abit too slow lah...abit bedtime story.. then my "Charlie's Angels" CT and WW boldly walk out when lesson not yet finish.. think their husbands come and fetch them lah.. CH was commentin that my grp mbers all very hiong ( aka brave + bo chup).. other than those 2 who dare to walk out non discretely..got one AY who is super mother.. morning take care of kid then at night during lesson still so alert to fire intelligent questions.. ha.. yeah man.. like that the only guy me in the group is the most "demure" of them all loh..ha
yest PrimePartners called me for another round interview.. asked me for this morning but i told them cannot so change to 2nd april.. the same day i had to go court to pay fine for my coupon thing.. might as well..
yest called WW and give it to him.. suppose to give me forecast at 9pm then give me 2 hrs later at 11pm despite my reminder and he din get all the info right either and he din even apologise thru it all..HN also din provide all the info i needed.. totally no sense of responsibility.. ML is the only one who is consistent and accurate.. i dun wanna be so harsh and in fact i seldom ever hound or scold them and dun like to do so but if nothin is done they will keep thinkin it is alright to be late, sloppy and doing the bare minimum.. grace also has its limits lah..if they were under AM or SL, think they will have got it even much worse loh..ok at least they all acknowledge the long sms and apologise except for WW.. i still will be nice.. will sayang them when i see them loh..
din know YH got read my blog also.. he became christian ah.. surprising leh bro.. KW also.. tat time last in camp training KW told me.. funny lah u all.. last time i always reach out to u all.. invite u all.. also dun want.. must be power of love lah.. ha..
yest went for this MBTI session and test at SMU.. took the quiz.. so I am an ESTP.. Extraversion, Sensing, Thinking and Perceiving.. while the animated Office of career services lady R was gg thru..i taut i was a ENFP.. N for intuition and F for feeling.. but in the end after tabulating my quiz answers.. i am not wat i think i am.. CT who was sittin beside me say i dun even know myself.. she was really ENFP like she taut she was..yeah man mayb i schizophrenic sia..ha
But A who left early same time as me.. we were discussin tat its abit inaccurate.. i feel personality tests are never totally accurate.. cos everyone is partially of something cos God created all of us unique.. all of us are grey of certain qualities and characteristics.. no black or white.. it is just a good gauge..personality tests are just like horoscope.. it will definitely be true to a certain extent for some people.. law of large numbers.. bound to hit someone on the spot..
went riverwalk for ldrs meetin wif CL.. as usual gave FJ lift home.. encouraged him to take up degree course at SIM.. i felt its more worthwhile in the long run compared to CHFC..
Today i realise KWH got larger increment than me.. i am happy for him but yet felt unfair.. but there is never fairness in the 1st place.. from the time KWH got to go France for course and when i heard the new guy AS gg U.S.A instead of me.. i aldy know my boss KSY doesn't quite like me.. this was further compunded by my security breach issue..after self examination i know there were times i din match up to his expectations.. i can sit around and complain abt things but i won't cos it is not gg to help anw.. made me more determined to either change dept or break bond.. FJC's boss called me yest again to ask me if i gg over his dept.. he is quite persistent.. feel at least if i go over.. i will get appreciated.. told him i will come over in july after the bonus and increment..gotta try to finish the loose ends of my current project at least.. even if KSY treats me badly .. i will still be responsible for what is mine..
saw CSK and he told me KSY was askin where i disappear to last week and he dun rem i applied leave.. piang eh.. i applied leave to KSY and he was the one approved one leh..when ppl biased against u.. anythin also can say lah..算了，one of my policy in life :人家气我，我不气，如果生气中他计.. the whole series of incidents "motivated" me to send more resumes.. sent one to RBS, one to Julius Baer and one more to the JPMorgan guy to "remind" him..i feel that even if bad things in yur job, relationships occur.. u just gotta keep moving.. life is too short to sit around and lament yur fate and complain abt unfairness.. God moves when you move..
ha.. even as i typin this.. FJC's boss called me again .. asked me to start applyin online cos the whole transfer process gg to take at least 3 mths..then JL called me say the JP Morgan guy still interviewin others.. next week will know the results.. yeah.. gotta keep moving.. no complains.. no regrets..
the movie 300 is nice loh.. yest went wif E to see at cineleisure.. the fighting scenes were power..the dialogue was good..i like those kind of dialogue话中有话.. ha.. makes the other person tio insulted also dunno like how Leonidus and his queen keep insulting their enemies e.g The queen was tellin the persian messenger.."Only Sparta women give birth to real men"..ouch..
dun wanna reveal too much..but somethings i felt from the movie..Leonidus could have easily bowed to Xerxes.. got nothin to lose and seemingly everythin to gain.. but yet he chose the difficult path..i guessed it spoke of conviction versus convenience..the hunchback spartan spoke of the pain of rejection and how it can change someone's values.. the captain and his son spoke of how much a son longs for approval from his father..and the finale spoke of 至之此地而后生..good movie must not only make u wowed by action but must make u think wat it is tryin to say.. of cos like wat most ppl sayi feel there is a little of the undertones of the ongoing U.S war against terrorism
on sunday.. pst phil was mentionin somethin abt when men think...they go 123, ABC..logical sequence but woman usually go 1, w, A, 2, z... then they cry.. ha.. it was funny when he said it.. not meant to be an insult but jus sayin that woman tend to be emotional..yest i heard another story that proves the point.. i wun say anythin abt this story but it is so similar to another story i heard 3 years ago..
since it was 3 years ago and now my fren is going to marry someone else.. its ok to mention it.. anw he is open abt it.. my FYP partner then who is also my good fren in church.. QY had been tog wif his gf for 3-4 yrs .. alamak can't rem her name.. call her X lah..they were like the perfect couple..very loving.. both were very nice ppl.. QY was preparin to marry her as soon as he grad while she was aldy a teacher..
then somehow she got very stressed wif work.. she felt QY could not inderstand her.. got to know this PE teacher in a school camp and this PE teacher although he knew she was attached then.. still went ahead to chase her.. give her alot of attention.. then things started to get ugly.. X started to avoid QY.. even to the extent of being uncontactable by everyone else .. then one day QY caught X and the PE teacher at her void deck holding hands and being physically close.. he waited for the guy to leave before approaching her and sayin that they break up.. he din want to but he knew X wun do it.. so he gotta be the one to be brave and face the facts and say it.. i can almost feel QY's heartbreak when he was tellin me.. 4 years of love not equivalent to 1 month of attention by this 3rd party.. X left church becos she knew she had shocked everyone ard her for her betrayal of QY..
X was wif the PE teacher for less than a year.. today she is back in church.. i still see her ard.. i heard QY still got talk to her.. QY recently jus propose to his present gf on valentine's day and she accepted .. ha .. heard his proposal went thru trials and tribulations sia.. ha.. but i wonder how does X feel abt her relationship wif QY.. wat it could have been..if she had not been emotional then.. i knew QY really loved her then and even tried many times to win her back but she jus will not answer his calls or meet him..was she being logical and rational when she decided to go wif tis PE teacher? she knew him barely for 1 mth when 4 yrs have proven how much QY loved her..
mayb i am not in the position to comment abt the relationships of others cos there could be other inherent problems.. but wat i am sayin is if u logically and rationally think abt it.. have u thught abt the good times u had? won;t u give it another chance to work things out rather than findin somethin or someone to fill the void or tryin to escape altogether? nobody is perfect.. no relationship is perfect but like i say b4 its commitment that see things thru..
hmm.. if the shoe fits... just wear it..i apologise if i seem like being KPO or anythin ah.. but a real fren will not stand by and do nothin..if u do read my blog.. i hope u give both of u another chance..
When everythin goes wrong.. its time to stay steady and ai zai..
today back to work.. everythin goes wrong 1) lift broke down, gotta climb steps.. 2) aircon broke down.. place like furnace.. thank God i got a small electric fan..=) 3) password wrong 3 times.. gotta go reset password 4) Laptop hanged 6 times 5) finally when alright, cannot connect internet.. cannot access my email.. tried to change the settings etc but in the end i called for IT for help and realise its some netscreen remote thing which i couldn;t have figured out on my own.. all these in one morning.. finally 6) realise that i din charge my hp batt yest nite and its dyin..
in the middle of it i was gettin abit pek chek but then i felt God remindin me to be ai zai.. relac.. pek chek also no use.. i started to clear my desk, talk to colleagues while each time waitin for my laptop to restart.. then slowly everythin became alright..
think over the years i have become less short fused.. last time i will jus label it an "unlucky" day for me and then be sulky the rest of the day..but tat day i was jus tellin SY 要做大事要有大量.. if things or ppl get u down easily.. God can;t use u in a great way..
anw my exams are over! 1 more term down.. no holidays for us.. tmr another round of madness starts again..at least i got 2 days of enjoyment..ha
Studyin in the cold room at S4 NTU during the nights..
After exams..before Pst Phil svc.. MKC wanted to jus take fotos..
after sat paper.. rushed down to east coast to join the combined cg cycling event.. "Tour De East Coast".. when i reached there.. it almost end aldy but managed to talk to WW's tuition kid JY and MK's fren R.. think they enjoyed themselves.. MKC and KL really spent alot of effort to organize while my N280 just reaped the efforts.. haiz.. paisay..
then went for svc.. Pst Phil is really a master story teller.. then there was somethin i was unhappy abt which spanned from sat to sun.. but again i wun blog abt it..cos dunno who is readin.. all i wanna say is wat i say before.. 说是天下无敌，做就无能为力.. sometimes some ppl can say alot but yet in the end never practise wat they preach..yur actions speak louder than yur words..
yest for once i was so free cos all my ppl involved in either choir prac for Benny Hinn or Emerge.. then JA left without telling me .. so i no bs to give.. saw WH.. but she like dao me leh.. haiz.. cannot be jus frens meh.. waited for DN for over an hour at vivo loh..piang eh...went to see Pursuit of Happyness wif him.. it is a good show but i felt abit draggy.. the kid which is Will Smith;s real son is cute lah..not really as inspirational as i taut..but the guy really has determination and persistence.. there were some really sad parts like when the wife left and when the kid and him were at their lowest point without any place to stay and gotta stay in the toilet..
after the show, we abit cheapskate lah.. we exited from the top and DN suggested we go to another theater to watch another show.. 1st cinema we go they showin "letters from Iwo Jima".. it was aldy middle of the show so we dunno head or tail so left.. 2nd cinema.. they showin "i'm a cyborg but it seems ok".. abit borin and lame so we left after 5 mins.. we were abt to leave then we tried one last cinema.."hannibal rising".. and just startin..ha..alright!! so we watched 2 shows back to back for price of one..shhh... dun tell anyone...
hannibal rising is a super bloody show ..period.
later gg watch 300 wif E.. forgot to wish him happy bdae on sat.. sorry lah bro..mus enjoy my 2 days of break b4 the next round of mugging madness begins tmr again..
yeah i shld be studyin but jus came across this aricle abt the worryin trend of increasin divorces in Singapore and the world..
come to think of it.. a number of youths in N280 and previouslyW283..had parents who were separated or divorced..
then i saw this msn nick "feelings are volatile" .. and it got me thinkin..
its really true human emotions are fickled.. when a couple "feel" that they no longer have love for each other..they break up or divorce..
then i was thinkin how abt those couples in the past who were match made? jus like my grandfather and grandmother.. they din know each other much b4 marriage.. in fact my mum always say both of them were jus poles apart in character but yet they stayed together.. not out of compulsion or obligation but because leaving each other was never an option..and i seen how their love for each other grew over the years that my grandma died soon after my grandfather died ..
love is not jus a moment of feelin..cos feelings are really fickled and volatile.. but its a commitment..jus like wat Sy Rogers was sayin on sunday.. there are definitely times that we ask God where is He.. why did He let somethin happen.. these were times that we "dislike" God but He still loves us anyway.. He is committed to us bcos we are His children..
i rem pastor say this before.. yur feelings for yur spouse will definitely not always be of same level.. there are highs and lows.. and ppl who dun realise it will think they no longer love each other and take the easy way out..jumpin from 1 relationship/marriage to another.. there will always be someone ard u who mayb prettier, smarter, more charming watever than yur partner.. but there is no cause for comparison here cos the other person is not committed to you and vice versa.. its jus like buying a car or computer.. there will always be newer and better models comin up but does that mean u keep changing jus when yur car/computer hangs .. no right.. unless of cos the car/computer is spoilt totally...anw if u do.. it also shows yur character lah..ha
wif commitment comes security bcos both know the other person is not gg to take the easy way out or run off wif the sweet young secretary at office.. they will make efforts to work things out even if it means swallowing yur pride.. sayin sorry etc.. but its easier if both realise this rather than jus a one way thing..
anw i hope my grandfather and grandmother are happy with each other in heaven now..ha
mayb God will bring someone undergoing marriage problems to this blog.. and my entry will save someone's marriage ..ha..
ok destressed.. back to studyin.. later still got cg to lead.. no time sia..
Yest paper was ok lah.. ai zai.. i think i one of the earliest to leave .. not i haolian or anythin but tmr still got the killer equities paper.. then i met SK outside the classromm.. he also left early.. then i jus told him gotta leave early so tat can study for equities.. cannot win the battle and lose the war...
then i jus kept thinkin abt this.. cannot win the battle and lose the war.. sometimes we get too caught up in our daily activities that we neglect ppl ard us.. such a husband who neglects his wife as he is too busy wif work and their relationship suffer in the process.. tats winning the battle and losing the war..sometimes when u get frustrated and start an argument wif someone.. u may win the argument but yet u lose the friendship.. tats winning the battle and losing the war..u study so hard for yur chemistry but din touch yur physics at all.. in the end yur L1R5 suffer.. tats winning the battle and losing the war..
ok tats all for today .. no time liao.. i got a war to fight.. ha
yest 2 gals wif cool Red Bull Bags came promoting red bull in ntu lib.. gave me a can ..say i looked stressed.. no lah i not stressed..i wanted the free can only..ha.. i asked them if their famous mini cooper ard.. yeah its parked somewhere in ntu..
Powered up for few hrs but felt super tired after tat.. thats red bull for you..the taurine effect..
overheard this guy in lib talkin to his frens.. "how will u like if ppl call u Singkie"..ha.. apparently from wat i deduce.. this guy is HK PR in Singapore so his frens were sayin" so u r hongkie lah?"
yest was super rainy.. if can be at home sleepin.. shuang sia.. but..
thinkin where i wanna go after this sem is over in May/June.. hmm... DN got jio me go thailand but think he'll be impatient and go 1st wif his other frens b4 my sem ends..
yest accounting paper was alright.. actually honestly it was very tough.. as usual everyone had the slaughtered look on their face.. halfway thru the paper.. we were makin faces wif each other abt how bad it is.. but like wat i always say.. masters no 2nd upper or 1st class.. pass can aldy.. so relac lah my dear bros and sis.. but of cos must at least pass lah...
yest before exams went suntec church office to help CL return the projector from last sat ..i think i was super unkempt.. din shave.. hair abit messy.. eyes tired.. EV was the receptionist.. think she couldn't recognize me.. ha..then din talk much also.. drop off then went off liao .. abit dao lah.. but no choice leh .. i still had a chapter on pensions to cover and left only 1 hr plus to exams...
after exams gave YY lift home cos she stay near me.. her dad is 公安 superintendent back near beijing..i was tellin her abt this billionaire guy call huang sheng jian who used to be a bottle cap factory worker back in china but became a billionaire after he somehow manage to buy land before china opened up and made a fortune from it.. later he migrated to singapore to become singapore 4th and youngest billionaire.. not very young actually.. think close to 60 but younger than ng teng fong, kwek leng beng etc..
seems random lah..i was just thinkin that his destiny changed becos of the risk he took to invest in some land.. it could have turned the other way and he could be someone struggling to pay his loans back in china.. but for 1 success story, there are dozens of others unsuccesssful.. for every Bill Gates and Warren Buffett, there are many other unknown startups and investors who have got their fingers burned.. but in the end wat prevails is an attitude to get up again..
tat day i was jus talkin to WZ now in RJC, used to be from RI.. he jus failed his physics and was feelin very discouraged.. all these while he was in GEP and i think failure was never in his dictionary but if u dun fail.. how will u ever know the sweetness of success?.. if u dun fail , u will never know the "Rocky" feelin of getting up to fight again?
i'm glad to say that God had allowed trials and failures in my life before.. not that He brought them..but He allowed them just like how He allowed Job to go thru the testings..bcos He loved Job..
wah again philosphical sia..i think these few days study too much liao..ha
anw in the end her blog was alright.. no hacking or anythin..jus change address.. the name also quite interesting..
later exam n i still wastin time online..very good.. well done..ha..ai zai lah..
actually jus now i jus suddenly rem somethin tat CL say durin zone meetin.. she was sayin Would you forget to take your flight to a holiday say in United States? basically the context of the message was loving God.. but would you forget to do somethin if that someone or something is important to you?..
its somethin tat i always tell my N280.. bo sim jiu si bo sim.. ppl can come up wif thousand of reasons and excuses.. sometimes mayb we also mentally help them to come up wif reasons.. reasons why the person din come or call.. reasons why the person forgot to do somethin.. reasons why the person forgot an important date.. but if it really matters to you.. you will rem.. you will set time for it no matter how busy or tired you are.. but if it doesn't really matter to you.. even the silliest of reasons can seem valid.. sorry i killed a mosquito just now.. i gotta go and bury it..
there were many times tat i try to reason why certain ppl behave in certain manner.. and i basically feel that my "bo sim jiu si bo sim" theory stands.. and the more we try to "help" them find excuses for their behaviour.. the more disappointed we become of them the next time it happens again.. hmm.. i not being bitter ah..the "bo sim" ppl are still my friends. jus that it is a way of being wise to protect yurself from being disappointed by ppl..
another thing that spoke to me was wat i have always known from the bible but today it jus suddenly came to me again.. you cannot store new wine in old wineskin.. this applies to every area of our lives.. in yur studies, in yur career, in yur relationships..if u always hold on to old ways of doing things, u will never be willing to learn and pick up new things..u will become obsolete and there will be no promotion or mayb u will even face retrenchment..if u hold onto old relationships and hurts, u will never move on in life jus like how my "biaomei" AB is wif JT, how MK is wif his crush, how JC is wif WC.. all these years things have not changed a single bit for them no matter how much they hope and pray.. mayb God is askin them to move on.. by time after time showin how "bo sim" the other person is and how this is going nowhere but it is themselves who dun wanna believe and come up wif all sorts of justification.. i always believe God works thru natural circumstances around us to show us things..i myself used to be like this.. but i have realised that some memories are best left kept in the corner or better still to be erased for better future memories to come and replace them...
wah... how come i so philosophical today?
another half hour gone..
yest YY came to join me half way to study cos she works in ntu... then later she went back lab cos her prof lookin for her.. when the lib close.. i went to her lab.. far sia.. but it is a good place to study cos everyone is really quiet doing their research..and it was already 10.. nobody was gg home.. really dedicated researchers sia..
alot to study and so little time.. gotta destress abit..
even M online says she is stressed.. ok .. i am slightly relieved.. better not talk to CH.. he sure ai zai one..
weekend as usual busy.. din study much..
sat zone meetin at riverwalk.. picked up AB at her block.. must admit she looked pretty that day cos after zone meetin she needed to attend company function as "vase" to accompany VIP and give out prizes.. then CL n the other ldrs went to Clarke Quay TCC to discuss 4C and also celebrate SL's bdae.. din join them dinner cos really gotta study.. went back to get my car at riverwalk.. parkin fee is whooping $16!!! din know they charge by hour.. think its my most ex so far.. beat the $13 previously when i parked at orchard ..
wanted to go home but promised AB liao i will fetch her after the function..gotta honour my words.. somemore she finishin so late n wear so pretty .. not safe to go home so late..so went smu to study 3 hrs before fetchin her n model fren at marina mandarin close to 12am..super hungry by then.. haven't ate since breakfast..used to it anw..
sunday for once.. i chop chop finish givin my bs to MK then went home study.. can't really concentrate..went ntu to run 179 route.. 爽！then went home watch 无间道2.. felt guilty n wanted to pia the rest of the night but still was not very efficient..
yeah and i got a new couch at home.. delivered on sat.. it looks good and comfy too..fri night had to help my parents shift stuff ard to make way for the couch..
haiz.. jus wasted another half hr online.. told CH that we need to bring more post it notes tmr.. ha..
hmm..anw dun understand why the blog was removed.. hope it was not hacked again or somethin serious.. cannot be bcos of wat i say previously in my last entry abt always readin that blog right? mayb the blog became too high profile for its own good like wat happened to mine.. that really warranted a change of address..haiz.. watever it is.. hope everythin's alright for her..
using someone's unsecured network now... paikia at it again..ha..shld be alright lah..
Jus now decided to take foto of my "wife".. recently she always sick.. sometimes buay start.. must sayang then can.. ppl ask me change.. say COE cheap.. say my car old..i say cannot.. she been wif me thru thick n thin..those ppl never got ride from me again.. ha..how dare they say my "wife".. when my "wife" runs.. their nissans, toyotas and hyundais can eat dust loh..
gg crazy..think i study too much liao lah..
taken yest at office cubicle.. think i look really tired..got eye bag liao leh..not that i hiao lah.. but it starts to dawn on u when ppl keep askin u why u look tired.. haiz..
recently i got this habit of checkin someone's blog.. also dunno why..then i will leave comments..but if everytime i leave comments.. later she think i abit weirdo leh.. anw if u happen to read this.. i dun think u look like ur sister leh.. mayb cos i din see u wif ur rebonded hair..=)
on leave today.. all the way until next next monday to study for exams.. ha.. so its sch holidays for me too.. except its not really holiday cos gotta study..
i realise my study attention span is limited to half hour.. at most give it 45 mins b4 i start lookin at ppl carryin packs of rice below the library or ppl tryin to use the machine to borrow books but dunno how to.. or i jus subconsciously find myself suddenly at a computer terminal using SEL's ntu acct to surf net and blog.. oops..
still got another 200 pages to go before i finish readin up on cash flows..pengz.. from my readin.. realised JP Morgan and Citigroup were implicated in Enron's financial scandal by coverin up their financial cash flows to the Special Purpose Entities(SPE) as operating cash flows ..then that day the VP was sayin they need ppl wif integrity leh..hmm..
actuali now i realise how those money laundering and left pocket-to-right pocket artificial cash flow creaton takes place thru "shells" or SPE that companies create.. its really ingenious..last time i see those HK dramas or movies but dun really understand how they did it.. ha.. now i am smarter...
mayb next time if i happen to work for some secret society dua paikia.. i can practise what i learn in the books! ha..
Liverpool lost but still thru .. cos poor barca jus cannot find the second goal..
indonesia another air crash.. its one disaster after another.. both natural and human disasters.. its really quite sad..
its really quite difficult to study on my bed... not that i want to but i got no choice cos my desk is too full..n my bed is too big.. somethin i realised 17 years ago when we move in but too lazy to knock it down and change.. really gotta go to school to study where at least i have a proper desk..ever since JC..A level,Uni and now .. i hardly study at home cos i will jus easily be distracted to watch tv, surf net, sleep..too relac liao.. i must see ppl ard me studyin then i will pressure myself to study.. some weird mentality
Wanted to go with E to watch movie after bs just now cos no meetin today cos CL met the rest yest aldy after PM which i din go cos studyin.. but decided to discipline my flesh to come home study..after exams lah bro..da sao aldy commented in one of my entries tat she dun control u leh..ha..she only remote control u lah.. oops .. kiddin lah da sao..
jus now saw the news on earthquake tremors in singapore.. showed ppl in SAJC and concourse evacuating..one old lady being interviewed very funny leh.. she said she thought someone was shakin the table..ha..some students in SA were waving and posing for camera leh..heard that some offices declare half day.. why din happen to my office? ha..
abit bored studyin my accounting module..mergers& acquisition...pooling and purchase method.. jiu ming ah..
later liverpool - barcelona.. now 1 plus.. if i lun4 n study until 3am .. possible? possible lah.. but i will be 3/4 zombified later la.. esp after work still got bs and zone ldrs meeting all the way until 11 plus..
hmm.. think i wake up 2nd half to watch lah..
2-0..i hope..bellamy and risse again lah then its cfm drama..
for my faithful readers out there.. i am sorry if u were upset to discover yur bedtime paikia entertainment had disappeared.. no fanatical stalker had hacked my blog.. neither did the earthquake tremors today destroyed it..
under the advice of E, and after much consideration, i have decided to change my blog address cos too many ppl know abt it aldy .. and i am a low profile person..hope it doesn't get discovered by those i dun want to know this time
so decided to add a kua in front .. so its kua xi mi? and xi mi dai ji!
like wat my entry said on sunday.. if u blog the politically right stuff for others to see then u r a real hypocrite.. on sunday i was confronted on wat i had said in some previous entries.. i had not backstab anyone but wat i had described was the real incident and i was questioning in these entries why they behaved in such a manner..i could have sugar coat the whole matter n written things like "its ok..i still love them" etc but thats being a hypocrite..in fact after the incident i din hold anythin against them.. i forgot abt the whole matter and still gave the 2 guys frequent trips and rides home.. where got such a nice guy like me? now someone gotta bring the whole matter up again by reporting on my blog.. why?
today i tried to talk to one of the guys on msn abt something else but he gave me those kind of obviously bo chup one sentence reply.. i am not sure if he knew abt wat i wrote in the blog..i feel that he know abt it lah.. watever..
still wondering how my blog was discovered by those i din want to read.. why did she have to tell? haiz..
Went for interview jus now at JP Morgan..The Capital Tower building looked impressive..din know such a buildin existed..only the VP interviewed me.. he looked quite young.. think at most give him 36 bah.. i guessed i did alright .. have been tryin to speak Ploper Engrish over the weekend .. in the end the VP also not the ang moh pai one.. chey.. He keep tellin me the job very xiong but i hear already i dun think very xiong leh.. if i fail this interview then it must be bcos the "swap" question he asked me.. asked me what is a swap and vanilla swap.. piangz .. last sem learn one but forgot liao leh.. haiz. i jus honestly told him i cannot rem..
yest nite finally rushed finish my portion for the equity project and emailed to "boss" AY.. 4 pages.. tried to smoke it to 5 pages but unsuccessful.. poor AY.. jus now sms us say she sick.. can't compile today.. really wanna help her.. sms her that i can help but she din reply cos i guess the bulk of the valuation portion is being done by CT and her.. so i can;t help much there either..
super tired at work today cos of rushing the equity project last night.. told myself i will sleep earlier tonight but somehow it never materialise and here i am still blogging..
still can;t get over liverpool 1-0 loss... if its any other team i will soon forget.. yes even chelsea.. somehow i got somethin against Man U lah.. ha..ZF.. u reading this? prob also the goal was so last min.. and Scholes got sent off.. tat night right after i say Scholes gg to do somethin spectacular.. he got himself sent off.. right after i say sekali Man U fight back .. they really did.. talk abt "prophetic" sia...
jus now went Jurong Point to buy Nelly Furtado's loose album..wanted to buy it long time back..radio always can hear songs like "promiscuous". :say it right", "all good things come to an end".. i like the last one especially but lyrics abit sad:" flames to dust..lovers to friends..why do all good things come to an end?" the album is good lah.. alot of fast tracks.. the kind i like to blast as i speed down AYE to go home after lesson..ha.. made me feel like Beng on the Road
din know Sembawang Music there shut down aldy.. went MJ instead.. got Singapore version of the album only $11.90.. cheap sia
tried to keep this blog low profile so I can pen some frustrationI face but seems nothin is personal nowadays..
U really dunno who is reading..
To anyone who may have been offended.. I just wanna apologise for blogging some of the things I felt at the moment.. I have saved them into drafts.. not to be published
But i also wanna say that i am not someone who remembers and holds a grudge.. once its over.. i will just forget it even though at that moment i may have been angry.. I prefer to rem happy times.. its selective amnesia..so i really have nothin against anyone
i wanted to be real and transparent but guess with online social responsibility this is just not possible.. mayb many ppl are jus conforming to the ways that they are expected to behave rather than voicing out what they really feel..
God.. I know I need to change.. help me.. but I also want to be someone real, not putting on masks..
In ntu.. Readin thru reports n reports of Singtel, Cosco, China Aviation Oil, Genting Intl, CDL...Piang eh.. Pia so much now still first page of project.. mayb i should increase font size..ha
2 hrs left before ntu lib close.. gotta pia more.. as usual down here like Abattoir loh.. super cold.. we not frozen meat leh..ha
yest think i talked too fast again durin preachin.. din feel it was very smooth..
recently i keep lookin at frenster n blog of this person.. seems an interestin person
Jus received call abt interview at JP Morgan next monday.. actually i abit bo chup cos the business analyst post not really wat i want but i jus go.. the headhunter JL gotta remind me to talk properly cos i guess within the short time that she interviewed me, she realised about my lah, loh etc..even SL commented 2 weeks ago that i say alot of "hor" when i give cg msg.. ok i will speak ploper engrish can anot? but paikia cannot speak angmoh ploperly one leh..ha..JL say will pray for me.. she always email me alot of christian articles..no wonder that day she asked me which church i attend..she somemore got invite me to her church .. macham want me to 跳槽..
yest my department got lunch at this Japanese restaurant call Kushin- bo at suntec..of cos it was all paid for.. to welcome the 3 new ppl joining the department..the buffet was good..
2 things u will notice.. 1)my dept all guys.. 2) everyone dun look so happy..piang eh.. even "Leaving Star" like me who director and manager put into 冷宫 also can smile..
Yest during lesson was quite zonked out.. wanted to jus go home straight to rest after lesson ended at 1030pm.. but... M as usual asked me to give her lift home after lesson.. sometimes i really wanna ask her to take mrt herself since its really not exactly on the way.. i dun like it when ppl dun reply yur sms, ignore yur msn and then when need help from u .. suddenly become all smiley and nice.. AB is like that.. M is also like that.. and both are my so called "biaomei" and "sister".. haiz.. sometimes familarity really breeds contempt..mayb i am jus too nice lah.
Wah Piangz.. tio pian... went all the way to HDB hub to try to pay my fine but the lady said tempered coupons offence cannot be compunded fine there.. the guys at Police HQ dunno their job leh.. made me waste petrol and time..
heard that SG gg JP Morgan to be trader.. went thru 10 rounds of interview.. i am provoked in a good sense.. i really gotta be more active liao lah.. i dun see why if SG can do it.. i cannot.. sometimes the sleepin giant need something to prick him to wake him up..
abit cheered up today when i opened the attachement from charmaine.. my name is there at the top of our zone.!!. ha..Priase God!! beat SL, AM, ML and all the rest for both svc and cg.. quite unexpected cos i taut my N280 did quite badly but really gotta maintain.. i know SL mayb dismiss it as one off cos i supposedly got the better ppl after multiplication.. watever lah.. i know i worked hard and deserve it can aldy..
for too long i really have been passive especially in my career, gotta fight back now..i am Rocky!
wanna watch pursuit of happyness and rocky.. also letters from iwo jima which i suppose to watch wif E on monday that just passed but too busy liao lah.. sorry lah bro.. after exams in march.. i go wif u lah if da sao give u day off..ha.. watch rocky instead can?
Fri went Orchard Swensen wif S.. din know that day havin Chingay.. super crowded.. alot of roads blocked.. gotta park at Taka and walk long way.. She gave me somethin wif "Ivan" on ot.. paisay lah.. wanted to treat her lah but she dun eat dinner.. piangz..wat gals do to stay slim.. Drove to East Coast .. went wrong and long way.. long time haven't so relac liao.. on the way home SL called me and FJ to conf call to get some things tied up for next day zone 食字路口.. i no earpiece so one hand hold phone other hand steering wheel all the way from east coast to bukit timah..S was so scared.. jus like AB tat time.. ai zai.. i used to doin this liao..ha...
Sat 食字路口 went alright..except alot of ppl put aeroplane last min..haiz.. waste of our efforts.. my N280 got second after they 反败为胜 in the grand finale! they really can eat fast.. ha.. at least they get the $20 swensen voucher i went to get earlier in the morning.. so happy for them..many had to leave after the game so jus took foto wif the remaining after we lau yu sheng..
after tat went clementi bookstore to buy "investment valuation" by damodaran.. i seldom buy recommended text.. but this time really bo bian cos our current lecturer is quite bad and i need to read up to do the project.. stressed lah.. though it cos $60 but i din regret lah cos the book is really good.. guess its useful too if i become equity analyst in future..after that went to fetch my parents and 二伯 and wife to my oldest cousin's wife's mother's wake in bukit timah..then went home to STUDY.. along the way watch abit soccer.. Liverpool 4-0 sheffield.. oh yah forgot to mention their 2-1 Barca on last wed.. solid lah.. they on a roll liao!
sun..as usual super busy.. immediately after service.. gave 2 rounds of bible studies.. 1 lesson to FJ's ppl cos FJ had to take makeup cg.. then other lesson to MK.. then after bs.. charmaine wanted to meet up the leaders..
on sun.. on the way drivin home.. i felt upset and angry over some things ..haiz.. i dun understand why.. many thoughts ran thru my mind.. but i jus have to contend that mayb this is not for me lah.. its been a long while liao..God.. when i went home and jus slept to forget the matter.. woke up feeling still upset but better lah.. sometimes when u dun understand.. u jus live wif it n pray things turn out well..
mon.. still feelin upset but jus tried to forget it.. met up wif YL for lunch as she also not feeling good.. i feel better when i can cheer others up and forget abt my own problems.. I always believe that we are blessed to be a blessing..
we went West coast macs .. first time i went there though i passed by a few times.. next time can't see her on news liao lah..it always feels good to meet up wif old frens..both of us agreed that the happiest times we had was during jc when everything seems so carefree .. other than A levels lah.. those council days.. ha.. unforgettably fun lah..
went for interview at JL at international plaza at 6 .. i was cheered up for one very silly reason.. hence the title of this blog entry..i effortlessly drove my way to international plaza and reached on time without planning my route or checking street directory.. i wasn't even thinking.. i jus turn and turn then bingo!.. but the reaon i felt cheered up bcos it reminded me that my life is in God's hands and somehow he will bring me to my destination even when along the way there are things i dun understand or dun like...
anw for Miss LQ who may be reading this.. yes.. JL is the person u mention..ha.. she recommended this business analyst job at JP Morgan.sounds good lah but need programming leh.. i haven't done programming since my powerful final year project on stock analysis based on elliott wave theory..chim eh? she was tryin to convince me to take it.. say only 20% programming.. haiz.. i will just try lah.. i cannot 忍 when ppl like SG and FJC all breakin bond and leavin and i am still here..
anw hope the A level students in N280 like CC and HN get good results this fri.. told the whole cg to pray for them..
this morning went wif my mum to Police HQ at Cantonment road to settle my HDB parking coupon warrant case... along the way Mum was sayin she have lived more than half a century and never stepped into a police station.. told her we got only one life.. must try everything mah.. ha.. my mum was rolling her eyes loh..
my mum over paranoid abt parkin now..said she will get one big stack of coupons for me so i will never have to do this again..the whole warrant process chop chop leh cos nobody.. it was not as serious as i thought it was.. Praise God! they gave me a new court date and told me to go HDB Hub at Toa Payoh to settle my fine first before court date.. tmr i will go..my mum also said wanna go..thnk she catchin on wif this exciting life her son is living..ha.. hope the fine is not so ex..
i think sometimes i really too paikia aldy.. 2004 argument with the old paikia over the accident case..2005 shares contra losses.. debtors chasing me.. 2006 warrant and court over HDB parking coupon offence.. 2007 DSTA security breach for climbing over locked gate.. haiz.. i must be more 乖 lah..
Recently learned tat SG also gg break bond.. everybody my batch is leaving.. think only FJC is the most open.. the rest so far all so secretive.. BL must take the cake for his ultra secretive last day "good bye" to his colleagues loh.. wonder one day if i will like that also..
AL yest gave me good lobang to this headhunter call JL who intro her to her current job in statestreet bank.. after sendin resume to JL.. she called me within half an hr.. first thing she said " another scholar wanna break bond ah?".. funny sia.. she seem friendly person.. AL say JL profited ard a cool 2000 as referral fee for AL's entry into statestreet..Monday need to bring my CV, transcript and certs down to their office..AL said must give her treat if i get any job from this.. of cos give treat lah.. grass can anot? ha.. kiddin lah..
C got an interview at Morgan Stanley.. jus now online asked her how was it.. she no reply.. mayb not so good lah..
yest equity valuation lesson as usual lost half way..this lecturer not good lah.. think the "PonTeng" rate increasing wif every lesson.. think i really need to follow CH and get the textbook from clementi bookstore and force myself to read..somemore another project due.. then exams.. the never ending recurring cycle..
finally admitted to my mum abt my police summon traffic case that require a gurantor to accompany.. somehow my mum got some telepathy that will tell her when her son is troubled and hiding somethin from her.. tat day she cold war me to force me to tell her loh even though i keep denyin anythin was wrong.. haiz.. still can't believe one HDB parkin coupon can get me into so much trouble.. hope this thing blows over quickly..
finally sold my beauty china shares yest.. make only $70 but bo bian lah.. gotta prepare for the big fine comin wif this court summon.. next up is my SPC shares.. today rose $0.12.. jus $0.02 more and its my buy price.. hope can sell it soon then my summon case is settled liao..
later meetin S for dinner at Orchard.. she comin from M'sia to visit relatives here.. sure gg to complain to me abt that designer guy again lah.. ha
tmr gg to be busy wif combined cg 食字路口.. basically so far SL had done anythin.. all is me and FJ doin loh.. haiz.. then yest got it from SL over the phone some more.. suan le.. turnout so far not good.. hope the frens will come..
Can't believe its wed today aldy.. time really flies when its holidays..
On Fri, after company CNY lunch at Tung Lok East Coast.. btw the food there is good but the service could be improved lah.. and my table won some first prize in the 新年成语 game..first prize is cheapskate Kappa water bottle leh..haiz..walk aimlessly ard east coast for a while.. quite empty on weekday.. sat by the sea.. feeling a little lonely..then decided to snap outta of it.. drove down to Orchard..shop ard..went Tangs to buy a pair of jeans.. then met DN to lim kopi at Coffee Bean at Wheelock.. DN like E is one of my better frens whom i can talk nonsense and jio out anytime.. he had to go for a ministry dinner so i was left myself to walk ard again..
Sat morning.. went to NTU gym.. felt unfit for quite some time liao..After some workout.. took a break..
Then did last min spring cleaning as well as clean up the inside of my "wife" tog wif my mum.. xiong ah..its been ages since i cleaned the inside of my car.. its really dirty loh.. Thank God my mum helped me..After that its our annual reunion dinner.. really nan de that 4 of us can eat tog.. think it was a great time..
My mum helped me highlight my hair cos she wanted to experiment wif some Garnier hair dye..after the experiment.. i drove down to Tiong Bahru.. parked there and took MRT down to Chinatown to meet AB and gang since the roads were closed there..
For the 1st time i walked along Eu tong sen road, since it was closed, .. and not driving like i usually do every tues, thu and sat on the way to lesson..after all the terrible squeezing.. i finally made my way to Lucky Chinatown Macs where the rest were..then we went for the countdown.. the crowd was crazy lah.. super crowded loh.. i managed to catch a glimpse of the firecrackers and fireworks.. then the gang went ard to shop.. some more squeezing..by 1 plus.. i was super zoned out after all the squeezing.. needed to catch the last ttrain to Tiong Bahru to drive home.. AB and JS wanted to stay on.. so i jus went off first.. sms exchange wif WH until ard 3 plus 4.. she helping her mum 守岁.. wah fillial sia..
first day of CNY is usually my family visiting day and as usual the Ahmad Me gotta work.. actually i really like to drive rather than be driven.. so first to 大伯 in old Jurong West, then to my Aunt's place in Toa Payoh.. saw accidents along the way.. standard like CNY always got accident along PIE..then to my uncle's place also Toa Payoh.. then to my 姑妈's place in Teban Gardens then fly home cos my aunt and uncle were waitin at our doorstep..then stayed home to watch TV movies.. 花好月圆 and 千机变2 both quite nice leh..
second day 大伯 and his entourage of my cousin brothers and family came invading at 10 plus in morning.. then i decided that i need to study else i gg to feel guilty so took up my equity evaluation notes and bia... then did wat was by now an annual ritual of gg to my jc classmate PSL's house in jurong east to meet up wif my JC good frens like PSL, DC, jie HY, YN, LQ, AA.. played mahjong there but of cos being the principled guy.. cannot play money for me else i wun play..ha i won quite a number of rounds.. think in fact the most.. think i am still very good even though i played once a year..the gals wanted to hear AA's valentine date .. but AA too engrossed playin mahjong wif the professional uncles and aunties at PSL's house so they turned their attention to me.. haiz.. after some pressuring.. i jus tell them some stuff loh..left after dinner to meet up CL zone ldrs to watch"Just Follow Law".. it was funny lah.. usual Jack Neo stuff.. but abit plotless lah.. but 2 hrs flew by quite fast wif all the jokes.. give it 3 stars lah
third day 姑妈 visited early morning,then fetch my parents and 姑妈's family to 二伯's house.. i din go cos gotta rush to N280's 初三大三元.. our steamboat lunch plus celebrate michelle's bdae.. alot of food and guess michelle had a good time trying to find the presents we hid.. alot of ppl came and think at one moment there were 10 plus ppl squeezed into michelle's room loh..we played this very fun game call "Ugly" game where everyone had to snatch the cards whenever it appeared the third time.. fun game lah.. then the usual dai dee and vcd watching.. i left at 6 to fetch DN at bishan mrt to go down marina to watch 门徒.. the show is good lah but i dun think worth 4 stars like the papers say leh.. i give it 3 stars ba..not enff action leh i think.. think 张静初's acting was superb..actuali she and Daniel Wu are the main cast..古天乐 and anita yuen abit cala faire leh..wanted to go the river hongbao to walk but we too lazy so in the end din go..
think overall my CNY quite well spent lah.. abit worried abt my police warrant summon for the HDB parking coupon summon that i thought they forgot abt.. received the letter on new year eve....haiz.. think better settle soon..hope i dun need to pay alot..
It was V'day yest.. din go anywhere.. H sms me a courteous msg, WH msn me and MC sms me to suan me , DB wanted dinner but i jus din feel like gg anywhere or havin any program.. i was msning AB abt somethin i felt angry abt.. really want to walk away from it .. sometimes i think i have become indifferent.. Went to queensway shoppin centre and bought a pair of jeans.. which even my mum taut was nice.. and $20 only.. really a good deal.. i suspect they priced it wrongly cos all the other pairs ard were at least $35..
Jus had lunch wif CL at IKEA Alexandra..she was super apologetic for being so late.. she asked me abt that time my dinner wif WH.. ha.. so long ago.. i jus told her that i felt WH's personality too strong for me.. asked me abt ML.. i say i too familiar wif her liao ah.. asked abt my incident wif AM.. told her we're really alright aldy.. shared wif me stuff abt the cg and zone.. good bonding time wif my boss..
Bought flowers from Xpressflowers at Ikea.. later will give to the cg sisters after svc..
Wah.. buay tahan ah.. i am sick.. yet cannot go home leh.. later got lesson..then today is 1st lesson for equity.. no choice gotta lun.. used up a whole box of tissue liao loh..my eyes keep watering.. my nose keep running.. started wif sorethroat on sunday and now flu.. think i am spreadin germs ard my office...
quite long since i this sick..mus be my punishing schedule of work,study, ministry.. think over the weekend of fri , sat and sun i slept a total of less than 16hrs.. cos gotta discuss and do my FSA project too.. glad i finally finish my part.. guess CNY is a good time to catch up on resting..
yest went for interview at PrimePartners at OUB towers..the chairman was quite friendly and knowledgeable.. 1/2 of the interview was spent on talking my FSA project in informatics.. ha.. glad i did the project.. i felt the interview went well.. really hope that they will not only buy out the bond but also offer me the job with a great salary.. All things are possible!
Supposed to meet AY for project but she said no need meet cos th epart i emailed her is quite alright aldy.. so spent my evening at bugis suntec and marina tryin to shop fo rCNY clothes else my mum gg to nag me again.. last nite told her i dun wanna cut my hair cos i am not gg to pay an extra $5 to get my hair cut during this period..and she nag me quite alot leh.. anw finally bought a cheap but good long sleeved polo top at marina.. by then i was half dead aldy loh.. shopping is one of the most xiong things guys can do.. chiong sua also not so xiong leh i think..
tmr is Valentine's Day.. CL shiftin ldrs meeting today so that SL and FJ can go out wif their other halves tmr.. i guess if i had asked WH or H out.. they won;t mind but dun wanna get into anythin now esp when i am jus so busy.. or is busy an excuse? Maybe sometimes i abit deceiving myself..
Today some of my youths receive their results.. haiz.. as usual there will be those that did better than expected and those that din perform up to expectations.. heard from ML that XL quite upset.. she had wanted to go SAJC but i dun think its possible now.. later b4 cg i will have to counsel her.. but i think she is stronger than this lah..
It seem so long ago that i received my O level results.. still can;t believe my results until today.. its really God's wisdom that guided me.. All my life i know i am not very smart or talented but one thing I have is God and I have proven time and again that God is with me all this while..
Later is the 1st cg for the new N280.. Ai Zai.. actually watever i do i will tell myself i must enjoy the process.. otherwise i won;t do well.. same thing as leading cg or making a presentation...some ppl becomes so caught up wif presenting themselves well that they forgot the true meaning of enjoying the process..
Gg to be another super busy weekend for me.. later gg movie marathon wif the cg brothers then tmr whole day gotta discuss project with AY in school.. then sunday its another whole day thing.. Life is busy but meaningful! ha..
Stressed over my accounting project lah.. but guess i am not the only.. everyone in class like similar predicament.. tryin to squeeze watever time i ave to read up on cash flow and analyse the infomatics financial statements but abit no avail..gotta make myself useful to my group leh...
Last night attended this talk by Morgan Stanley.. however dun seem really keen after hearing their nightmare schedule and looking how tired they look.. prob the pay is alot but like wat LYY say when i fetched her back after the talk, the money is not worth it in the end.. Today PrimePartners call me for interview next monday.. though its a small asset management firm but i feel if I want to cross over, i have to start from the small firms and its prob these small firms that may buy you out..So hope for the best..
On monday.. somethin bad happened.. i was called up by internal security for a foolish action that i did on 29 jan.. i was caught on camera doing a Jackie Chan.. ..i jumped over one of the locked gates at 9 plus after our main side gate had been locked.. i din wanna walk the long way and had actually done this before.. but the siao on security guard that day saw me and after checkin the card reader.. they knew it was me.. haiz..
i was made to write a statement.. think this will reflect badly on my record.. i sent an email to my manager KSY and director LJW.. both up to today din reply or say anythin.. its not like i leaked state secrets or anythin.. haiz..i am aldy feeling bad enuff.. yet they refused to show support for me.. with bosses like this wif zero EQ.. no wonder this organization is gg downhill and they can question why none of the scholars are stayin?!..
forget it lah.. like wat KWH say.. its another push factor for me to go.. i have decided to stop complaining and start doing.. do wat.. send more resumes lah..ha
AB asked me to fetch her go JT's house on Valentine's Day to give him cake.. wah piangz.. i told her later JT jealous leh.. haiz.. suggested another plan to her that few of us pretend to go out wif JT then disappear at convenient time..macham taiwan idol love drama.. she dun want leh..
Recently WH started to sms me alot agian .. hiaz.. sometimes i jus ignore.. dunno if i doing the right thing but i think i am really too busy now to chup anw lah.. but like wat i say.. bo sim jiu si bo sim.. if wu sim.. no matter how busy u r .. u will still try to reply.. its jus a matter of how much importance u place on someone or something..
Yest nite din get to watch the Asean Cup finals on TV as i had to attend this family dinner hosted by my cousin at Spring Court restaurant at Upper Cross..On the way home. my bro and i were heard over Power 98 that both teams drew 1-1 so Singapore wins overrall..Solid lah!
Before the dinner yest.. after bs,ldrs' meetin and givin CL and AM lift , had 2 hrs to spare so i parked my car at Hong Lim Complex near where my dinner was.. and like those taxi uncles, took a short nap and study! Halftime break..
think i am now bettin busier and busier wif all the cg stuff, project submission, work deadlines.. hardly got time to blog everythin..
yest during dinner my bro showed me the handphone foto of him and his gf! wah for so long.. i and mum speculated but he always secretive.. She looks pretty enuff to be my 大嫂..ha..somemore cgl.. bro say she abit stressed cos my bro is like a ZS in his church so their relationship is like quite high profile lo..i was sharin wif my bro abt JC and WH.. my bro is really good at counselling and he really can diagnose the problems.. his ZS or in their terms is sub district leader position not anyhow get one loh..told him when he gets married, i will be his Ahmad in my new BMW 3 series by then..ha.. i proclaim it first in Jesus' name!..
On sat fetched AB, WY, WY's bro and fren home after svc.. WY as usual was very chirpy and talked to AB..AB passed some money to JC and ask her pass to TF.. we din even say hello.. on the way to my car, passed by JC car.. and started "kicking" it.. all these while AB never really helped me with JC issue.. she some "biaomei" la.. when need lift and help in maths then come and find me.. i jus told her i dun want to chase JC or anythin but jus wanna know that she likes someone or is happily attached then it is enuff for me to really move on lah.. actuali i think i dun really have anythin for her aldy .. its jus the feelin that some things u dun understand that holds u back.. i dun want answers lah but i want closure..
Yest when i reach home near to 12.. was surprised to see that the telecast of the Singapore-Thailand match still on.. during lunch time DN proudly showed me his grandstand tix.. could not go anw cos i had bs and ldrs meetin at riverwalk..
anw as half of Singapore prob know by now.. we won 2-1 but after a controversial penalty which saw the thai team walk off..actually shld have jus banned them after that and let singapore win the match walkover mah.. 2nd leg also no need to play liao.. how can set a precedent.. then next time Liverpool losing.. Benitez jus ask Stevie G and the rest to walk off to take a bath first then come back also can lah.. then singapore shld do the same thing when they go bangkok for 2nd leg.. if they 1-0 down..go nearby kopitiam lim tom yam soup 1st then return to the pitch
Yest nite abit unhappy wif my helpers.. WW as usual not faithful in little things.. HN give me a bo chap answer.. only ML is the most responsive and consistent.. i really give it to them in a 7 page sms..on one hand i think i need to give more grace to them but on the other hand as it is the beginning of new N280.. i feel i need to set the tone right.. otherwise.. we can easily fall into the rut and complacency that plagued the old N280..i dun need facilitators who just give me figures, i need ppl who can take initiative and really do the groundwork.. if i can talk and address the problems of ZG, BK and JA in one day despite my work deadlines, lessons,projects, tests, bs, ldrs meeting, they can't be busy as me. told them if they feel its too tough, i can find others or do it myself.. but hope they will stick with me..
Yest also gave it to "biaomei" AB.. told her to wake up her idle lah.. she wait for JT for 6 yrs liao.. told her wat fairy tale endin she hopin to see? How many more 6 yrs does she have? Mayb as she is waitin for this fairy tale, many other fairy tales have passed her by.. She is easily one of the prettier gals ard in the zone and even in church..she dun need to degrade herself like that.. i told her somethings dun need to spell out so clearly.. bo sim jiu si bo sim..its just like JC and me.. why make things so difficult and complicated?
WH msg me online after such a long time since the dinner incident..told me she was gg back ballet school and ask me buy the tix to her future performances.. of cos will support lah.. i taut WH will not talk to me after that incident since i also din msg her or anythin.. but i guess things are cleared up aldy lah.. so i am relegated back to being her "acquaintance".. actuali i will really will have done more if i was cgl aldy then or if she was not cgl.. but mayb somethings not meant to be lah..
Yest nite after ldrs meetin, i really jus wanna go home, eat dinner and watch Singapore match then my cashcard not enuff money.. gotta top up else my car can't exit riverwalk carpark.. went over to central shopping center.. the whole clarke quay mrt and central dun have one lousy POSB/DBS ATM!! then walk over to Funan, Peninsula.. all close.. in the end gotta walk until Raffles City!! its crazy lah.. rem i was feeling super fed up.. then bought a milo ice to cool down then for $1.50.. they give me one super small cup loh with alot of ice and little milo! Wah fed up.. then my car almost couldn;t start again and thru out the whole journey home, one indicator warning light on my dashboard was dangerously on, somethin with the spark plug again..super pek chek..but thank God i made it home without having to call any Tow
When things go wrong, they go wrong altogether..Yur patience is being tested.. gotta keep yur cool
On Monday nite.. on the way home, i was angry with these 2 pedestrians.. it was close to 10pm along dimly lit Depot Road.. my car was speeding home after a long day at work.. then these 2 pedestrians took their time to cross this T junction .. the worst thing was it was a red man and green light for me.. if i din jam brake.. i will have run them over and into big trouble loh.. i had to jam my brake so hard that my laptop in my backseat flew and hit my seat..
after i managed to stop in time, i was really pissed.. i horned at them and stared at them.. they were just bo chap!.. still keep lookin back and continue to cross thee road slowly.. the guy somemore stared back at me like it was my wrong..din even apologise.. the driver of another car that stopped beside me was also staring at that guy.. i seriously suspect that that guy either has some mental problem or he honestly doesn't know that it is wrong and dangerous to cross when it is a red man
doesn't he know that he is endangering himself and others when he does things like that?.. if there was a car behind me then.. it will have cause an accident even if i manage to avoid hittin them..i was just thinkin of the actress Xu Weilun who died in the accident.. her life was cut short unexpectedly by an accident and yet these ppl dun treasure the lives they have now and askin for accident by doing such things!
haiz.. really dunno wat these ppl thinkin lah.. sometimes i feel ppl take for granted their lives.. without realising how precious yet fragile a human life can be...
These few days have been talkin alot wif ppl under me in new cg.. met ML for lunch on monday at harbourfront.. ML is really a good helper.. she initiate lunch wif me rather than i askin.. talkin abt that .. all the ex-w366 ppl also abit attitude.. haiz.. gotta win them over lah.. anw gotta know ML better and ask her abt her bullemic problem which i learned from MKC previously.. tat nite wanted to conf call wif all 3 of them but ML last min cannot due to work so i talked individually wif WW and HN.. think it was a fruitful time.. yest nite had another long talk wif JA..he had not been doing well for quite some time.. i felt it was good he was willing to shared wif me some struggles and problems he gg thru rather than just MIA.. i jus encouraged and prayed for him..wanted to meet up wif CC for lunch yest but his fater's company in tuas.. too far to meet him for lunch lah..
yest went home heard my mum say this actress 许玮伦 died in a car accident.. wat a waste.. she's the same age as me..saw her show b4.. quite pretty..jus heard over radio that her assistant was drivin the car and they were rushin to some place for filming.. i think i really gotta slow down next time when i drive..
Fri cg went well lah though i taut i was talkin too fast as usual.. its not i kam jiong leh.. in fact i think i'm not scared at all.. jus that i think i process things too fast and it jus comes out.. but like wat SL say.. i must let others have the time to let wat i say sink in.. then the impact will be greater..then the ppl were cryin buckets cos its last cg..even guys like WW and KL also..sent XL home after cg.. his place really ulu loh..
Hardly slept 3 hrs..Sat early mornin.. woke up 6 plus.. went to fetch AB, LK and JX to send off ZM at airport..think he will miss us lah.. he really got alot of stuff..dunno when we will see him again but really wish him all the best..then fetch AM, JX, LK, SEL to city hall before gg SMU to study..wasn't very productive that day.. dunno why leh.. mayb cos helpin NK to arrange makeup cg loh.. i think it was the most difficult makeup cg i had to arrange cos of his timing.. after 3pm on sat or sun morning and this week pst ar bernard so many cg change cg to non-service timings..then after so much hassle.. he din go.. waste my time and effort lah..
at ard lunchtime, SM came to student lounge where i was studyin..she had project discussion.. dunno when my "charlie's angels" wanna start discussing leh..anw really had a good time knowin her..told her she looks better on weekend without her specs and office attire than on weekdays..and she know it herself..ha.. ask her abt all our batch nanyang girls whom i know.. most of them she knew also.. when her other project group mates S, C and JV came, they taut i was serious when i say i was "dating" SM..very easy to bluff leh..ha..she got bf liao lah..
yest after cg when SL announce the 3 cg..alot of surprise changes tat i din even know..ML and CLA all came my side while SK went over.. BK, JA all also under me.. the whole incident makes me realise 1 thing.. in life there are some things u can fight very hard to get or u can just leave it to God.. and if it is for u .. God will somehow bring it to you.. .. all these while i was like the silent lamb being bullied by the other two and i jus accepted whoever they give me though i knew it was really plain selfishness.. i was jus telling God.. whoever u give me.. i will try my best..yet in the end i got almost all the ppl i wanted.. God is really good! i was tellin AD yest that even that day after the long conf call wif charmaine and the other 2.. i really wanted to sms charmaine if i could get ML to my side .. yet in my heart i jus told God i will make do wif whoever u have given me.. and in a series of chain events due to CLA's house not being able to use for cg.. Charmaine gave ML back to my side..its really amazing.. God really know the desires of yur heart!
yest went vivo wif cg to this restaurant called 黑社会.. quite ex leh and i din think the food was very fantastic.. but it's the last time gg to fellowship wif cg so its ok lah..after that all of us went to Toy R US.. super fun loh.. recapture alot of childhood innocence..ha..took alot of fotos.. gotta wait for J to upload..
super tired and hungry when i got home ard 8pm but still force myself to go running at ntu src..cos gotta be disciplined in keepin fit.. cannot preach wat i dun practise..
chose WW, HN and ML to be my main helpers.. wanted to meet them for dinner tonight but they all not free so gotta conf call instead liao..
on wed went home then realise that i din blog.. guess i was quite busy yest..
Wed din go HCGL BS last min cos i sense my "wife" gg to have another breakdown.. quickly went to my Jalan Tukang workshop and ask bobby to help me change the cable plug which i bought from Kah Motor.. actually not difficult lah.. think few more times watchin them repair i can be car mechanic liao..touch wood..ha
After changin.. my "wife" really more power liao loh.. now easily can hit 130.. Bobby was sayin in his Malaysian accented ang moh that it has somethin to do wif the electric trasmission to the engine..
yest went to meet WW for lunch.. now the law faculty move to the former NIE/SMU campus at bukit timah.. was tellin him like that very Elitist leh..ha wanted to inspire him to have a desire to become a Cgl again cos he is afterall gg to be my main helper after multiplication and i really want him to grow strong..it was a short session but i felt i got wat i set out to do..
yest WY msg me to give her lift home.. she involved in some web radio thingy.. last time saw her frenster fotos like she got take part in some TV game show leh.. anw in the end she ended earlier than my lessons and had to go home herself.. long time din catch up wif her liao.. she abit like a little sister to me since i knew her in strikeforce 2-3 years ago..
in the end gave M lift home.. she commented i long time din drove her liao.. yah loh.. today she dressed prettier so i fetch loh..ha.. kiddin.. dun wanna complicate matters lah cos she got her KL uncfm bf but today saw her carry the book very heavy so decide to offer her a ride..
Just had company lunch at this NTU alumni clubhouse at 1 North Buona Vista.. the food ok lah.. but i think it was quite fun talkin nonsense wif the other guys in my table.. all of us ard same batch.. better than sitting wif the old fogeys then everyone uneasy and dunno wat to say..
SEL ask me to shoot video of myself for ZM's sending off.. cannot lah.. haven't prepare finish my cg sermon and offering msg.. so last min.. anw tmr gotta wake up super early to fetch him to airport.. somemore gotta pick AB up along the way..
later last cg for n280.. guess some of the ppl gg to be very sad..
I was jus readin this quote from i-weekly that i think appears in this movie 生日快乐 that stars 古天乐 and 刘若英..There are things that i care about everyday but I can only say it once a yeari think it sums up some feelings that i have.. think of watchin that show.. yeah i know its a gu niang love story but after readin the reviews i think its quite good..somemore both stars i like..
Yest nite God answered my prayers.. (see previous post)..i was vindicated from the injustice i suffered under SL and FJ.. the 3 grps were reshuffled and i got a more decent split.. glad that CL herself realise the vast disparities of the groups and 4 of us had a conf call to discuss until 2plus in the morning ..it was jus plain obvious selfishness at work in these 2 guys.. but the sad part remains that my group will still have to remain under SL in name cos CL is not confident of promoting me yet .. So it is back to usual.. doin all the work but without a title/position.. CL was sayin that a true leader does not need position or title.. haiz.. i jus gotta make do with it and hope i will be promoted soon..
i still thinkin hard abt the Enterprise IT opening.. i know that takin the job will provide me more opportunities like FJC to jump ship and break bond .. but if i gotta juggle my studies and this new position ( which is apparently very xiong judging from FJC's crazy schedule) as well as the new cg, i really dun think i can handle.. for once in my life i am not confident of handling when previously i never will reject a chance to expand my capacity and take on everythin but i guess experience have told me that i am not superman and i need to be pragmatic.. yes i can do all things thru Christ who strengthens me but i wanna focus and do things well.. not jus do them.. i jus hope the ministry promotion thing is settled by feb/march then i may apply the EIT job again then by june i can jump ship.. God .. help me!
Decide to put aside some unhappy things.. I won't let the circumstances dictate how i feel! Choose to be positive!
Anw yest had dinner wif ZM, AM and ML at this hongkong cafe at liang seah street.. ZM gg back to china for good.. still rem last time ow i always give him bs.. he's really a nice guy..in the end he treated us instead of our original intention to treat him.. but ML and i shared to buy him a shirt while AM bought him 2 books..
Last week while on leave went to NTU gym to work out.. ha.. fit bo?
Jus now realised that Principal Global Investors left a voicemail last fri..it was for the position of Fixed Income Associate that i applied but called back to be rejected.. say cos i engineering background.. what is this lah?! if they lookin for finance background experienced ppl.. then i dun think they will get alot of applicants loh since most of my class ppl also engin background..
Went to get the plug cables at Kah Motors for my "wife" then realise that got misunderstandin.. the Woon guy i talkin all along from Ubi , not Leng Kee.. but in the end i told them to bring it over to Leng kee.. will get it tmr then get my usual mechanic bobby to fix it this sat bah..
haiz.. lets start wif the bad news.. i din make it for my CFA.. i felt confident of passing leh.. why?! sianz lah..only 39% of candidates passed.. so little.. i guess our class shld have some ppl who din make it...i really feel abit lackin in confidence now lah.. everybody was sayin tat i will pass.. i also taut i will pass.. still dun understand lah..now all my plans are spoiled lah.. i will not be able to get my cfa by the time my bond ends.. forget it lah i will jus have to do without it for my job application..
i was jus thinkin abt what pastor mentioned abt abraham lincoln being failing dunno how many times before he finally succeeded.. i am not abraham lincoln but i guess its a form of encouragement.. all these while actually i taut i am quite intelligent..not ego or anythin but i guess i am pretty alright.. jus dun understand why i cannot pass this CFA thing.. jus disappointed lah but guess i will have to pick myself up and carry on loh..
Anw the good news is that Charmaine is promoting me cgl next month.. tis week i will start takin everythin wif SL supervising.. N280 will combine with W366 to multiply 3 ways where SL, FJ and me will each take one.. i was jus sharing with Charmaine that i felt challenged by God that i will excel in my studies and work even as i become busier as cgl.. i really believe we will prosper in all things as our soul prospers..
i guess thinking of the good news makes me excited already..actually sometimes its more the comparison that gets me down.. ppl gg to ask if u pass and u will feel lousy when u see many ppl.. even those non deserving.. but my God is bigger than a CFA.. i dun need a CFA to help me get an excellent job.. i believe all things are possible to him who believes!
Strength is the ability to get up after falling down..Strength is measured by how quickly u bounce back after falling down.. so wat if i failed twice? i gg to get up and run again..
Abraham, Einstein, Edison, Wesley even our own pastor failed many times before they succeed in life..but its thru their failures that they become stronger in character.. if God can do it for them, He can surely do it for me!
Did not manage to upload fotos in previous entry.. anw here they are..
Last fri at Paulener's..4A's stupid antics..tried to take "neo print".. but not very successful lah..
Finally we decided to ask the bdae gal in the next table to help us take..
Last Sat at Brown Sugar with 23rd..
Latest Scandal fueled by JH and KY.. we are innocent! anw really long time din see HJ liaoz..
Yest lessons started again wif themin's Financial Statement Analysis.. tiring lah think everybody still in holiday mood..but happy to see many of my classmates again.. S was very nice to help me photocopy the CFA notes but she looked moody yest leh.. think something happened.. wanted to ask her but no chance.. will join CT, WW and AY for the project.. all married ladies leh..ha.. actually wanted to jio C cos all these while she always do project wif me and she's very good but dun wanna seem too clingy on her leh else not sure if she is ok wif it.. anw it seems M is joining another group so i cannot reform my equity analysis group of 4 aldy.. so might as well save the trouble and join the Charlie's Angels instead..ha
FJC cfm wif a few of us same batch scholars that he breaking bond and leaving end feb.. gg to Shell sia.. haiz.. as usual there was the chant for treat next tues when we meet for lunch.. this morning met KS and he told me that BL had left liao.. that time i ask BL.. he denied loh.. KS say BL really din tell anyone until his last day.. i think its quite anti-social loh.. esp when these ppl are yur colleagues for 2 years and u din tell them anything.. also i dun understand how he pay off his 4 yrs overseas bond.. and why he did it.. 3 possibilties: 1) he struck 4D 2) he is just plain super frustrated with the system 3) he is getting double the pay at his new company that it doesn't matter anymore whatever it is, i wish BL and FJC all the best lah although i dun really like the character of both of them but i still consider them frens lah.. every father mother scholar seem to be breaking bond.. left me and KWH contemplating our fate.. KWH was sayin that he expects GLH will leave very soon too.. our group really getting smaller.. i jus dun understand where these ppl get their money to break bond from..
heard from ML that charmaine changing the leaders meeting to wed cos i started lesson this week.. a bit touched that charmaine has given me alot of chance actually .. but i guess sooner or later the meeting will have to shift to wed cos charmaine got class on tues also..
Hiaz.. my "wife" broke down again on sunday when i was on the way tog with ML to celebrate FJ's bdae after svc and bs. so we were stuck at ECP near marine parade.. Thank God that it was not some place ulu but near the chalets at East Coast Park and i manage to steer the vehicle to the side b4 the engine finally died else i would have caused a jam.Its the same problem again with the spark plug.. but the previous workshop gave me warranty.. apparently the one that he gave me previously was not of the highest quality..Called the towing which i regretted cos should have jus called my free Starcard towing and find my way to the workshop at Jalan Tukang and saved my $20..
ML was very nice and she stayed in my car to accompany me until the towing came.. the tow guy bought along his wife and kid in the front seat of the truck so miran can't hitch a ride to vivo where she was meetin her family.. so in the end she gotta cross the guard rail to get a cab at east coast park... in Charmaine's words.. it was so "unglam"..haha..felt apologetic for her lah but she was alright.. got the rare chance to catch up wif her..ha.. only in such a situation that we got to talk.. shows we really busy sia..
on fri, met up wif my sec 4 brothers at this pub call Paulener.. we gotta fight with the loud music to hear each other but the guys were really fun lah.. when i arrive at 8 after navigating the treacherous friday city traffic for 1.5hrs.. i taut i am very late liao but i was the 3rd to arrive! In the end poor SL, vice president in Citigroup, not only chopped seats for us , he also paid the bill! these ppl ah.. too much lah!ha..
At Paulener's toilet, Met one of my grand juniors there.. so qiao.. he still rem me but i forgot his name liao.. later he told me he saw me before when i came back for Mid Autumn years ago..his name was demin.. wah his memory quite good sia..Then JH came to join us after a few of the guys left..
i was the only one without a gf and so thru out the night they keep saboing me loh.. write song requests in my name.. ask for our sec3 talentime song east17's "been ard the world".. the lady say too old song she dunno how to sing.. then dunno some of them half drunk start chanting my name .. someone shouted i gay etc..haiz..but i am ok lah.. 4A guys like that one lah.. highlight of the night came when i bought a bdae gal a drink and ask for her name and number after much pressure from them.. really.. i am innocent lah.. anw i think she looks abit too young lah.. .. sms her she got reply lah but think i am not gg to pursue it lah..
On Sat, met up with council frens at this brown sugar restaurant in river valley.. think its the biggest gathering for some time liao.. almost like our belated 10th anniversary.. got 23rd extended family like YL's bf IT, BB's husband AT and HJ's fren L who came to join us.. actually all of us still look the same leh.. updated each other.. the guys recaptured some of our fun BP days back then.. JH was commenting last time like we very free like that .. always stay overnight in school or at YF's mansion.. playin soccer in inner plaza.. stripping each other in YF's pool, watching VCD at YF's living room, making prank calls with council phone and talking with "Belinda"..i think last time we really abit crazy and bo liao lah.. i was tellin JH last time too bad no digital camera but JH was sayin all these great memories were all inside our minds.. memories really are something precious that nobody can take away from u..
Yest took leave n while waitin for my car to be repaired.. went ntu gym to work out.. arms now aching loh.. then went to surf net in ntu lib.. met my ex cgm K there.. so qiao..din noe he is studyin in ntu now..it seems now i go anw will meet someone i know leh.. ha
really low on funds lah.. gotta borrow money from my mum to pay my road tax and insurance since after payin my school fees.. i really having the impetus to sell my civic esp wif it givin me so many problems but now is not right time lah esp since i gotta always rush for lessons and back home late at night.. somemore cny comin and i need to fetch my family ard.. hope after replacing the plug cables which i need to source..it wun give me any problem.. i was telling ML wif all my experience wif battery, radiator, spark plug, exhaust etc.. i can become car mechanic in no time liao.. these experiences are something those spoilt 1st hand car owners will not know how to handle..haha
jus had another interview wif director of the IT side.. actually they aldy want me.. now the onus is on me if i want anot.. jus learnt from the manager that FJC who intro me the job is leaving liao.. dunno wat lobang he got lah.. see one by one my batch scholars breakin bond and leaving.. nan dao must really thru IT route then can see greener pastures? haiz.. alot of factors i need to consider.. 1) studies startin soon 2) cgl waitin for me to take 3)my performance bonus 4) DN's job lobangs.. all the factors are interconnected.. but i gotta make a decision soon lah..
actually i think i shld let KWH made the first move for transfer and see how SY respond.. aiya i evil lah.. but it is double edged sword lah.. if he goes 1st.. i may not be able to go loh cos will have manpower shortage .. God ..help me lah.
super rainy for 2 days liao.. my car parked at hilltop.. shld not have any problem ba i hope..ha
later gg meet my 4A ppl then tmr got council gathering.. wah super long time din see many of the council ppl liao loh.. other than of cos KY and YL online lah.. was talkin to MH online last week then i ask him if he got see any of the council ppl then he say does seeing YL on TV count? ha... like that YL is closest to everyone liao loh..taut he will be close to YJ and YF but it seems that he lost contact wif them too.. MH said YF jus wanna sell insurance and YJ is too obsessed with his MLM liao..
jus received fotos for zone thanksgivin from V.. here's some:
Winner of Manhood award
I like to thank my mother, my father, my grandmother...
yest evening when i went to visit MF's father.. at the carpark of Tan Tock Seng Hospital met a roadbully.. both our cars were waitin for carpark lot.. his in front of mine but he was on the right and i was on the left.. so this car on my side between us left.. so i went in to park.. 天经地义 wat.. nothing wrong..then as i was parkin.. he came out of his white vios and pointed at me.. i wind down the window.. he say that lot is his.. i say " take loh" then he continue to go on "the lot is mine! i came first , u were behind me!".. i aldy told him to take it and he seem out to argue somemore.. again i repeated " take loh" then i just drove off..
after i make 1 turn, i immediately got another lot.. wat i cannot understand is this guy's mentality .. its jus a parking lot lah.. that lot got gold ah? My mum was telling me that mayb he is under alot of stress cos his relative in hospital or something but i felt if the other person was not a friendly paikia like me but some other dua paikia.. he will be gettin himself more unnecessary trouble over a simple carpark lot! was it worth it? if i was the guy, i jus wait for another lot loh like wat i did after my "take loh" , i found another lot immediately.. haiz.. some ppl really askin for it lah..my bro ask me to invest in a baseball bat to put in my backseat.. next time i shld jus take out the bat and say "take loh"..haha..
which reminds me of wat KY told me abt ppl tryin to extort money from her after her accident with an uncle.. told her these ppl 吃硬不吃软.. mus be paikia wif them one.. last time this ntu gal bo dai bo ji.. dunno how she reverse.. never see properly reverse into my car and my car was parked stationary in ntu hall4 carpark..Thank God i was ard that time cos i was jus exercising.. then her dad is lao paikia loh.. dun wanna pay up .. accused the workshop of ganging up wif me to cheat his money.. even want to say that he will report i was the one who banged his car from behind..i buay song so i told him that we settled it wif the insurance company loh.. in the end he settled with $2000 cos i jus paikia wif him back loh every time he called me to talk it out.. shld have been more firm lah.. cos in the end the repairs came up to more.. thru this i learnt that sometimes u gotta fight the fierce wif the fierce otherwise u gonna kanna eaten..
anw MF's dad seem much better although he still had tubes around him and he still has difficulty breathing.. I prayed for him upon his request and MF later msg us say her dad really felt much better after i prayed for him.. Praise the Lord! after that we went to foodcourt to fellowship for awhile where i taught MF abt reverse psychology...ha
jus had lunch wif DN at tiong bahru.. it was abit rush as he had to get back to office by 1pm..
Yest after work Went airport to meet DB for dinner after she had jus came back from her flight to/from Phuket..actuali stewardess not as easy as it seem lah.. if their flights are those turn around kind, they will have to stay on the plane, cannot even disembark.. sad..
went this place in tampines to eat.. down there like malay village.. all the kopitiams and shops all malay one loh.. the food was ok lah.. actuali dun think DB really like being a stewardess lah.. like wat she say she jus wanna save up enuff money to continue her studies..then in a total waste of petrol, she dun wanna go home and ask me continue drive.. drive all the way to yishun northpoint there then turn ard back to sengkang where she stayed.. along the way hear her funny stories abt "Michael Jackson" and the liang cha guy ..
yest afternoon went for interview with an IT dept proj manager..think i did well lah.. ai zai lah..this fri got another interview wif director.. today he called me again say some guy has left.. actuali i got the job aldy ..jus that now dunno if SY will release me.. actuali i also dunno if i wanna go over cos my performance ratings are comin up in 2-3mths time and my performance bonus and increment will definitely be ranked lowest if i leave..haiz.. best is that DN's frens get me a job at citigroup then i will jus leave after gettin my bonuses..God.. help me!
Very happy to hear that AB finally got a perm job.. and its in event organizing wich she really like.. ask me to fetch her every morning.. crazy lah.. like i say before i not her personal driver leh..heard from AB that JC had quitted her job to help out in family business which is some marine stuff.. i guess after her mum's health problems last year.. this was inevitable though last time JC told me b4 that she and her bro both weren't really interested in takin over the family business..but actuali i somehow felt happy for her cos i think it will be more flexible for her rather than her insurance executive job which was really crazily punishing..
later bringin the cg down to visit MF's dad at TTSH..was tellin W online that its 6 more days to end of freedom when lessons start again.. haiz.. better treasure it while i can..
yest my JC classmate SN aeroplaned me for dinner.. too much lah.. 11 years she still the same lah.. rem last time ZX always very frustrated to wait for her.. i was on the way aldy then she call say another day.. rushed back jus b4 my usual hair salon close at 8 and got my much needed hair cut.. the aunties at the salon as usual complain why i always come so late when they near closin.. but they are nice ppl lah..
MF say her dad admitted to ICU at TTS, last sunday AME's grandma also admitted hospital.. really hope they will be alright.. will get the cg to go down visit MF's dad when it is alright to do so..
realise my resurrected desktop does not have a built in 52k modem cos i guess nobody uses that now except me..ha.. but i manage to connect my laptop onto NTU 52k dialup remote access with my laptop using SEL's ntu account..now i have internet access at home finally after months!!
think recently i becoming exercise freak cos felt myself becomin abit unfit.. i have set a goal of being more disciplined in exercising in 2007.. last yr became less disciplined after my lessons started.. hope this wun happen this year else my 2.4 is gg to become even worse..
had conf call with SL and MKC.. SL was gg thru all the Xmas frens wif us.. SL asked me if Charmaine had talked to me.. i told him that in the end i din fetch her to airport cos had to fetch my parents to svc.. think Charmaine wanted to talk to me abt becomin cgl and coping with my work and studies.. really hope Charmaine will give me the chance although i know its gg to be tough lah but i think i can handle it cos i am IVAN PHANG!
Yest attended my SMU classmate CT's wedding.. she was pretty lah.. AY was shocked that CT invited me.. only to realise that i am closer to CT than she herself..ha.. the times when i and CT studied tog in lib and bo liao sms each other during lesson until some classmate think we got something.. haiz.. coincidentally her husband is also called ivan..ha
the ballroom at hotel grand park royal was abit small n squeezy lah.. the food was still alright.. CT invited me, AY, SM and WW but WW din come.. bo swee lah.. then SM left early say next day got meetin.. bo swee also lah.. so left me and AY 相依为命.. whole dinner we talk alot..talked abt AY's 爱情故事 and her naughty son.. AY is one of those pretty mama that nobody will think she is married let alone have a 1-yr old son liao.. AY said last time when class 1st started, her 1st impression of me is 坏男人..haiz..
then being the sociable me.. i got to know the others on same table as me.. there was this gal whom i found very familiar.. then later after small talk, i asked her issit she from hall 10 block 52 last time.. and true enuff!!her name was jovelin.. last time she was our hall senior who tekan us during orientation.. this world very small sia. she is also CT's jc classmate..CT only had 3 JC classmates who came.. quite sad.. next time when i marry.. my jc frens must at least fill 2 tables! my 4A frens will fill at least 1.5 tables ba i hope..
AY keep on askin me to get to know CT's jie meis who happen to be quite pretty.. why everyone think i chee hiong one leh..haiz..
anw went home super tired.. it had been another long sunday givin bs in early morning to HY, bs to AME, BW and MK after svc and then discussing abt the frens, then givin attendance, meetin DN at Peninsula, gg to Brewerkz to meet up wif NTU-CHC ppl, organized by C, then wedding.. tired loh
then somethin miraculous happened!! my PC finally resurrected.. of cos after help from this vietnamese NTU student that my mum got to help .. Thank God for Vietnamese students! now i can do stuff at home liao without havin to carry my laptop around..ha.. and all my old documents are still there cos i connected my old hard disk..
gg for interview now wif another dept's manager.. not sure if i wanna transfer to IT side lah cos jus send resume to DN who will help me forward to his frens at citigroup, HSBC and credit-suisse.. if successful then i wun need to transfer dept liao.. i jus have to break bond.. hmm.. see how lah..
Yest met up wif one of my best frens from jc ZX.. SN supposed to come too but she last min said she not feelin well cos in her words "its a woman's thing".. sorry.. can't help her there.. ha
We went to bugis V8 cafe for dinner.. Somehow like to meet up wif old frens.. alot to catch up abt latest happenings of common frens.. and the silly things we did in the past.. Wif ZX marryin next year.. which i promise to be one of his brothers.. that leaves me as the only one not married let alone attached amongst the "4 heavenly kings"..ha.. dun wanna say AE who married secretly w/o telling any of our classmates.. bo swee lah! now no more chance to suan ZX with SN aldy.. i have been suaning them for 10 yrs yet in the end it was not to be.. then both of us realise actually quite alot of ppl had a crush on SN before.. at least 5 in my class alone leh.. of cos i am not one of them.. but she so pretty meh? mayb got style lah..
too bad his gf din come else she can hear all the crazy things the 4 of us did back in jc..the most memorable for me was the time we went to AE's house overnight to help ZX "interrogate" AE if the latter also like SN..ha.. bo liao right.. then we play games, listen music, talk nonsense all night.. next mornin went Clementi Macs where we almost kanna whacked by Ah bengs.. ha.. not we paikia lah but we jus innocently eatin big breakfast when 2 gangs start fightin and we in the middle..then of cos got our usual 6th avenue 7-11 exploits before GP lesson or chemistry prac..
ZX asked me to organize 1 large scale one for whole class.. difficult lah.. last time CNY i used to be the one who brings the class to our form teacher Mrs Lim's class.. but troublesome eh..
Found 2 of my pri sch classmates on friendster!! wah think they really change alot.. yest quite bo liao.. went to search for some of my old frens and acquaintances on friendster.. alot of ppl realy change alot.. WF was lookin at the hjc school mag i bought and he said i also change alot.. i commented that his class got this gal call XL who looked quite good eh and asked him to consider leh.. alamak he said too ang moh pai for him liao..
Fetch my elder bro to SGH yest morning.. no worries.. nothin serious .. jus that he go for lasik.. now so cheap then got give sunglasses somemore.. competition tough sianow my bro yandao liao lah.. told my mum no need worry liao..cfm the sisters in his church will go crazy over him..hahah..actually my bro originally quite yandao lah except he always dun bother to take care of his skin and also dun wear nice...and basically he is more interested in playin XBox then Zabo..every year CNY he will always kanna from my 大伯 abt got gf anot, when gettin married etc..same thing over and over again macham spoilt cd player..
My mum got a student to help fix up my desktop at home.. Praise the Lord! But now the windows installation jus wun run.. haiz.. hope can get it fixed then at least i can use SEL's NTU account to access 56KB at home.. better than nothin mah..ha
DB keep talkin to me online and askin me for supper leh.. hmm.. hope not like H again leh.. dun realy know her jus that she added me frenster then add me msn.. her fotos look ok lah.. air stewardess.. but dun wanna lead ppl on leh like wat happened to me and H leh.. hope the line drawn clearly that jus frens lah..
Din blog for past 4 days.. cos those who know me knows that i have no internet access at home..haha.. call me backward but actually i have no need for internet at home since i seldom at home and also since i got smu account, mcdonalds is nearby and i can always use SEL's NTU account at ntu.. i dun really need broadband at home.. actuali i jus wanna save money lah.. call me cheapskate loh..
Anw din realise my last blog entry will be the last for 2006.. hello 2007!!
29th Dec : went company dinner.. din win anythin in the lucky draw.. my table most of the guys won something leh although the prizes not very fantastic lah.. haiz.. waste my time waitin for lucky draw.. then late for zone thanksgivin rehearsal but my timing is jus perfect lah.. i came jus in time for my part.. din even prepare any script.. din even know wat award i presentin.. then jus went on stage.. but me and SL natural lah.. we jus flow and Charmaine say ok except that i fidget too much lah.. suppose to meet DB for supper after rehearsal but she live sengkang.. too far lah.. told her another time lah..
30th Dec: zone thanksgiving went well lah except had some disagreement wif ML..won the "Manhood award" ..ha..btw its not some viagra award .. my W283 ppl still support me alot.. when i won,LK and the rest went crazy screaming.. think i am quite a natural compere.. the portion i presented went well lah.. think i worked the crowd..ha..anw ML won the "Awesome Award" which is the best of the best lah.. last year i was nominated and K won but this year both ML and SEL were nominated and i was not.. was tellin E that if not for the AM incident. things would have been different but forget it lah.. ML and SEL will never realise that I have always been shielding them all these while when we were in W283..
Too bad SEL had to rush off for a concert.. else 4 of us can take foto tog..N280 wasn't even nominated for "Jerusalum CG" award .. think its a wakeup call for all of them lah..
31st Dec: Last Church service for the year.. sang "Auld Lang Syne" as usual.. .. pastor announced our record Xmas attendance of 45333.. we made it and God did beyond our expectations!!.. we are really a large , happy church family.. gave a solid bs to BW, MK and AME after svc.. it was one of my longest bs but i hope it really encouraged them for the new year ahead esp since all 3 of them have jus joined us in the past year..
my Panasonic handphone died ( really short battery life lah panasonic) and i had to go home to charge since i needed to submit attendance to AM by 5pm.. fetch all 3 of them home or to mrt.. then pick up my parents at bukit merah.. then chong home to charge hp.. jus in time..
then rush out of house again to MK's house at YCK for steamboat. abt 12 of us lah.. it was quite fun ah.. KL's fren B and KK's gf YZ joined us.. everyone esp MF was fascinated with MK's garfield lookalike persian cat and his growling siberian husky.. then AD's 欠扁 question on the surname of the "happy" nurse that caused us to eat our fishballs..and everyone respondin to pastor's call to eat more vegetables..ha
fetch KL, MF and B to city hall then went to maxwell Party World 茶人之家 to join AB and gang for JK's bdae and new year countdown.. JC was there.. everytime jolin's song come out .. the rest will ask her to sing and dance.. actually AB told me she will be comin so i not so surprised.. mayb she more surprised to see me lah.. her singing as usual abit off..ha.. actually i rem she said before she abit tone deaf..
at 1130pm.. they gave JK a cake with supposedly unextingushable candles.. but in the end Jk managed to snuff them out lah after much efforts.. they sprayed the usual stuff on him.. the whole room was in a mess lah.. 幸好 i managed to siam before they start sprayin since i was sittin beside him before that.... JC left after that cos she got another gatherin.. bad time to leave lah.. in the end she gotta count down with the taxi driver.. ha.. din know she not drivin and she gg Jurong until YY told me.. i could have given her a lift mah since E's gathering was at bukit batok..
At countdown, everyone jus went crazy lah.. the 4 gals started to wrestle wif each other.. dunno wat they tryin to do.. the guys like S and D jus continue to sing and shout loudly.. .. the gals abit narcisstic esp wif AB ard.. dunno take how many million fotos.. after ktv..they wanted to sabo JK again then it got abit ugly lah cos JK became 不爽.. haiz.. the atmosphere then became abit weird..anw we split into my car and YY's car and went selegie to eat some Rochor road 豆浆油条.. down there was crowded loh.. everyone park illegally loh..the 豆浆油条 was nice lah.. D was so hungry, kept eating..
Fetched D, AB, JK and JS home after that.. JK like super sleepy and moody throughout.. later after droppin D and Jk off, nearing JS's home, JK called AB.. then AB got abit 不爽 over the phone..haiz.. its the issue between AB and JK again lah.. think AB should jus plainly tell Jk that she is not with ZW or anyone else but Jk and her is inpossible.. the longer this drags, the more miserable JK is gg to feel.. i feel AB is not good, leadin guys like ZW, YY and JK on like that when all along she only likes J.. wat kind of mind games she playin? why my biaomei like that?
anw she says YY and ZW both like JC.. think AB expected some response from me lah but i jus told her say so be it loh.. no wonder saw YY got sms and call her jus now while in ktv after she left.. actually i dunno if it really matters to me or JC anot lah..chinese sayin..命里有时终须有，命里无时莫强求..是你的就是你的， 不是你的就不是你的.. this complicated issue between us has been gg on so many yrs.. it doesn;t really matter any more lah..
1st Jan: Went East Coast cycling with E and his gf S.. piangz.. East Coast was super crowded loh.. macham CBD.. had to park super far away and walk back..S was quite ok wif me joining them although i keep apologising for being too bright..haha..guess its healthy for couples to have ppl to join them otherwise it gets abit boring lah..we then went to Changi Village to have dinner at this Tiong Bahru Boneless Chicken.. it was nice lah.. highly recommended...
2nd Jan: Wanted to go out wif ZX but he was not free.. so we fix on this thu instead.. in then end met up with my "姐" HY at jurong east.. long time din meet her liao.. discussed her job predicament wif her.. advised her to leave but not sure if she will take my advice.. she told me SL and DT were finally marrying this year.. its about time lah.. 10 years liao loh.. they are really the longest couple i know that have not married..
then i kanna my first parking fine of the year! sad lah... $50 .. din noe Jurong east Fatimah so siao on loh.. haiz.. went to meet E at Marina to watch Borat.. it was very funny and insulting lah.. not to mention crude.. but i was tellin E that the reason he is insulting the Jews when he himself is a Jew is bcos he is making a satirical.. its like sayin 反话.. he was showing how evil and dumb ppl can get with their prejudices against Jews, prostitutes, blacks etc..if we can see beyond all the silly jokes and insults, His Borat character is actually representative of all the bias and ugly mindsets that ppl have towards different groups of ppl like the feminists, the gays etc.. ..either that or i think too much and actually this Borat actor( can't rem his exact name) is jus one shallow comedienne.. but i prefer to think otherwise..
E was sick so he went home after show.. i jus aimlessly walk ard the area and bumped into my old NTU fren HY.. i was listening to cd at HMV at citilink when our eyes met..ha.. seems he was in china for some time after he graduated.. no wonder.. he also gg to apply MFE in NUS and had went for citibank MA program application but of cos he din get in cos my SMU classmate SH got it (like mentioned in earlier entry) and they only chose 1 person this time which makes me even more amazed how SH got it! exchanged nos wif HY and i continued to walk ard abit more..
Not sure wat 2007 gg to hold for me.. most imptly is that i need to grad from my masters course and hopefully get a job offer ( better still if MA) at any of the banks..
Anw to all my frens reading.. have a great year ahead! God Bless!=)
Yest din blog cos busy tryin to get my car fixed.. Thank God I was on leave but waste my leave on repair car lah..
After my last blog entry.. wanted to leave ntu then my car cannot start! Pengz.. actually it started then it suddenly died and cannot resurrect from then on.. no matter how i turned the key.. it jus wun start.. i know it was not the battery problem cos the lights and stereo were still functioning.. and a died battery is no problem to me cos it happened to me 3 times liao. jus ask a passerby car and jump start loh.. but this time it is something to do wif the spark plug ..
Jus left my car overnight at ntu carpark B cos so late aldy call towing also no place to tow to.. went to ask the ntu carpark ppl if the tow truck can enter carpark B.. they say never happened before..ha.. at least i am part of history leh
Next day.. tried to start the car in the hope that mayb it was bcos weather cold but it still wun start.. just alot of growling noise only.. had to give retention report to charmaine first.. had to give before 12pm then everyone includin helpers all dun reply smses or call.. few hrs later then call or sms me back.. whats the point? sometimes i think i am running N280 by myself. SL is the leader yet everythin i am doin everythin.. he din even send me the report he told me he would.. what is this lah? I am doin the work without the authority.. haiz.. suan le..
after submittin report, went to call the Starcard free towing.. amazing the tow guy din have much trouble findin his way to carpark B.. guess my instructions were quite good.. told the carpark guy and he jus opened the gantry so my carpark fees for parkin overnight were waived..ha.. also there weren;t many cars since now holidays so the towing went ahead smoothly without us obstructing any traffic..
the tow guy marcus was friendly lah. actually i seem to be able to get along with all these ah bengs sort of ppl than corporate suit and tie hypocrites.. although they are lowly educated.. this marcus left school in primary 4.. they are very open and straightforward.. he shared wif me his story abt his rags to riches and then to rags again story and he is only 28!..he is someone wif alot of drive lah.. he still owes the banks hundred of thousands dollars and slowly payin them off.. but he is full of optimism.. i encouraged him and told him that one day i believe he will 东山再起 and his wife is a thai.. i think he realise that no singapore gal is gg to fall for a lowly educated guy like him..another case of foreign brides.. but he is a street smart guy lah.. i really believe he can go far in life..
went to this workshop in some ulu part of jurong call lorong tukang.. sugest if u are a gal.. dun go to this place alone. the workshop guy say its the liquid filter battery dead and have to replace but need to "order".. after dealin wif workshop ppl for so long, i know their definition of "order" is to get it second hand from some other car or workshop..told the guy to help me check out my aircon and fill the coolant too ..
left the car there.. felt abit helpless without my "wife".. din take bus and mrt for long time liao..ha.. Thank God my EZ link still got money.. went to jus walk ard JP and JEC.. JEC now change quite abit leh.. not been there for long time..wanted to watch Borat but it was not showin at either..so jus went JE library. Yes Library! got problem? i intellectual kind one leh..
and when i am in library, a place supposed to keep quiet, so many ppl called me! KL, D, AB all called me to chit chat.. funny lah normal time din call me.. when i in lib then everybody call me together.
borrowed 5 books.. not even sure if i can finish lah.. always kanna fine for being over ambitious ..AB told me she failed her Maths .. haiz.. like what i mentioned in an earlier post i was sayin that if she dun work hard she not gg to pass.. told her straight off that so many times i want to help her but she herself so choosy on time etc.. haiz.. some ppl jus dunno how to think wats good for them.. .. if u r lazy, give u the best teacher, best study conditions etc u still gg to fail.. its simple as that..
the workshop guy bobby came to jw to pick me up to go back to the workshop. taut he was gg to drive my civic back to my house..miscom.. anw again tis guy is a Malaysian beng.. a one stop car repair person.. anythin he also got lobang.. again found it very easy to talk to him although his english pronunciation abit jialat.. sometimes gotta ask him repeat before i know wat he is sayin..
anw the engin can start. the aircon is cold again.. at cost of $190.. guess it will cost much more if i had gone to STAR.. ask bobby that i may find him again to change the exhaust.. changin my exhaust was the worst decision i made for my car.. gave me so much trouble that now i wanna change it back to original...
Saw this late korean movie on tv call "public enemy".. its PG rated.. violent and funny loh.. its abt this paikia cop that resembles Mel Gibson in lethal weapon..Sms my ex ntu classmate TH.. she super dao lah.. always dun reply my sms, email or friendster msg.. am i tryin too hard? if she think i tryin to chase her then she is abit too thick skinned lah..haiz.. suan le.. i jus have to accept that some frens jus dun wanna keep contact wif u . such as AT, MH, JC, WY...
Gg for company dinner later at Village then rehearsal for zone thanksgivin at JW. think everyone at my workplace on screensaver mode liao..
Yest went with one of my best fren E to watch 黄金甲 at cineleisure.. the Orchard Road Jam is as usual bad even on a weekday like yest.. also bcos of the heavy rain bah.. it rained non stop for the whole day yest.. taut some places in Singapore gonna flood but no flood leh...
Went to hongkong cafe 兴旺, really long time din catch up with E already..since he got attached..ha..( right, bro?) definitely will help him knock down doors when he gets married..ha..( before 2008 right?).. that means he can't be my best man when i married lah..haiz..
actually, honestly 黄金甲 is not worth the 4 stars that reviews gave it leh..too much melodrama lah.. maybe gals will like it.. but halfway thru the show i was aldy complaining to E. where is the action?? But the action when it comes is really fast , furious and bloody lah... 张导演.. must have more action lah! i think 墨攻 was really nicer leh..more action and strategy..
i am at my wits end lah.. seems H cannot get over it leh.. haiz.. what is the answer she is looking for? somethings cannot be spelt out too clearly lah.. better left unsaid.. if she continue to sms/call me, it is still the same.. some things dun need to be black or white mah.. just leave things as they are..it is partly my fault too lah.. who ask me so yandao?..haha..kiddin lah! yandao also not as yandao as our church W lah.. like E was sayin, 5 out of 10 sisters in our church prob have a crush on W lah..and it is not helpin the situation by havin him appear almost every week for our church video announcements..ha
Clearing leave today and coincidentally my exhuast pipe broke again for the dunno-how-many time.. went to STAR to do the welding.. the guy there say better get a new car.. wah piangz.. i must thank him for seein me up... in the morning i jus borrowed $1500 to top up to pay my comin sem school fees for my MSc course.. do i look like i am rich? mayb he is prophesying into my future as an trader when the BMW and the lexus all come in.. ha.. no matter wat i drive next time, i will always rem my first "wife" - my honda which put me thru trials and tribulations but i still love her very much! ha..
then after that i did the one thing i wanted to do for a long time.. i went Clementi KBox on my own to sing!.. ha.. not that i loner.. (anw at 130pm on weekday, nobody is gg to go KBox wif u...) but always when u go karraoke.. everybody gotta wait for the mike.. today the mike is all mine!! ha.. i sang for ard 2 hrs bah..felt it was too short.. wanted to extend leh but had to do other stuff like gettin fotos of BW and MK for AM for zone thanksgivin..
went smu then the websites all lagging.. smu sent an email that due to taiwan earthquake, some of the comm lines destroyed and hence lagging.. waste of time.. din get anythin done as i cannot access my mail..
i hang ard suntec and marina to wait for bs and ldrs meeting..then Charmaine sms say no bs as she sick.. so i taut still got ldrs meetin and waited.. then sms AM to ask her if still got meeting.. she din reply.. later she said she tried to call me office phone but i din pick up.. learned from miran that Charmaine sms them abt the retention report and no meeting today.. again i din receive sms and nobody told me!! dunno how many times this has occurred in the past 1 week.. causing me to do alot of last min stuff..haiz. why like that?
Then all my helpers din follow up on the frens.. why like that? i really give it to them lah.. i dun need ppl who jus give me the usual stuff.. anybody can do that.. told them if like that N280 forever will remain stagnant!! All our Xmas harvest will go down the drain..
frustrated day at ministry lah.. but i am cool.. think blogging is a good outlet to let it out..
Jio YL eat supper.. she say her bf waitin for her eat dinner after her work.. wah her bf quite cham lah.. like that every night hungry..she say its "tortuous love" .. hmm actually i every night also eat dinner at 10 plus 11 plus.. wif all my smu lessons and church meetings.. even right now 1115pm jus finish giving AM forecast.. and i am typin this blog.. i not yet eat dinner and am super hungry loh..
Super busy during the Xmas weekend that just passed.. but i guess its nothing compared to some others like usher..
Was so exhausted yest that i din go anywhere but home to sleep.. was so caught up doin stuff that i din rem to take any fotos of the beautiful candle light service , xmas drama or xmas carnival or wif my N280.. haiz.. wasted kodak moments lah..
Fri after meetin at church office, went dinner/supper wif FJ at JW492, really got to know him alot better..Busy coordinating all the cg stuff until 3am..
Sat - received news last min that need to cut ppl for Service1- overflow by 8000..all the news never reach me until AM call me to hound me .. haiz.. dunno why SL always never inform me..
I was called to help Coupon Booth.. dun understand why in the end AD told charmaine that she can help coupon booth as well, leavin poor MK alone to handle all the frens..and she din provide any soln to MK.. i gotta step in to ask MF to come down to help out.. i always believe if u create a problem .. u provide a solution to the problem u create.. . just like in soccer, if u lose the ball, u chong until u win the ball back..
my partner at the booth was this yandao bro call dray..anw in the end our booth sold the most amt of coupons.. and an auspicious number too.. $888 of coupons.. haha.. we wanted to hit $1000 but Charmaine came to count the money before we could fulfill our goal.. according to personal research.. this is the highest amt collected for the diff shifts and booths.. dray joked it must be due to the 3 of us yandaos..haha ( includin the security brother helpin us guard the money)
Hang around wif the cg frens and members that came for first service.. DZ really got alot of stupid tricks to 耍 ppl..went to play the carnival games, DZ won the air rifle game, K won a tweety bird key chain and pooh bear in the basketball game but subsequently he lost form and nvr won anythin .. wasted my $9 lah.. Gave B and XL lift back home
Sunday: C put me aeroplane lah.. said wanna come see my church xmas drama, arrange so much on time and place to meet. i somemore woke up early jus to bring her down else i dun need to go service 3 as i have told WW and N to take care of the ppl.. then she last min sms me say not comin.. too drunk.. wat kind of reason is this lah.. i feel some ppl bo sim is bo sim lah.. like i mention b4, one kind of ppl i dislike are those who dun honour their word and jus waste ppl time.. the worst thing is that she herself was a christian and told me so many times she wanna come back church yet she cannot even commit to a simple appointment like this ..and its Xmas somemore! 2 things show from this incident : 1) talk is cheap, she doesn't really mean wat she said 2) she doesn't respect ppl's time
the transition between third and fourth service was the most chaotic as we got alot of frens comin for S4.. then i begin to see the traits of AD that made Charmaine and SL to request her to take a step back from ministry.. haiz.. basically she is a person who jus "arrows".. i feel one should always lead by example.. nobody respects a "middle man" and i dun need a "middle man" to just relay orders.. i respect the fact that she was once my leader but now things are changed and i think she is still not adept to this fact..
anw some of the frens din come..the xmas drama was funny yet touching lah.. think it was very creative they made it into a news and talk show format.... the candlelight service was beautiful as usual.. the frens who came alot of them responded to the altar call... 9 in total.. i was most happy that ZW whom i invited responded.. i know the message abt "being hurt by imperfect ppl" really spoke to him...went to carnival and the ppl all came to me to sponsor them coupons.. being the good big brother i was ..haha.. of cos i obliged..
went to dinner wif rest of zone leaders at crystal jade at plaza sing. taut orchard road was closed so parked at smu and walked over in the rain..in the end found out from SH that still can exit at cairnhill..haiz..then again last min AM say mus submit forecast and attendance and i gotta rush to do it.. again SL din tell me .. dunno happen how many times this whole week liao.. the dinner atmosphere was abit funny.. YJ's gf JL who came to join us like very quiet.. then SL like got some personal problem.. but towards the end it was better when we exchange gifts..we gotta descibe the person that we were buyin gifts for and the rest had to guess.. mine was easy cos everybody knows our boss Charmaine.. EDW descibed me as "humble" and everybody could guess it was me.. din noe i gave others the impression of being humble.. Charmaine quite like the Mango perfume and shades i got for her but i think she liked the Guess bag that we all got for her more.. i got a yellow polo tee from EDW.. its really quite nice.. like it alot that i wear it for service yest..actually wanted to watch movie wif the rest of them but in the end jus too tired and so went back..
then XL cannot find his way home and i gotta drive to Jurong East and fetch him back.. i gave him a firm lesson on knowing how to be responsible for his own life.. he is already 16 yrs old and he can tell me he wanna get a gf when he doesn;t even know how to take care of himself!he is not mentally challenged, just plain spoilt and attention-seeking...i told him it is time he grows up and becomes a man.. i told him that when i was in primary 4 . i already learned to wake up at 530am in the morning to change 3 buses to get to school and back.. and he is already 16 yrs old yet he still needs my cg ppl to tell him how to get to the mrt, how to get to expo etc.. what is this?? i really gave it to him.. i told MK to talk to him later.. but i want him to know the point i was comin from.. i was not angry i had to go and fetch him.. but i was angry at the fact that he has not grown up and if i dun wake up his "idle", when is he gg to realise that he cannot continue to live like this?
Monday: fetched my parents down for service.. at first my mum was not feeling alright and din wanna go.. but after praying for her, she was better and i think the message of finding the peace of God really spoke to her.. Priase God!
Went to Tanjong Katong area where our old church building Hollywood was .. not to reminsce abt old times but bcos my mum wanted to go there to shop! of all places.. i was jus plain bored lah... our Hollywood building was now a Sheng Siong supermarket.. i can still rem where our entrance, our stage etc was...those were the days lah..
Thank God my mum din shop long else i will be super bored.. met my SMU classmate H while eatin wif my parents at the hawker centre there.. i was so tired that i concussed when i got home.. asked AB if she still having her Xmas celebration that she jioed but she replied that the ushers and security are too worn out aldy.. think all of us jus need some rest..
woke up and played xbox wif my brother.. long time din have such fun wif him liao.. saw him played "Black" and played "Need for speed" with him.. i guess it was quite a family time for me this xmas..
H was disppointed that i din get her any gift for xmas or we din get to meet.. honestly i din have any time.. anw our sms reached the point that it is obvious she is sayin something lah..jus msn her and clarified things..hope she is alright.. she is realy a nice gal lah but i guess not for me ah.. since the dinner incident, WH has also stopped smsing me liao lah.. think this is the season for me when the everything is clarified.. 不拖不欠
T and SX comin for my church Xmas svc over this comin weekend..still got K and SM not cfm wif me.. hope they will come.. SX like not very keen .. over the years always put me aeroplane.. suprised that ZW msn me on his own to say he wanna come.. saw that BK passed his N levels.. so happy for him..
SX finally wrote a frenster testi for me like he promised ages ago.. he is really the longest fren i have since pri sch.. though we are poles apart in our characters and values, i am amazed how we have remained good brothers all these years..
think everyone is in the Christmasy mood.. supposed to attend my company Xmas function at this very moment but late abit never mind lah cos DD will say some 废话 in the beginning.. alot of my colleagues not gg.. then WH chao geng.. today take MC.. haiz.. hope SY not there lah.. else i same team wif SY.. abit funny..
recently got this forum entry abt someone soliciting funds from the public in the name of our church.. there it goes again..树大招风.. in all my years in church.. our church have never raise public fund raising events for our own benefit.. Never.. all our building funds, mission funds, tsunami relief, easter giving to the poor etc come from our own giving and offering..either that guy is out to smear our name or he is genuinely tryin to warn us that someone is misusing our church name..
and the next day Urban condemned Sun for her dress sense.. haiz.. all these must come at this Xmas time.. hope pastor is ok lah..Like wat pastor preached last weekend Strength is the capacity to accept failure and pick yurself up to move on..
Over the years, all the allegations and bad things said against our church have 不攻自破 and we have grown stronger and more united as a family thru these trials.. 清者自清.. God will always bring out the truth in the end
Anw wishin all those reading my blog a merry Xmas! SMS/Call me at 97473910 if u wanna come my church Xmas drama and candlelight service + carnival at expo.. I will more than glad to welcome u! =)
Went to do some HR survey for scholars .. can take time off to "twang".. ha.. in the end only got me and WT there.. when i was leaving, realise the husband and wife team drive a Jaguar!! and their comapny is jus helpin companies to do organizational behavioural models.. can earn so much ah? it makes me realise to make it rich.. u really need to do yur own business..workin for others is not a viable option..
Went to city hall to meet CT, SM, W and H for lunch at New York.. the food there is not bad.. but i think more importantly really gotta know all of them.. and it turns out CT, SM and W were all previously from FCBC! so qiao.. W gg wif his gf to Bali over the weekend.. how nice.. thinkin of gg on a short holiday too leh.. mayb after new year.. but go wif who? everyone so busy.. haiz..
These few days it has been raining quite alot..if no need to come work.. so nice to sleep lah..
Yest met ML for dinner at Wisma then went to shop for my ZS's xmas present.. Thank God ML was wif me else i will be totally clueless.. but she made me wait for 45 mins at wisma! too much lah .. ML still the same.. always late..
In the end bought this Mango perfume and sunglass package that looks really nice and its not very ex.. sisters like ML know all these lobangs one ah.. all these years that i know ML.. she is really a sister who is very good at gu niang stuff like shopping/buying/wrapping gifts, cooking.. aiya basically things i am not good at lah..
then we went back wisma food court for dessert.. met my SMU classmates W, CT and SM there.. so qiao! they went for the career talk and were there to have dinner...but W was wif his gf , separate from CT and SM... CT and SM were jus sittin 2 tables away in the same row as me.. they say i was too engrossed talkin to ML that i din see them.. if W had not called me.. and told me that they were there. i really may not see them..after ML left to meet her best fren EL, i stayed behind to chat wif both gals.. then W pass by to say good bye.. his gf pretty lah.. but we taut she looks abit young leh.. W cradle snatcher lah..haha Had quite a good time chattin with both of them.. usually during lesson dun really have chance to talk..prob meetin them for lunch together wif W at New York-New York this fri..
Xmas is comin.. which means super busy time again wif all the forecasts n all the admin and multiple svcs..
Fri went to Orchard to meet up wif H.. it was crazy traffic there loh.. cannot even cut lanes to go into taka or heeren and cineleisure carpark full.. in the end gotta go 1 round to come back taka again.. but Praise the Lord that managed to get parkin space eventually.. H gotta wait for me for ard 45 mins.. super paisay to her lah..
then both of us super busy gettin our own forecasts right for 10pm dateline then we were jus busily calling and smsing ppl while at MOS burger.. saw this gal that sit beside H.. i know her from somewhere..very familiar but cannot recall who she is .. i think she also found me familiar cos i noticed she got look at me too.. really old liao lah.. cannot recall.. as she was quite pretty and had frens wif her and also H was wif me, i din go up and ask her.. ha.. if H not ard mayb i will.. still thinkin who she is..haiz..
needed to get a gift for cg gift exchange..so quickly rushed to taka gift section after our meal.. then i cfm somethin that i realise a long time ago.. SL is really much less organized than AM which can be a good or bad thing sepending on how u see it..ha..the day before he din tell me to send forecast to AM then i got blasted by AM.. then that day same thing again and this time he din tell me to send to V cos AM unavailable that day..then he ask me organize a conf call yet he himself cannot make it at 11pm.. haiz..
anw to cut story short i gotta resend and retype the forecast 4 times bcos SL din give me details.. and had to stay up till 230am cos SL din reply my sms.. haiz.. trials and tribulations lah.. anw when i was retypin and resendin sms.. ask H to help me look for gift.. then she din.. haiz..ask me to look myself.. jus a simple gift also she cannot help me then how?
Startin to feel abit pressured by her lah.. i think she is a little controlling ah.. will keep sms me when i din reply her sms even when there is no need to.. keep hinting for me to get her xmas present and flowers.. haiz.. yest i was jus super tired after long day then she sms me to ask me share abt my day.. alamak all i want is to jus sleep.. then she ask is it somethin wrong betw us.. actually i think i gotta make it clear to her again we are jus frens lah b4 this gets too serious..
AD msg me late that night say that Charmaine spoke to her and AD will be takin a step back from ministry to focus on her career.. this means more busy time for me.. dunno if i can cope when school reopens in January..think its gonna be xiong..I replied to encourage her.. she is a good leader lah but jus that many times she really unavailable..
Sat was also another long day.. went WW's condo at 10am to prac for performance.. then the actual Xmas party which turned out well..the performances were good although for chasing cars 3 of us were abit diff speeds.. think SL aimed at the few RI boys who really showed quite some attitude.. too intellectual aldy lah.. but WC is good lah.. he has been attendin cg and svc consistently without anyone invitin for past 2 weeks.. he is like another BW but i think even more intellectual.. yest when i spoke to him.. he seems interested in gettin bs.. for every few bad fruits.. u will get a super good fruit lah.. and i think WC is quite a good fruit lah..
then went svc wif CL, SK and KL. then had meetin with Charmaine and other leaders until 11pm then went home sleep. Talked to WW abt his team.. PB and CL whom he din really followed up.. his attitude is ok lah.. guess have to give him benefit of doubt that he was really very busy wif SF performaces at St James Power Station..
AB called me to complain abt SEL.. i jus try to calm her down lah..
Sun another busy day.. first thing early in morning i had to be family middle man again for my mum and dad.. Seems like everytime got quarrel i am the person in the family who has to settle it.. thats wat i dun like abt my elder bro .. cos he never steps in to help..mayb he got his reasons lah but he is afterall the elder bro.. haiz.. sometimes i really feel i shld be the elder bro instead of him..
after svc suppose to give bs to MK and YB but both had to attend briefing for Children Church Xmas celebration so no time.. managed to talk to BC abt my parents and their future in his cg.. he really looks quite drained ah after his wife's miscarriage.. tried to encourage and comfort him.. then had to rush to get coupon tics for the Xmas Carnival. thank God met SEL there who helped me buy else the queue was super long loh.. then draw lots for zone leaders gift exchange and i drew myself.. wah how coincidental..then redraw and i got Charmaine.. wah piangz.. stressed.. but thank God msn ML to go shoppin wif me later after work to get present else i totally clueless loh..
ML is really a fren that can help me lah.. all these while back in W283 she was someone whom i always can count on to get things done.. and if i wanna get a gf.. i will get one who can help me and of cos i can help her.. not one who cannot even help me get a simple gift like H..
after gettin tics.. keng gai abit wif MK and YB before their briefing.. then coincidentally met AB and JSC..think they jus finish some usher meetin.. AB started complaining to me abt SEL again .. told her SEL helped me get tics leh so i gotta try to defend her ..haha.. then realise JC was jus sittin beside AB.. din talk to JC lah cos she was talkin to someone else and AB was complainin to me non-stop..as usual JC got the tired, buay song look on her face.. think i am the only guy who finds that pretty lah..ha
then met D and YF and talked awhile wif them.. seems like i met alot of ppl yest! like i say in earlier post.. Xmas is a time of reunion wif old frens.. on the way to my car.. met E! yes .. my yandao fren ( ha.. cos he shld be readin this..)
actually wanted to go home then in the end i did admin and forecasts all while in the car for 2 hrs! i also cannot believe it lah but its true.. when u really engrossed in doin things, time pass very fast.. in the end too tired liao.. din go dinner wif AB and gang..went home and concuss until 845 and watch 十面埋伏 on Channel U.. it was a solid show lah!! makes me wanna watch 黄金甲 even more since also directed by Zhang Yimou.
today WH asked me to go help her clean her house.. wah piangz.. told her this ahmad only drive .. dun clean house one leh..ha
recently i have been talkin and meetin up alot of old frens.. guess its the time of the year when u reminsce abt old times..yest online talked to CE.. she said that it has been 2 yrs since i talked to her.. got so long meh? last time during attachment, i was quite close to her but somehow lost contact thru the years. still rem my 2 IA buddies TJ and BH keep askin me to chase her.. haiz.. those were the days when 3 of us huddled up in the super cold room , kanna tekan by that sadistic supervisor.. still bitter that after so much hard work he gave me a "C".. caused me to hate IT so much since then..anw CE is workin at HP.. very near to my workplace.. hope can meet up for lunch 1 day..
smsed AT.. got his number from YJ whom i met at LC's weddin.. again used to be very close to my "partner" back during Council days.. but over the years also lost contact .. think i last saw him during last year CFA exams.. he din reply me leh.. mayb he overseas lah..
Yest on the way home ..heard this song by 宇恒 - 依然是朋友 twice back to back over 933 and 972.. its a song i gotta know that time when W283 went kbox and YO sang it..
情人节的前一天 他离开你身边
只剩下你无止境的想念
那一夜我陪着你 你哭了一整夜
你是否知道 我对他一样很想念
直到有一天 我和他碰面
在那间 我们常去的咖啡店
才知道 有些感受
我和他谁都不曾说出口
我们之间 隐藏了什么
除了我自己没人懂
可是你 你怎么说 你知道后是不是从此避开我
oh~~我一样难过 多希望我们不曾相识过
才知道 有些感受
我和他谁都不曾说出口
我们都是最好的朋友
谁会有勇气去开口
不再哭 不再难过
我们还有好大好大的天空 Oh~~
故事的最后 我们都不曾失去过什么
我们依然是朋友
aiya.. can't post the mtv up.. anw 宇恒 looks quite pretty in it lah..
才知道 有些感受 我和他谁都不曾说出口 我们之间 隐藏了什么 除了我自己没人懂.. sad lah..like wat i say in a previous post..saw this shoutout from somebody's frenster.. Many of the unhappinesss in this world comes from things left unsaid
Yest attended Charmaine's bs on compatibilty time bombs.. it was good lah.. think i can be a good counselor..that time S asked me why i can offer good relationship advice when i myself have not been in any relationship before.. ha.. cos i always get to hear members' problems and experiences and also thru bs like this..
CT invited me to her weddin on 7th Jan.. meaning i got 2 weddings back to back with ZF's one on 6th.. CT said that she will intro her jie-meis to me.. wah piangz i so hum sup meh? seems like i am the only male classmate she inviting..
Got my new timetable for next sem .. as usual looks xiong lah.. haiz another session of accounting comin with TM.. actually i dun really like his teachin style.. i dun like it but i must learn to enjoy it else i not gonna do well like last sem..
yest talked to quite a number of ppl over the phone.. jus as i suspected.. T got a problem wif AM lah.. but i jus told him that it was not AM who asked me to call him but i did it on my own accord.. no matter how attitude he is.. i was the one who got him back so now i will be the one again..
then XL abit attitude lah.. usually see her guai guai kind.. think MF was abit harsh on her but MF had good intentions.. it jus show that XL has low capacity lah..how to rise up? she say she got 2nd call then later din call me back or return my sms..HP also off.. i sms her that if she has somethin against MF then she shld jus say it and i settle it betw both of them.. i will not be biased to MF jus bcos she is helper..in fact i told MF to apologise even if MF feels she was not in the wrong.. if XL doesn't accept the apology then she really has a problem..
K keeps tellin me he wanna rise up.. but he dun attend pm..never tell me he attendin cg, pm or svc.. not accountable abt his life.. how to rise up? sometimes it is not a matter of jus wanting something.. u must prove and show that u are serious..
yur desire is proven by yur actions.. it is same in church, in yur workplace, in yur relationships..that day someone was tellin me that her bf dun seem to have intention of marrying her ( no names mention as the person may b reading this..oops) sad to say but honestly i think he is not really into you and the relationship is heading nowhere..i once heard that one of ex classmates propose 5 times to his gf but each time she was not ready to commit and in the end the gal broke up wif him after 6 years.. 6 years leh!why wait 6 years to realise its not gg to amount to anythin.. if she really love him..he doesn't need 5 times lah..i feel sad for this ex classmate..
i think this is a human character flaw inherent in alot of us.. that we like to hold onto things even if rationally we know it is leading to nowhere.. be it in a relationship , a career or anythin.. its the same mentality that lead gamblers to hugh losses..
Here's a group of Ah Peks who are jus simply fun to be with..
aiya can't post the video of us forcin LC to drink our "December Delight" but he was quite sporting lah..
Yest applied for this Management Associate position at Standard Chartered after seeing the email sent to all the Masters students from SMU Office of Career Services.. hope to be able to get an interview lah.. heard our senior batch managed to secure the jobs they want..if successful then i dun need to transfer to IT dept liao.. leave directly can aldy..yeah! God help me!
Yest as usual prayer meet and leaders meetin until very late.. SL spoke to me abt WH..seemed she is a very careful person as alot of guys ask her out before.. but i never really have any intention.. it was jus a dinner.. haiz.. SL told me to keep things low betw us for now so that things will jus die off..actuali sometimes i think WH is quite pressurized bcos of who she is, her sister and brother-in-law are all quite high profile and she always has to act in a manner that is "appropriate".. makin it difficult to be who she really is n difficult to form meaningful relationships wif ppl ard her.. my dinner experience wif her this time is jus an example..she has to be "accountable" to the extreme sense that even a simple dinner becomes not so simple.. haiz.. it is quite sad for her and at the same time frustrating to ppl like me who jus wanna be her friend..
Yest wanted to have dinner wif H but i think she was angry at my non-reply and in the end arranged to have dinner with V. She asked me to join them but i declined lah.. dun wanna spoil their romantic date..ha.. H scolded me for implying that she lesbian..
haiz..i know H tryin to say somethin lah wif all the hints..read her blog also know she is talkin abt me.. i also dunno how lah.. its complicated..
i jus sms WH to see if she free to have dinner.. being WH i taut she will jus outright say no but surprisingly she ok wif it although i ask her to go meet her other fren if she had not seen him/her for long time.. in the end went all the way to bedok where she stayed.. due to our status in church.. she told me to account to our respective ZS..so i jus sms charmaine.. charmaine din reply leh.. dunno she will talk to me after leaders meetin today anot.. WH was sayin mayb i wun even get to attend meetin today.. ha..
she is really Her Majesty lah.. difficult to please.. kanna "failed" by her "tests".. told her jokingly that i am not out to please her.. but actually i really also taut so.. cannot jus have dinner wif fren meh?.. she asked me issit i was stressed.. actually i think she seemed more kam jiong than me leh..ha.. funny lah..i think she think too much..haiz.. i think wif her mentality.. no guy can be good fren wif her let alone chase her.. difficult lah.. she is too caught up wif the system liao.. in the end fetch her home to get her work card so that she can go to her office to do CMS.. went to her office at river valley.. ask me to accompany her up cos it was already very late and nobody's around.. told her she shldn't come back if she is alone..later another of her colleague came to fetch her.. she and her colleagues gg cineleisure to see movie..
while in WH office, AD called me to tell me new arrangements in N280.. MK, WW and MF will follow me..talked to MK and MF abt new arrangements but can't reach WW.. later even when i sms all of them, WW din respond.. dunno if he overseas or wat but i know WW may not be happy lah .. last time when i was still in W283.. he was on par wif me but after YJ left for china, SL and AD came and MK rose above him, he went further down the pecking order.. if i was him, i may feel the same..a helper without any motivation is as good as jus a member but ultimately if his motivation is jus for the title then i can say thats prob why he is not there yet..
haiz.. jus received msn msg from WH that she tell SL that we went dinner yest.. wah piangz.. she want the whole world to know issit??!! .. its jus a dinner leh.. isn't she gg overboard? haiz.. i dun think i will want to ask her again lah.. its jus crazy..
Reached expo at 830am to give BS then MK overslept again.. after svc i gave it to him lah moderate level.. but 3 wks missin bs is too much.. told him he has no respect for other ppl's time and this affects other areas of his life too.. which explains why he skips lessons time and again..it doesn;t matter if bs is in afternoon or morning.. if he dun overcome his lack of discipline, his studies and next time his work will be affected..
then after svc, talked on the phone with BK who left b4 svc ended.. throughout whole svc he super attitude lah but he NDW so jus pang chance and talk nicely wif him.. encourage him and dissected his problem.. i believe he knows wat i mean but the inertia not to change is jus too great..
Felt abit bad cos while i was talkin to him, ZF passed me his wedding invitation and i din have chance to talk to him. Also din have chance to talk to WR and HS who seemed like they wanted to talk to me. Then met WH. Told BK i called him back later. Long time din really talk to her. Told me she jus came back from China wif her family. Actually quite gum wif her but like i say if i cgl aldy or if she less fierce, prob will consider lah..
Attended HCGL bs wif pst derek.. it was a long bs cos it was last lesson for SOT students and pst prayed for some of them..then rushed down to Marina wif AD, ML and WK to meet up wif Charmaine and rest of the leaders to plan for Zone Xmas and Thanksgiving events.. Charmaine asked SL to split N280 up to 2 subgroups but still 1 cg like previously discussed.. one i take and the other AD take.. so now officially take 14-15 ppl liao...
meetin ended at 7pm.. gotta be treasurer for zone thanksgiving.. think its the easiest job compared to AM's powerpoint slides and SL's video testimonies.. then forgot where i parked my car and AM n AD had to wait for me..AD was already late for Jeff and Hazel's weddin at fort canning.. i was also runnin late for LC's wedding at Meritus Mandarin ..
Orchard Road was super crowded yest evening loh..dunno why.. Meritus Mandarin had no more parkin lots.. in the end had to park at my usual parkin place behind Heeren.. heard that yest was an auspicious day to get married.. anw as usual the TCHS 4A gang was the rowdiest ppl at the whole dinner lah..some of the ppl i hadn't seen for a long time such YY and TK were there..
As usual JA came up with the drink..i came up with the name.. "December Delight"..sounds good right..ha.. throughout the whole dinner we were cracking jokes and laughing non stop.. HZ commented that everytime we come 4A weddin dinner was like attending some comedy show..the guys like never grow up but it this bonding that makes it all fun..
went home super tired..din reply H's sms for dinner or WH's sms ..kanna shot by both of them on msn today.. but told WH that her sms like no need reply mah.. JC smsed say she was surprised that I rem her bdae..she gey gey or wat..of cos i rem lah.. hope she had a great day yest..
yest nite attended talk on interview skills at smu.. the lady was good lah.. can't rem her name.. though some of the guys say she abit luo suo but she really got alot of experience and knowledge..
then most of the classmates went over to this place at raffles city call INK for our post exam party organized by MNK. When we reached there, the guys who had skipped the talk had already almost finished the food.. left only sushi and alot of booze for rest of us.. filled myself wif watever left of the sushi and many of my classmates drank like there was no tomorrow ..i din really drank much.. just courtesy when i lost a game or when someone cheers..some of them were really sloshed.. saw different sides of ppl like SM and SH.. SM usually looks the quiet, demure kind but after a couple of drinks she was havoc and dancing away wif many of the other male classmates .. its prob the last time we get to see SH as he had secured a managemnent associate position at citibank and will be deferring this course.. still quite amazed how he did it.. anw din know he is a lady killer lah.. within 1/2 hr.. he was slow dancing wif this lady which he jus got to know then SN came up wif some plot to snatch this gal away and ASW also became interested.. anw it got really complicated but everything was cool lah..
the live band was loud lah..gotta keep raising my voice to talk to the others.. actually i really got to know many of them which usually do not have the chance to.. managed to talk to DB, CH, KH, KV, AU.. in fact many of the quiet ones.. even found from KH valuable info abt the CMFAS, info on workin at UOB from CH and got to break the ice wif KV and AU.. joked with KV abt her "complicated" relationship wif MY and that she shld go set up an Indian Frenster website called "lonelysingles.com"
only C and I turned up for the party while the rest of the hwachong gang were conspicuously missing.. haiz.. we kanna labelled as anti social by the rest of the class liao lah.. the guys always call me the only social butterfly of the antisocial hwachong ppl.. M, SL, AS, LL all usually dun mix ard wif the rest.. then as usual the guys question me where is M.. actually i and C also dunno bu tthink she is in KL.
at 230am the guys decided to adjourn either to have supper or to this place i think call temple ( not sure if spell correctly)..S had left early and gone temple first and sms the rest to come over.. ZL was tryin to persuade the rest to go..i din stay to find out the conclusion.. offered to send CJ and SM home cos both gals were quite drunk liao but they can't decide if they wanna go home so CJ told me to go ahead first..
yest told AB to help me buy a present for JC and give it to her in AB 's name .. dun mention me.. tmr her bdae .. think yest nite her frens prob celebrated for her cos her weekends like me usually jus packed.. mayb her dance frens will jio her go zoukout later and celebrate wif her there.. anw jus hope she is happy lah..
saw YL blog.. realise its JH and WY bdae yest..think the ecaco ppl gone some place yest to celebrate lah.. think will jus sms to wish them later..not sure they will turn up for LC's wedding dinner tmr.. commented on KY's blog that long time din see them wif the rest of 4A liao..haiz..
ok mayb not.. anyway got my 2nd term results today and it was above my expectation.. 1B, 3B+.. pulled up my GPA to 3.23. after my bad start in 1st term .. at least now i get heaved a sigh of relief.. Gotta work even harder next sem.. my ultimate aim is to get above 4.0.. then can put in my resume! ha..
however my happiness was slightly dampened after comparing wif some of the rest.. cos they got better results.. realise in life its really depressing to compare.. 人比人气死人.. u shld try to outdo yurself not others..
yest ask FJC to help me forward my resume to his boss.. have really been thinkin of transferring to his IT dept as things my side have been getting stale.. tried to convince WH to go wif me.. but if i think i am passive i think WH is worse.. sometimes i am fed up wif him lah.. he can complain alot abt his job, say alot abt leaving and transferring,yet at the end of the day it is jus empty talk and no action.. then wats the point of saying? if there is 1 kind of person that i 看不起 in life.. it is the all talk no action kind of ppl.. talk is cheap lah..jus like how some guys sweet talk gals.. i mus admit WH is a smarter scholar than me.. but at the end of the day.. no matter how smart u r .. if u dun have the drive to take action, u will jus remain mediocre..
supposed to meet FJC now for lunch as he wanna let me know more abt his dept before i jump ship but he last min cannot make it..
attended this talk on networking yest evening.. actually like the one on resume writing 2 days ago.. its all part of a series of talks for masters students like us.. tonight's one will be on interview..actually the talks are all very useful and the consultants that smu invite are all really good..the guy yest paul heng taught us this thing on "elevator speech" and how to network and mutually benefit u and yur contacts..on sideline also taught us things like negotiating salary, the price value of the job ( that u shld never lower yur standards) and how we must maintain our employability by actively upgrading our skills n maintaining contacts.. at times it was almost becomin abit motivational talk esp at last part when he asked us to pierce our potato wif straw..din noe it is actually quite easy.. go try it..
somethin in his networking talk struck me.. he said that ppl who have arrived in life and behave like they have, are not worthy for you to know them.. like my previous entry of how humble and nice Nanz Chong was.. i think if u really have a snobbish air ard u becos u think u r one up on others then u r not being smart cos u never know that this person u snub today can be somebody successful tmr.. u never shld burn yur bridges..i decide that i will make it a point to thank and be nice to the cleaners in my office, the hawkers who clear my table, the sales person who sell me things. And i started wif the car wash workers who clean my car at Caltex today..God exalts the humble and resists the proud
after the talk.. sped down to yio chu kang ww's condo to prac guitar for zone event..aiya taut we performing this sat then urgent only to realise from ww its next week.. if i know then wun have gone aldy lah.. so tired.. in the end prac until 12am then go home.. can't imagine my hectic lifestyle w/o my precious wife civic.. nowadays i hardly get to see my dad.. he will be asleep when i reach home and gone to work when i wake up.. my mum will usually jus wait up for me with her half closed eyes when i return at 11 plus 12.. my house really becomin hotel lah..
prac 4 songs wif ww on keyboard and sk on electric guitar and i on acoustic..abit proud of myself lah cos i master them in less than an hour despite not knowin them at all .. years of trainin as cg guitatrist pays off sia..haha.. but sk is really good wif his electric lah and he only 19.. think he will go far..
today received frenster message from CJP! he was my sec1-2 classmate..wah really lost contact wif him for many yrs liao.. all thanks to frenster now in contact again. rem last time he always suan me in sec 1 that i eat very slow and messy..ha.. he say he could not recognize me as i like change alot.. actually alot of ppl also say i change alot leh even not so long ago frens like my army mates.. 会吗?
recently realise alot of ppl sick esp my zone ldrs.. my zs charmaine was sick, AM was sick, SL was sick, AD was sick.. then now i abit sick.. dunno why yest woke up wif a sorethroat.. but today better liao.. this final mth of dec very impt for our zone yet so many of the leaders fallin sick.. how?
yest BK very attitude when i called him.. he NDW lah.. heard its the bad company he mixing with at his workplace.. gotta get him back yet difficult to meet up or talk wif him..how?
after bs yest, went to this $10ktv in chinatown with MK to meet up XN and some of the rest cos XN flyin back china today and comin back only in Feb.they had this korean fren who is here in singapore for internship.. wah his voice super power loh! think if he more shuai he can be superstar liao lah.. ha
din stay long for ktv.. cos din intend to sing but jus show face see XN.. also cos my car park double yellow.. dun wanna kanna fine again..seems TP these few days very on.. went home abit eng so read this book by Nanz Chong that my mum borrowed.. its called One Business 99 lessons..its a solid book for those who wanna start their own business cos she really offer alot of practical advice.. of cos some of the things she write are those that we heard before in church preached by pastor such as "Money is amoral and takes on the character of its owner"
on a side note. jus like to comment that Nanz is really a nice person.. rem the first time i saw her in church was durin our opening service back in jurong west in dec 2001.. she was in the row in front of me..helping her cg book seats .. can u imagine she was then entrepreneur of the year and she was doing humble tasks like booking seats! And she really had no airs about her.. she was jus basically talkin to people around her even when she dunno them.Super friendly lah! Even though her business failed due to unforeseen circumstances such as SARS in 2003, i can see thru her the principle that God exalts the humble that she started from nowhere to bring 199 shop to great heights.You can't keep a good man/woman down. I really believe she and her husband larry will come back again. Nanz jia you!
anyway there was something in her book caught my attention yest.. it was on making a decision. Actually pastor said this before too.. when u dun make a decision, u have already made one. When ppl put off making a choice or a decision, things become unclear, ppl start to draw their own conclusions . Thats why she mention that a wrong decision is better than a no decision cos wif a wrong decision at least things can move on and if it turns out wrong, things can be done to rectify them but without a decision, there is no direction, things just stay stagnant and procrastinate and everybody becomes confused.
something related..that day a statement on someone's frenster caught my attention too.."Many unhappy things in life stems from things left unsaid".. i think be it at work, in relationships wif frens,family and spouse, when things are left hanging and unresolved, when nobody makes a decision in any direction, there is breakdown in communication and everybody is frustrated.. mayb some time later we can look back in regret at how things may have been better if choices, feelings and decisions have been communicated effectively..
Like wat we always hear from Pastor, "Communication is really the key to life"
JC bdae comin.. actuali wanted to send her somethin but in the end i taut suan le.. jus sms lah
yest attended this talk on Resume writing.. din realise alot goes into writing resumes and cover letters.. and a small difference can decide if its a good resume or a bad one..the guy stephen was funny lah and the whole talk was helpful..glad i attended it.. realise i need to do more both in my job or outside activities if i want to have content in my resume
Gave S a lift to boat quay to meet her ex ACJC classmates at Eski..so difficult to find parking even on a tues nite that in the end we just gave up and park along jagged yellow.. and kept a lookout for TP.. other than the IBM guy who doesn't know TH.. the other 2 gals like professional chiongsters loh.. although they quite pretty lah..found one of the gal familiar then later realise from S where i saw her before.. she is financial planner from GE and JA who is my planner from GE regularly send this newsletter and i saw her in the newsletter b4 lah..
on the way home, S and i talk quite abit.. actually since her incident wif MY, i have a prompting that she had some problems wif her bf.. i jus asked her and she was shocked that i can discern since she din tell anyone.. not even those supposed close frens that we met earlier.. haiz.. somehow i have a knack for these things.. ha.. told her perharps God was using me to help her find an answer to her problem..
she din share wif me in the end lah.. and i jus told her generically that i dunno wat she is facing but i feel that if things are not improving then perharps it is better to let go now then to linger and be more hurt.. she say she will share wif me another time but thank me for the advice which really spoke to her
actually all these prompted me to think.. who are yur 'close frens'? sometimes we mistake ppl who do things wif us as our close frens.. mayb our drinkin buddies, mayb our chionging group, mayb our mahjong kakis.. but thru these events, do yur frens really get to know u? S's frens din even know or din bother to find out she was gg thru an emotional crisis and it takes a not-so-close fren like me to help her after i felt troubled seeing her behavior wif MY 2 weeks back( see previous entry)..
And i think this is a sad situation busy young ppl like us are facing today.. we have no outlet for watever problems we facing.. and we choose to ignore or escape thru chionging, drinking, mahjong.. i have nothing against all these activities but if they are just a front to mask a deeper hurt and need then hiding it with a facade is not gg to help in any way..
Mayb sometimes all we want, in the midst of all the noise and activities, is just someone to provide a listening ear..
Yest went to see 墨攻 with H at vivo.. din expect on monday night 9pm plus and since the show has been ard for some time.. so many ppl will be watchin it! in the end only first row left for us.. told H i definitely wanted to see lah even if sit 1st row .. think she felt abit forced lah..ha..
But in the end it turned out good lah! the battle scenes are solid..刘德华 as usual stylo.. but towards the end it was abit draggy and could have done without alot of the 墨家 anti-war peace talk which was becoming abit irritating and overkill towards the end..吴奇隆 was the super cool archer macham Orlando Bloom in LOTR..everytime u think 梁城 was gg to fall..革离(刘德华's character) comes up with some super strategy to trick and destroy the enemy 赵军
but the ending is sad lah..go see for yurself..ha.. other than the message that war profits nobody in the end.. i think another impt message is "岂能尽如人意，但求无愧我心"..sometimes in life u may have the best intentions like 刘德华 but yet these intentions can be misinterpreted either intentionally or unintentionally..at the end of the day u can never please everybody:岂能尽如人意 but u just do yur best and know u have not compromise on yur values: 但求无愧我心
i think another thing the movie talks about is human pride.. the 梁king had alot of pride that he became jealous of 革离, the 梁general and 赵general both have alot of pride that they rather foolishly wait for death..Pride is mistaken confidence and its dangerous both to yourself and ppl around you..
the movie also had alot of ironies.. the traitors later became 革离's most loyal supporters, some of the ppl who dislike him initially saved him in the end, the 赵general came to realise that his real enemy is not 革离 or 梁城 but its war itself.. but both me and H felt that the movie could have had a happier ending with 逸悦(范冰冰's character)..
H spotted Pst Ming while we having dinner before the show.. think he din see us.. he was queuing up for this popular beef noodle and the queue took so long that pst only got it when we had finished eating..
then saw a church brother G outside toilet after the show..he went to see same show as us.. ha..he was wif my real neighbour E and another guy.. G saw H wif me.. dunno if he will be mistaken anot..
Just now over lunch heard that an engineer from my company who is in the IT dept committed suicide last week.. quite shocking and sad news.. heard that it was bcos he lost alot of money in stocks..
haiz.. i can still rem ard last year this time i lost alot of money in stocks.. it was really depressing wif all the blood thirsty brokers keep chasing u .. it was a painful and expensive lesson.. won't say how much i lost but it was quite alot.. yest during dinner while talkin with YY, i revealed to them that my mum helped me pay off the debts at that time without blinking an eye.. she knew i was already very upset over the losses.. bcos of that incident i knew my mum really loved me depite some times when we argue over certain things..
when i think abt the whole incident then, i felt i had really become quite obsessed that time.. i wanted to make up for my initial losses by taking up even greater risks on contra.. which of cos all backfired as wif contra i dun have time on my side.. its playin wif chance.. if the market moves the other way.. u r a goner..i rem the rising oil price and bird flu then really destroyed me.. i told myself and told God i will not wanna go back to that state ever again..
actually yest when i talk to YY, i felt he was abit like me 2 yrs ago.. eager to make quick buck in the stocks.. tried to advise him abit from my experience.. i have realise the impt principle over the years.. slow and steady win the race My lecturer once told us that Warren Buffett locked himself for 5 years to study financial reports before he constructed the winning stock profile he has today .. there are really no short cuts in life.. all the hotshots, arrogant traders will end up like nick leeson and the recent Mitsui trader..
anw i also rem that i went into such an obsession then to 麻醉 myself from the incident wif JC incident..i hope she will never get to read this blog and realise this episode in my life due to her.. but i guess its the same wif everybody.. everybody needs something to take their minds off from an event or incident that they dun wanna recall.. and for me at that time it was making money thru stocks..at 1st i was good, then i bcame greedy and it was downhill all the way..
Yest heard abt my cousin beating up my 姑妈 until my 大伯, my eldest cousin and my dad had to step in to intervene and threaten to call police if this continues.. heard that he has become quite an alcoholic too.. why? i rem this year chinese new year he was so full of hope and aspiration cos his food business was about to take off but yet few months later it folded and that was the start of a downslide..
Sometimes the larger the expectations, the greater the disappointmentbut does it mean that we stop dreaming and just become slackers.. thats why i always believe this verse in the bible " without a vision the people perish"
Without any hope or vision for yur life, u will cast off all restraints and do whatever u like , without any consideration to others or yourself.. u will not consider the consequences of your actions.. u will not think of things from long term perspective..u are just living for the now..
Just like when i became obsessed wif trading shares.. without considering if i can pay for the losses.. to me it was something to distract me from things i dun wanna rem.. it was a form of escape..jus like some ppl use alcohol, gambling, pornography and worst suicide to escape
But u can never escape cos escaping doesn't provide the solution, u gotta bite the bullet and keep walking
wah serious inspiration talk sia.. ok relac abit..here's a power mtv from 小猪.. his dancing is quite solid.. take note of the dancer on the left.. its this moustached cool guy who is his 师父
6 hrs of gruelling mind exercise yesterday at expo hall 1.. alot of ppl din turn up.. quite alot of empty seats.. though there were still ard 2000 ppl ba..
other than my own course mates.. saw frens that i din see for long time.. saw Chen Zhen b4 the start.. wah dunno how many ages din see him liao.. then saw Minghe after lunch.. also saw colleagues Damien and Jialing
the 240 questions really force u to think fast and be very clear on yur concept.. time is really a limited commodity.. if u spend more time on 1 question.. u r gg to miss out on the other questions and their angmoh is really tricky..really hope can pass this time
after the exams.. could see faces of relief from my classmates.. think they aldy thinkin abt this fri's party by Manik.. dunno wanna go anot lah.. dun go like buay swee.. dunno if Benedict and the other prof will turn up anot.. 搞不好 our prof all very happening one..
expo this weekend was crazy lah.. so many exhibitions.. plus the usual crowd from our church and FCBC..think the whole singapore there.. on sat when i went there for service..i gotta park so far away cos everywhere were cars park.. even double park..took 20-30 mins jus to drive into expo drive cos there were just too many cars..
then sunday reported at 8am for exams.. at that time it was very peaceful but when the exams finish at 5pm..it was madness like on sat..went the IT fair and the big boyz toyz exhibitions. alot of ppl at IT fair and since it was last day, everyone was rushin to get the best deals and prices were being slashed.. the big boyz toyz was abit more peaceful.. got cars,motorbikes, guys magazines, few skimpily dressed models.. actuali nothin one lah.. not lup-sup as some ppl say leh..
my hp was spoilt from the rain that soaked my bag while it was placed outside the hall during exams.. needed to meet AB and gang for dinner but could not send out sms.. then 天意 lah.. Met her in the midst of the hugh crowd while jus walkin towards john little.. ha
AB pulled me along to the John little sale..it was even more 夸张 than the other 2.. the queue to pay is from one end of the hall to the other.. JL wanted to help TF buy a fryin pan for his mum.. but AB say the queue too long aldy..so in the end YY, AB, JL and me jus left for Bugis lah.. AB is like 大姐 among them.. so watever she say influence the rest..
went dinner at this Phinz restaurant at Bugis.. western food.. it was not as cheap as wat AB say but still cheap lah.. talked to YY and realise he is quite investment-savvy and stocks-crazy like me too.. ha..
super tired by the end of the day.. dunno how many ppl have commented over the weekend that i looked tired and half dead.. although i really was tired but yet i still think i am in stress mode cos i could not sleep last night.. or mayb its the coffee bean iced mocha i had during lunch.. mayb it was super caffinated
Jus heard this old song over 883 庸人自扰 by 小虎队.. way back in 1996 i still rem i used lyrics of this song to encourage one of my jc classmates YN .. last time always took 174 wif her then along the way we always talk alot of nonsense.. can't rem exactly wat she was troubled over at that time but i rem she appreciated my encouragements..=)
guess its the feelin that u fail before and dun want to fail again that matters..
once bitten twice stressed
i guess some stress is positive.. went back workplace to get extra calculator and schwarzer book 6 from WH then come smu get softcopy of book6 from CH as WH's hardcopy got pencil marks and in case i have no time to erase or jus plain lazy..
met WW while on the way to find CH and she tell me she come smu lib to borrow book on alternative investments as she spotted 3-4 Qns on them.. Wah Piangz.. i cannot even finish studyin and here she borrowing extra material to read up.. power sia..
then she tell me she gg bugis shopping.. double Wah Piangz.. when i told CH and MN abt it, they also legs go weak.. either she is super power or overconfident lah.. told them ppl accountant leh.. close both eyes also know how to do FSA
saw CH like quite stressed also..wonder how many packs he smoking per day this week.. guess the uncle selling him cigarettes dua tan lah..
Actually long ago since A levels days, i realise yur greatest enemy is really yurself.. if i stay at home by myself to study, my body has the tendency to seek out a lying place and hibernate there.. in school i will gravitate towards the nearest computer terminal..guess everyone has a certain threshold capacity to study, work, play and once that maximum is hit, anythin beyond is negative marginal utility.. and i guess how successful u r in life depends on how large yur capacity is....
if u can be like 陈虾 in 出路( hey its the only drama i can watch when i reach home so late at night).. one day carry 100 sacks of rice, 10 cartloads of rubber sheets, then today mayb ur statue is in some school staring disapprovingly at some lazy student as he is wasting his time blogging.. .. otherwise u r just one of the many in Mandai or Lim Chu Kang who have enriched the soil..
Today as i was studyin.. suddenly i rem a bo liao question one of my fren asked another female fren b4.. if there are 3 men she can choose, 1 is 帅，1 is rich and the last is capable, which one will she choose? taking note that the 帅 one is not rich or capable, and it goes the same for the other 2.. they only have one quality each..if u r a gal readin this, which will u choose?
i can't rem my fren's answer but i know most gals will choose option 帅 and option rich, forgettin abt option capable.. bcos gals are gals mah..haha
but i really think the best answer is to choose a capable guy mah..帅 like 美 will fade away when old so its no point gettin a yandao who cannot do anythin and let u live a poor, miserable life.. of cos the romantics out there will disagree lah..
rich no point if the guy is not capable and will just waste away watever fortune that his parents have left him..and in the end u will be left with a spineless slacker who cannot take hardships of life
so the best is capable cos if the guy is capable, together u r a team that can conquer any problem together.. u know that u can count on him to get things done..even he is not rich right now, he will become rich one day.. even if he is hideous looking, he can go to Woffles for plastic surgery wat..
so sayin so much.. of cos if give me choose between 美，rich and capable.. i will choose..美 lah! ha.. kiddin..
today studied in ntu lib again then met Q.. yest met G .. today Q.. also long time din talk to Q liao.. let alone see him in church.. he looks quite stressed with the "this time sure die" look on his face..his last paper is tmr.. anw he always been like that since i knew him in yr 1.. super stressed over exams..
then saw SL.. yest saw her wif her bf T and another guy so din wanna go and disturb them..instead watch from the top where i was studyin..voyeuristic sia..haha T like a bit buay song while the other guy like very physically close to SL leh.. ha.. SL today told me that the guy is helping her in her FYP.. haiz..expected lah.. if SL was a guy or not so pretty .. think that guy wun even bother!..
watchin that scene.. i can't help but think how T will think.. he prob thinkin:"Here I am with SL but yet i can't help her wif her project and this smart alec guy tryin to be funny wif her.. haiz.."
call me MCP lah and really no offence to T (he is a nice yandao lah) but i think guys shldn't have their gf much smarter than them that they feel so helpless when she needs to seek help from another guy in her work, project, finances or watever.. call me egotistic lah.. saying this i not implyin that gals shld be dumb blondes either.. the best would be both are on equal standing..
just now went to find SL while takin break.. saw that other "helpful" guy wif her again..still abit too close for comfort.. anw why i so kapo.. SL not my gf mah.. haiz.. but she used to be my cg mah..last time we go thru thick and thin under AM.. so i purposely made my presence felt..ha.. must help T mah.. brothers united..felt i did a good deed today..ha
poor CT cannot take leave to study her CFA..thats why i am studyin alone in ntu.. nobody to entertain me... msg me say she think she gonna fail.. actually honestly i take leave study aldy quite xiong then more so for her.. even smart ppl like M gotta take leave go KL study wif that smart alec high flyer .. how much more ordinary mortals like us? ha.. but i just encourage her to try her best lah.. mayb 搞不好 CT also 卧虎藏龙.. not ordinary mortal also.. 随随便便 also can pass one..
after my CFA, i wanna watch the andy lau movie 默攻 leh.. looks nice .. also cos i like lau tuck hwa too lah.. watch his movies since young.. last time like to 模仿 his chao paikia say.. thats why now ppl sometimes say my actions stil abit paikia.. actually i really not purposely one.. have been tryin to get rid of the paikia swagger and slang but not very successful.. mayb its jus me lah..
studyin in ntu lib right now brings back memories of my undergrad days here..想当年..
yest someone was askin me why i always go school study.. basically i cannot be left alone.. cos i won't study! i will waste my time away.. sleeping, watchin tv, reading newspaper..only when i see others studyin and having that stressed look on their faces then i will make my self study..its abit warped mentality lah... i realise this when i was in JC and have been studyin in sch and outside since the time when i prepare for my A levels..
getting abit bored studyin alone here in ntu.. no M, no CT, no AF or AL.. jus now SL called me say she saw me in canteen A after i finished lunch..she finished exams liao but came sch to do FYP presentation slides.. later go and find her..
i realised that u will be motivated to do things u r good at.. and right now i am lousy at my FSA.. thats why i have no motivation and come to surf net and blog.. ha..
As i was typin this, saw G here..actually din recognize him cos his hair now long liao.. long time din talk to him since strikeforce days .. then we jus coffee shop talk until this china guy beside my computer terminal say "excuse me if u wanna talk pls go to the canteen"
wah Piangz.... i like to say i got nothin against china ppl.. in fact last time i was quite close to ppl like MH, ZM and back in yr 1 CX.. but this guy was really too much lah.. he was not even studyin and looking some chinese powerpoint slide on the meaning of love.. and i dun tink we were talkin loudly..
lib cannot talk meh? then shld start tellin all students and staff in the lib to use sign language liao lah..
Here I am in SMU on a Sunday evening, trying to conquer the entire Financial Statement Analysis by today.. jus met AF,AL and AC..all of them progress seem faster than me.. really must BIA
Yest East Coast event for zone turned out quite good.. although 4 of us din really plan much and FJ was like super cool abt the whole planning but yet by God's grace everything worked out fine even despite the rain..the guys got super dirty with the flour, water melon, sea water, water bombs.. taut a Ah Cek like me will never get the chance to see all these games aldy but i guess i will see more of this as i continue to serve in CL zone..actually 4 of us were clean and prepared to stay clean by arming ourselves wif water bombs.. then i was 1st one to be attacked.. BK "sacrificed" himself to be bombed by me so that the few other bros can surround me.. din really struggle lah ..just handed my hp to them while they threw me into water..throw throw lah sea water only mah... then WK , FJ and ML got attacked subsequently.. FJ was abit mad with SK for smashing his head wif water melon.. told SK to apologise..
jus now MK looked quite downcast before service.. after service i and SL talked to him, he cried while SL counselled him, later after SL, i went to encourage him after hearing abt his family problem.. MK also abit like me in the sense that sometimes he can be quite closed up... but in the end he still went for makeup cg and i think pastor phil's message today on prayer really helped him alot..
just now as we were studyin.. AF and AL teased me abt M again.. gotta explain to them for the umpteenth time that M is like my sister to me.. seems the senior batch of MAF also know M.. and got ppl eye her too.. Like wat my childhood good fren SX told me.. the reason why i am close to gals like M, CT, AB and last time back in NTU, CL who were all pretty by popular standards, was bcos they know i dun have any intentions.. AL was joking in that sense i was abit like the gays and gu niangs that gals like to hang out wif..wah piangz!..haiz.. actually guy and gal cannot just be good fren meh? why always ppl see then will think something gg on between them esp if the gal is quite pretty?
ok lah.. gotta go back to study..no gal studyin wif me today so the guys no entertainment news to gossip on.. ha.. super hungry.. its nearly 6 in the evenin and i not eaten lunch..must as well fast for my exams sia.. ha
Yest mum told me abt the investment she made wif OCBC.. i got nothin against them but after hearing her.. felt the deal was not worth it.. all the insurance coverage and lump sum payment are just to entice u..
told her so many times liao.. cannot trust the structured products.. they package it nicely cos they just wanna cream u.. in the end the returns are just around 3%.. why they din consult me b4 sinking in the money?
but wat to do? they aldy put in the money.. their son get Masters in finance for fun ah? got into an argument wif mum late last nite..ok lah my temper abit not good but sometimes i can't help but think mum trusts the bank officers more than me.. if she had trust me on the SGS bonds.. easily could have earned more than 3-3.5%.. if willing to take abit more risk.. 5-7% also got..and they are as riskless as yur SD.. c'mon 3% may not be even enuff to cover inflation!..
yest AB msg me ask me to help her wif some bank loan for her studies.. last time i become her gurantor.. now bank loan.. next time wat? not that i selfish.. i think there's a limit to wat a fren can do.. i'm not her bf but yet i'm also her tuition teacher, her part time chauffeur....why like that? Where's her Mr J when she need him? Have she help me settle my issue wif JC? think AB doesn't even bother abt it.. When she dun need u .. she doesn't even bother to reply yur sms.. AB is not a gd fren to have but yet i'll still help her.. not bcos i like her but bcos i 心太软 to all my frens..
today's another bad day waitin for parking lot.. Waitin
Still Waitin!!
in the end still no lot after all the narcisstic photo taking to pass time..gotta climb up the hill again later..haiz..next week on leave to study CFA..dun need to face this problem..
Yest went for Charmaine's BS at suntec church office on "Finding the Right Partner".. din noe this was part of our bs curriculum.. 1st lesson was on the 8 types of relationships that won't work.. it was practically very accurate.. think pastor and sun really has alot of wisdom from all their yrs of counselling couples.. of cos charmaine had to warn the youths in the class that it doesn't give them the license to just go out and find any tom, dick or sally after they have attended this whole course just like wat pastor said for the marriage seminar..
think 2 things that struck me was firstly God doesn't choose your mate. Even Charmaine said she took a number of years before her mindset on this was changed. This actually means there is no such thing as 命中注定.. and there're actually a number of bible verses which say so.. God may have someone in mind for u but just like everything else in life, u have a free will to choose.. many ppl's wrong idea of 缘份 made them choose their life partners based on the intense first impression they have of the person - 一见钟情 , ignoring other more practical issues like compatibility. This lead to breakups and divorces when real mundane life takes over romance.
secondly, there are many deceptions to true love.somethin that Charmaine say struck me.. after she had counselled many couples on verge of breakup or divorce, she realise that many of them had known of certain problem(s) of the other half but yet had expected the person to change..it is a fairy tale mindset..e.g the person may be a flirt or gambler or alcoholic or bad-tempered or foul-mouthed or chain-smoker or irresponsible person or mayb other smaller problems.. sure he/she may change for u for now but when the love is no longer as strong and he goes back to his old ways, will u still love him/her? Many ppl go into a relationship/marriage wif a "project" or "rescue mission" mindset. This is not true love and u r on course to a doomed relationship. the important question we shld always ask ourselves is this: " Do you love this person for who he/she is right now, that is even if he/she doesn't become wat u expect"
true love means sacrifice and commitment to your spouse irregardless if the person is no longer as handsome/pretty as he/she used to be.. even if he/she doesn't become the doctor/lawyer/actress/singer u thought he/she will become.. even if he/she becomes stressed out in work and doesn't behave as nicely as used to be.. like wat pastor say in marriage series.. it is a definite that your love for each other will wane thru circumstances in life but because both of u make the commitment to work it out rather than escape.. things will come thru and your love for each other will become stronger thru the years..
Wow.. thats good preaching eh! Clap, Clap..
Recently learned that my parents cgl BC's wife suffered a miscarriage and lost her twin boys.. she was extremely sad and i really feel for the family.. but i know BC really love his wife and he will be there to support and love her even more..i believe they will cherish each other even more thru this incident..
"All things work for the good of those who love God" - Rom 8:28
Totally agree wif YL.. the weather nowadays abit weird.. i think this morning it has rain, shine, rain, shine dunno how many times liao.. how i know abt the weather since i inside air con office? cos i have been climbing Telok Blangah Hill 4 times liao!!..haiz.. long story.. to cut story short I am waiting for parking space...the things ppl do to save money..
Abit bored while waiting..
think a few ppl sick from the weather.. like YL,TH and my own brother who is coughing quite badly at home.. yest went to clinic to see doc for my blue-black big toe..another long story.. anw when u r getting old.. u get injured more easily..haiz..Thank God he din poke it.. he say it will just subside away lah...anw at the clinic a lady beside me looks like she got a bad cold..
Yest heard this old song by 阿杜 on 883 then today heard it again on 972.. dun really like 阿杜 but like this song of his..can't find the mtv on Youtube
think i'm abit addicted to Youtube.. ..like this song ..
金莎- 笨蛋
and this duet...
卓文萱 曹格 - 梁山伯与茱丽叶
was just surfing thru frenster then found this ntu gal that looks like 卓文萱.. no kiddin..
Just when the whole world is finishing exams.. i still have my CFA exams to worry abt on 3dec.. just read that in Jan they gg to open the shortcut bypass road thru SMU that bypasses stamford road..haiz.. that means no more free illegal parking along double yellow for SMU cheapskates like us.. Sianz..
Like this song 朋友出去走走 翻唱 by 2moro.. its actually an old song by 吴百伦.. wah if din google i aldy forgotten this singer..now he prob some ah pek wif 2 kids..
2moro 朋友出去走走
Yest prayer meet was good.. felt strengthened in faith..rem N280 winning the "Final Sprint " award at last yr thanksgiving.. was debriefing some of them and told them last yr W283 won "Jerusalem CG" award and this yr i believe that since i am here wif them now, we can win it this year! ha... was so excited abt it that i mass sms the whole cg.. hope they are really encouraged.. CL zone really alot of events comin up.. was just smsing WH yest that this week alone fri,sat, sun zone all got events.. think we becomin like ET zone to become "commando zone"..ha..asked WH if she got any plans for Christmas.. ha..hope she dun think too much ah..
dunno wat happened to AD.. think she not well ..nvr really say.. so all the cg stuff i gotta do.. so much stuff to do for this sat east coast.. other than FJ.. its all the helpers like ML, WK and me doing leh..
Last night happen to go home early and watch this HK drama call 冲上云霄..then my mum was trying to explain to me wat was gg on between the characters acted by Francis Ng and Flora Chan.. call this TV bonding between mother and son.. .. actually dun really know wat my mum was saying..ha.. but all i know is that there is some big misunderstanding between the 2 of them.. which made flora marry the character acted by 马德冲 when she actually love Francis and vice versa..
aiya drama always like that one lah.. but wat if one day u realise all these years u have misunderstood someone u love or a fren that u treasure greatly.. ..the scene in the drama that got me thinking was a couple quarelling abt why they din turn up at the arranged place years ago, and the misunderstanding caused them to breakup and eventually ended up marrying someone else.. as they pass by each other's family.. there was a tinge of regret and sadness in the scene..
i guess somethings are not meant to be.. haiz.. being someone who doesn't express himself very well in words.. i guess mayb one day the things left unsaid and uncleared wif ppl like JC, AB, CL and PY will clear.. but even if it doesn't .. then like John Lennon's song..."Let it be"
Yest H smsed me very personal questions again like if there was a girl i like? and if i looking for life partner? Wah Piangz.. abit buay tahan leh.. i told her its too personal liao lah.. told her b4 many times but she still doesn;t realise that her questions sometimes too personal .. then she can reply me that i am a person who dun reveal much.. alamak.. even if a person very close to you also may not tell u these stuff right? haiz..
Learned this verse from a Tay Ping Hui article on learning chinese in the Sunday times.. chim right? But felt it was good.. basically it means sometimes we take for granted things will always remain as it is & when we realise its gone then its too late already..
Recently i just learned that one of my good frens in JC, AE had married. i was thinking why he informed M and did not tell any of our class ppl.. haiz.. guess over the yrs the friendship had really gone lah.. But i guess sometimes it really takes 2 hands to clap.. 爱情不能勉强，友情不能强迫
Was just reading my church magazine Harvest Times abt Taiwan artiste 刘耕宏..took foto wif him in July during Taiwan Emerge:
Ha.. still rem how olivia was very excited to take foto wif him after the basketball match between our church and taiwan combined churches team.. ..haiz we really kanna thrashed.. 刘耕宏 and a white shorts teenager were really good....both of them combined flawlessly to destroy Singapore.. but Bro Joseph, Pst Yock Kiang and the rest of the CHC team put up a good fight lah..and the Singapore team cheering was solid lah.. think we drowned out the taiwanese although we were outnumbered.. brought back memories to my council cheering days..haha.. heard that 刘耕宏's good fren 周杰伦 wanted to make a secret appearance but in the end he was caught up wif something..
i rem during Emerge and during the service at New Life, Pastor asked him and his fiance Vivi to come up to share abt their experiences in the entertainment world.. other than his humility.. i was really inspired how they are using their influence to impact other artistes and youths.. in the article, 刘耕宏 was sharing abt how he felt really aimless just singing, hosting and earning money until its really a divine appointment that he got to know this friendly couple at the airport and invited them for dinner at a place which coincidentally turned out to be just beside New Life!! the rest is history..Now he is not just an artiste but he is being a role model and impacting youths in New Life and all over taiwan.. thats wat i called a real 艺人
this reminds me of something..i rem that day when i was having lunch wif CT at SMU Killeney's when we were studyin in sch..i realised she was also Christian but she had something against 何耀珊.. which i just listen.. i have realised over the years a very impt principle 清者自清..sometimes its really 越描越黑.. i just told CT simply that did she know that Sun donated all her album royalties to Ren Ci Hospital... it was kept low key..only CHC ppl knew abt it because she received alot of flak from the christian community for donating to a Buddhist organization.. but like pastor said.. God still loves U irregardless whether u believe in Him anot..
Bible says " When u do a charitable deed, do not let your left hand know what your right hand is doing, that your charitable deed may be in secret"..many ppl think CHC is rich but do they know the amt of money and effort that goes to helping the elderly, the intellectually disabled, the delinquent youths, the prison inmates? do ppl know that we help mosques and buddhist organizations too? do ppl know we are still giving to the tsunami rebuilding efforts when the world has forgotten abt them? i really think CHCSA is an understatement of the things they do..ppl think pst got Skin and Ed Hardy.. they think why pst can like that? But is it wrong to do business and give back to the poor?
thats wat i and the other 22000 of us in chc admire abt Pastor and Sun.. they are never afraid of wat others outside will say.. in this life u can never please everyone.. but they know that if they are doing the right things..God will bless and prosper them.. it has been like this.. and it will continue to be like this...
Away from work for a week.. took some narcisstic fotos while bored at studying:
Hiao
Outside SMU Lib after one day of studying
Do I look exam stressed?
Last Day of exams.. Alan - HJC same batch but MAF senior batch..
This foto wif my lao ban AM last time.. just recently found it from SL's multiply:
Yest sunday as usual was a busy day.. think sundays are always busiest for me..
Reached expo at 845 to give M bs ( N280's M..not to be confused wif my classmate M)then he overslept! haiz.. but think he genuinely din meant it lah so i also 算了..then jus b4 svc FJ asked me to help him play guitar for makeup cg later.. actually i was thinkin why FJ needed me to play for him since he usually play himself and he's so much better than me.. think he wanted to concentrate on ministering to the ppl ba..somemore din have the chords..but it was a great makeup cg.. think it was one of the best i had attended.. FJ said i have improved..ha.. told him i long time din play for cg liao cos now WW playin for N280.. its really God's anointing !
Then went to help out in Zone's Sportacular.. the basketball game was over by the time i arrive.. so became referee for one of the captain ball game..and realise CP is ML's cousin which means he is my tuition kid SL's cousin also.. this world is really small lah...
Then went to meet AB and gang for dinner at Bugis..first time joined them.. treated me like new fren in cg..Had Bak Ku Teh at this supposed quite famous stall.. then they went to Arcade where AB, SJ wasted $6 just to get the piece of chocolate from the "Candy machine" ..they played this Racing Mario Game which was quite fun...then went to a dessert shop where YY treated all of us.. AB told me YY had earned some money from his shares..they really quite a funny bunch of ppl lah.. taut JC would have joined them but she din..
Was super tired by the end of the day.. think my car was tired too.. i counted a total of 14 different ppl sat by car yest.. my parents in the morning.. FJ and his cg ppl after makeup, N280 ppl whom i sent to city hall and AB's gang ppl whom i sent home..
Yest Pastor shared a very good message.. "Your faith has made you well".. many times ppl just expect things to happen just like that..they have a spoon fed mentality..they expect the government to take care of them.. they expect God to rain down money from heaven..they are basically passive.. and when things dun happen like they hope.. they blame the government..they blame their parents..they blame God..Nobody owes u a living..u create yur own destiny wif all that God has already provided you with....
Exams finally over.. for now .. until 2 weeks later when my CFA comes and i gotta start muggging again.. esp for my FSA... my accounting really cannot make it.. somehow accounting is not my cup of tea..
Today's bonds exams was another killer.. our prof AL crazy one lah.. sat so many questions on TIPS and modified durartion that he hardly talk abt in class..think my derivatives was much better though i got a few wrongs liao..some of the ppl in my class copy until so obvious..copy also must have skill mah.. must be discreet mah.. wait get caught then very malu leh..
After exams...Went to watch this movie call " A Good Year" .. Russell Crowe is main character as a hotshot trader who finally realise the his priorities in life after inheriting the chateau of his favourite uncle Henry.. It's abit slow moving lah but somehow i still enjoyed it..The classmates i went to watch wif.. C, AW, W, A and LV all inspired to learn french after the show..
after show all of us except AW went back school to attend this dinner..the faculty has organized a end-of-semester n farewell dinner with our prof and seniors.. the seniors have officially finish their course but will need to wait until next July for convo..seeing them so happy takin fotos wif each other..we were all thinkin a year ahead when its our turn..had a great time getting to know many of the ppl in our class and the seniors..
Then i left early to go Bugis village to buy this car sticker that i wanted to buy for a long time.. actually b4 i left.. i aldy saw somethings i felt not right.. some of the ppl in my class were aldy a little high after having a drop too many.. ppl like AF and MY and S.. i saw MY's hands all over S and A was sitting very close to her too.. S dun seem to mind..Being the conservative guy..and S being quite a close fren of mine..I abit can't take it anymore so i walked away..
Then C smsed me and told me things really got abit scandalous after I left.. it seems T, J and ST had to try to pull the 3 of them apart..but yet MY left wif S after awhile with hands still all over her.. its crazy lah ..after the whole episode many of them felt S abit too open and MY was too havoc already..
I really dunno wat is happening between them right now even as i am typing this now.. but i am quite disappointed with how S had behaved.. actually all along i suspected she had jus broken up wif her bf cos everytime i asked her she like tryin to avoid.. then that time she went out wif ZL alone to drink which i aldy felt not appropriate..now this incident.. and she hardly know MY..does she consider how others will see her?.. haiz.. but who am I to tell her? She is old enuff to make her own decisions..
I was jus talkin wif C and we were joking like the HJC ppl in our class are like the most "toot" and 乖 bunch ..ha..i realise the sayin that " Still Waters Run Deep" is very true.. alot of seemingly quiet ppl in our class today were totally havoc and out of control under the influence of alcohol today.. Its alright to have a drop but u shld always know yur limits
I also feel gals shld 自爱.. Call me old fashion but i will never want my gf, wife or my daughter in future to behave the way S did today in front of so many ppl.. and if my son in future( if i have one) next time takes advantage of drunken ladies like how MY did today.. i will just give him a tight slap...
I still cannot understand why my fren S can 堕落 until like that..
Today tio another $70 summon.. park double yellow.. all these days i have been sitting at the lib window seats wif CT or M looking out for TP then out of nowhere this TP came and the first car he summoned out of the 1001 cars along the stretch is mine!!!! i was there a minute after he gave the summon..went up to argue wif him.. but he said cannot cancel..ask me appeal via email.. haiz.. some of the other cars escape cos they were summoned later.. its really not fair! some of the SMU students saw me arguing wif him.. anw sent in the appeal email liao.. they better accept my explanation else i am gg to the forum!! ha..
another thing too much lah..
too many mcq liao lah.. i think i have never practise so many mcq in one day for a long time since my A level Econs.. and i am still practising.. CT left aldy to go home watch "House of Wax".. wah piangz.. she still can watch TV.. then my classmate and "copying" buddy CH just now came over and reminded me to do last yr papers.. think i no need to go home today liao lah.. another classmate LL just passed by me as i was typing this.. she looks half dead too ah..
aiya AB din do well for her Maths last night.. called me to release stress.. she quite poor thing lah.. jus encouraged her loh.. haiz.. like i say in previous post i dun think she will do well wif her lax attitude but she dun listen.. haiz.. 不听老人言，吃亏在眼前..hope she will do well for her management paper..asked me go fetch her after her papers.. dun fetch lah.. think i her personal chauffeur ah..
H's family actually quite complicated.. haiz.. din know her family got problem one.. that day counselled and encouraged her over sms .. hope the crisis will tide over.. another thing.. H always sms me funny stuff.. yest ask me what else do i like to talk about other than studies.. ask me is it she sms too much.. haiz..i so busy aldy still ask me funny questions.. i also dunno how to reply her.. dun reply lah..
Kanna slaughtered today at Portfolio Management paper.. but think it was a mass massacre anyway.. so 要死大家一起死...supposed to have been the easiest paper but somehow our prof CCT always make simple things difficult..
today was studyin wif M until we really nothing to study.. funny M jioed me study this morning.. think she too bored at home liao lah.. CT abit funny lah.. asked her come over sit wif us.. dun want.. CT gonna married on 7th Jan, then she like very relac.. no need to do anything.. i think she is the most bo chup bride i seen.. actually honestly i feel that she doesn't want to get married leh.. i asked her she happy anot .. she like dun seem excited.. mayb sometimes when u wanna back out but u feel its too late then u force yurself to go ahead still..
today during lunch, heard something not so good from M.. it seems that my JC 校花 LL had run away from home, MIA n lost contact wif everybody.. actually according to M, this had happened awhile back.. she had been wif this super nice senior HJC yandao call D for quite a while.. then dunno why suddenly she fell for this "ugly 40 yr old bald guy"( M's own words). M say suspect she kanna "Gong tao" (black magic)..haiz.. seem like the most happening JC class in my batch S65 alot of unfortunate things happen.. 3 deaths - 2 suicides, 1 accident and now this thing.. i rem i once had a crush on LL too lah but very long ago.. no wonder nobody really know wat happened to her all these while.. quite sad to hear abt her becoming like that..really pray that she is alright wherever she is right now..
M was commenting that ppl w/o God can live quite messed up life which i agreed.. i guess u can really do anything and live however u like if u dun have any boundaries..
Met my childhood good fren SX in lib while typin this.. really had a good catch up wif him..
Another day of studyin bond yields, call-put arbitrage, securty market line.. very saturated liao lah.. forunately got CT to study wif me then we can entertain each other.. haiz. she left early today to watch her favourite drama serial call 人间蒸发 on cable vision cos its the last episode.. she TV addict lah.. every TVB show like she got watch ..her HP like hotline.. keep on got unknown ppl and nos calling her.. helped her answer one of the calls which claims to be from DBS bank.. dunno true anot..we were sayin the guy prob say he from bank after hearing my voice.. told her its all her ex bf comin to stalk her..ha..
i look very tired and old meh? CT say my eyes like very tired and got wrinkles. actually i notice it for some time liao and frens have told me too.. but i have been living in self-deception..under persuasion from CT, decided to buy some eye patch thing from SMU Watson to try..she tried to get me to buy some Loreal eye cream but i think its too Gu Niang liao lah.. these kind of things only zabo and metrosexual know lah..
Was having some discussion wif CT over lunch then we realise that i am quite a Male Chauvinist.. actually i feel there's nothin wrong wif being a MC (no "P" pls).. a guy shld always protect and help the fairer sex mah..not sayin that he is stronger or anythin.. gals are of cos stronger in certain areas than guys.. e.g like buying eye cream(ha - jus kiddin) .. cos God has created us differently, there can never be complete gender equality lah (sorry to all the feminists out there)..there can be equality in status but never equality in roles..the father can't replace the role of the mother neither can the mother replace the father..
Thank God CH picked up my SMU card in the toilet.. think i study until very blur lah.. today i and CT went to the Audio/Visual resource center to study.. i taut wun see any of our classmates there then CH studyin there and saw us together.. he jus jioed me eat dinner wif the rest but din join them cos not hungry.. think its gonna be their dinner time talk abt me and CT lah.. haiz.. like how they say me and M last time.. guy and gal classmate study together means something meh? alamak.. ppl sometime narrow-minded leh..
AB sms me today.. asked me help her wif her Maths..actually i had the impetus to just reject her.. but she is my "biaomei" lah.. no matter how bad her attitude has been sometime.. she was wif me at one of my lowest point during my confrontation wif AM.. i always believe this : "宁可人负我，不可我负人".. i will rather be the one who apologise or stretch out a hand irregardless who the person is or how bad an attitude the person has.. cos i believe that even though i can't control how others behave but i am responsible for my own actions and character..in the Bible the good samaritan was praised bcos of his own decision to help the poor guy by the roadside not bcos the others had chosen not to help
Anw gg off to teach some integration and matrix liao.. dunno if i can still recall anot..
Just finished my Equities exams..1 down 3 to go! ..it was ok lah .. not as difficult as i taut.. aiya to be honest i got peep at one of my fren's MCQ question lah.. hope my prof dun see this blog lah..ha.. aiya just heard from EL that the prof got copy some questions from Stellar Guide.. Wah Piangz.. the question I practise all din come out leh.. Tio Pian..=(
Today whole day studied in lib with CT..was abit surprised when she sms me yest to jio me study together .. think her fiance (who is also "ivan") quite fortunate to have her. Contrary to wat many in the class think abt her as being "dao" and "Ah Lian".. actually she is quite a "girly" person.. abit 撒娇..in singlish its "deah1" ..also abit low self esteem leh.. quite pretty aldy still say ugly..i think wif her height and features..shld have won the nus pagaent she was asked to join if she had joined but she din want.. but like i told her she looks better in real person without makeup than in pics..her wedding pics dun look nice leh..think too much makeup.. My classmates MG and SK saw me with her studyin and gg lunch.. hope they dun misunderstand lah..
anw back to study for the other subjects.. some of my classmates go mini-celebrate.. celebrate wat lah.. sat finish then celebrate..
wah piangz.. the aircon here in ntu lib is sub zero loh.. think anytime now snow gonna fall from its ceiling.. gotta type something b4 my fingers freeze..
recently was watching a show then heard this saying which actually i heard along time back.. "说是天下无敌，做就无能为力" .. everybody want to be successful in life.. yes.. even paikias, ah bengs and ah lians.. nobody wanna stay poor, destitute and lonely.. and wat drives u are yur dreams.. Bible says Without a vision the people perish.. i rem this rerun episode of 出路 last week when 陈虾 met 红豆 and he picked himself out of his opium addiction.. c'mon.. its only a TV show.. but its still true in real life..if u dun have any hope in life, u dun see yurself having a happy family, u dun see yurself doing well in yur career, u dun see yurself getting good grades, u wun make the effort to strive towards all these.. u will just waste yur time and money on short term cheap thrills that dun contribute to something tangible in the long term..
But saying all these.. it is easy to dream.. (just shut yur eyes and zzz).. its easy to say u want to be so and so . or achieve this and that but wat makes the difference in saying and doing is getting down to doing things.. 说是天下无敌，做就无能为力.. u can say alot
told AT i can;t find her hotstuff magazine yet lah.. must be too hot.. ha.. she also very dare one lah.. ownself go tokyo explore.. can;t even speak proper japanese.. young gals nowadays.. hiaz..
sometimes all of us need a little motivation.. but i can't seem to find it..i taut it could be but it isn't.. haiz.. jus have to move on..
After exams..before Pst Phil svc.. MKC wanted to jus take fotos...jpg)
after sat paper.. rushed down to east coast to join the combined cg cycling event.. "Tour De East Coast".. when i reached there.. it almost end aldy but managed to talk to WW's tuition kid JY and MK's fren R.. think they enjoyed themselves.. MKC and KL really spent alot of effort to organize while my N280 just reaped the efforts.. haiz.. paisay..
i left at 6 to fetch DN at bishan mrt to go down marina to watch 门徒.. the show is good lah but i dun think worth 4 stars like the papers say leh.. i give it 3 stars ba..not enff action leh i think.. think 张静初's acting was superb..actuali she and Daniel Wu are the main cast..古天乐 and anita yuen abit cala faire leh..wanted to go the river hongbao to walk but we too lazy so in the end din go..
